Another MIL/Christmas AIBU.

[Marioandluigi]

Sorry, its another one, but I really wanted opinion

We have gone to MIL for breakfast (after we have opened all our presents) for the last couple of years, but this year I have decided that its too much, DS2 who has SN doesnt like going to her house so screams constantly, she does it at a funny time so the children are hungry and mardy and everything is a rush. DH agrees that its not a great arangement so instead we invited them for tea.

MIL has told DH that she wants the children to wait until they visit in the evening to open thier presents. I dont want to do this for two reasons.

1)I love it when the children come down on Christmas morning to open thier presents, all the excitement and fun playing with new toys. This is what we have always done and it means I wont have to deal with the DC's asking to open thier presents all day because they are expecting to open them in the morning.

2. She has never been here to see the children open our pressies before, and she brings her presents with her.

AIBU to say we will let the children open the presents from us in the morning? I invited her round to ours in the morning but she refused.

YANBU - they'll open their MIL presents when she is there after all

She expects the kids to wait ALL DAY to open their presents ? Or just to open the ones she gives them ?

YANBU

Tell her to not be so absurd, your kids can open the presents SHE buys them when she gets there, but will be opening the rest of their presents on Christmas morning.

People are strange.

YANBU - your house, your rules, your bloody kids. Let them open your presents in the morning and they can then 'look forward' to your MIL's presents later on. And also then MIL's gifts won't get overlooked/opened-and-discarded, as so often happens in the thrill of kiddy present opening.
Repeat: She is not the boss of you.

She is bvvvvvu.

They can open hers when she gets there.

Eh - she wants them to wait all day? WTF business is it of hers?

How bizarre, just tell her no.

YANBU Christmas is a time for children and I couldn't wait for my dc to open their presents never mind expect them to wait!

She's being ridiculous, how will you even begin to explain it to your dc's!!
They can open her presents when she arrives, if she wants to see the kids open their pressies she needs to get to yours at the crack of dawn.

YANBU

YANBU

How on Earth could children be expected to wait that long?

LOL the expectations of some people amaze me!

YANBU, of course.

YANBU - your kids, your decision - they are not there purely for her entertainment.

Don't even tell her, if she mentions it on the day just tell her it was what the kids wanted to do and therefore is up to them

When i was younger we used to be allowed to open our stocking presents in the morning and then the "under tree" presents after christmas lunch when the family was around. Could you do two "tranches" of presents in this way as a compromise?? YANBU at all but i have this sort of thing with my in laws the whole time and know that compromises are often easier!

we did stockings as soon as we woke and fc presenrs

then waited til coffee time, 11am when everyone was breakfasted and dressed (mainly for the adults and granparents staying over) and had under the tree presents ie from all the relatives

I have mentioned this before, but what did she do when her child(ren) were little?

Did she do what she wanted, or did she dance to her MILs tune?

I´m sure she would love to see her grandchildren open their presents, and you have given her that chance.

She has had her years of watching her children open their presents,and now it´s your turn.

YANBU. SOunds like she's just trying to control your Christmas as much as she can because you're doing your own thing this year.

Bambino, I think your right

tell her you will gladly record your kids ripping open their presents on xmas MORNING like all overly excited oh my god santy came children do

And then she can sit down with a cup of tea and some xmas cake later that day and watch it all over again on the big screen

yanbu about the present thing - after all, you invited her to come and join you for it.
although in our house we have stockings (full of little bits) in the morning first thing, and presents after xmas dinner which is usually about 4pm. kids don't mind, and keeps the anticipation going longer.

is she secretly a bit miffed that you are not going to hers? could you keep present back each - not because you feel you have to, but just to make her happy? (and keep her sweet?) I mean it's no skin off your nose really is it?

That's totally bizarre and unkind of her to expect your children to wait all day for their presents. Be assertive and say no! Blimey.

I'd be forced to assume that someone has got the wrong end of the stick and she clearly CAN'T mean that she expects the children to wait ALL DAY to open ALL their presents...

Presumably she means that she wants to wait to bring the presents from her with her so she can see them open those ones...

unkind? it's not unkind. it's just not what the op usually does.

don't necessarily think op should comply, but given MIL is compromising on what she would really like to happen, would it really hurt to save a few presents till later? unless of course she has to spent the entire year pandering to the whims of her MIL. we cart all of our presents to my mum's to open - she gets so much pleasure from seeing the kids open them that it's worth the minor hassle of sticking them in a cardboard box in the boot.