To think bil should bugger off and mind his biz

[bratnav]

BIL has been staying with us for nearly four weeks since my sis kicked him out and he lost his job (same week).

Since he moved in he has been given £3k by his father so he can sort out a flat, this was 2 weeks ago. He has a job which will start at the start of the year. For the last week he has been asking our opinon on where he should go on holiday for 2 weeks before he moves into his new flat. He has not once offered to pay for any extra food we have bought in or offered to do any housework, despite the fact that he hangs around the house all day and we have 4 dcs including a 12 week old baby. Also dh was made redundant and is trying to set up a new business so money is tight

All this is irritating but I can cope with it up to a point. This morning he strolled downstairs and asked me if I had a nice night at the farm last night? I had no idea what he was on about and must have looked blank, he then said, well I assume from the noises coming from your room last night you had borrowed some animals from the city farm. I was stunned at the decking cheek of him and just walked out of the room. I haven't mentioned it to dh yet.

AIBU to rip his head off, cut his bollocks off, stick them down his neck and literally kick him out of my home?

Spooky. My BIL and SIL lived with us for months because of money issues. They didnt contribute either AND BIL kept on commenting about our sex lives.

We tried very hard to be quiet but I think he must have had a glass to the wall or something.

It was gross. I wish i'd made a comment about it at the time.

Shrieking, if it had been my DSis/female friend who was staying I would have had a similarly caustic remark following that comment believe me

I apologise however if it caused you offence.

BTW I really don't think we are that noisy, certainly neither of us make 'farm' noises

If he is your sisters ex he is not relation of yours and not your problem chuck him out

"Why do women, by virtue of their sex, feel that this entitles them to use such caustic innuendo regarding men? Would we be so flippant if a male joked about hacking a womans breasts off?"

I think that if the situation had been reversed and the OP had been a man complain about a SIL behaving in that way, then yes.

Also OP, good on your DH! Glad you are rid of the idiot.

Hooray! Glad your DH has turfed him out... I was going to suggest that he spend his money on a holiday at a Travelodge....

Don't let him back, he's not your problem.

According to DH, BIL whimpered about being lonely now that he doesn't have DSis and that he would have to go to a B&B. DH replied that if he spoke to DSis like he did me that he was not surprised that she turfed him out, and perhaps he should think about that before he complains about B&Bs etc

I feel like dancing round the house naked just because I can

Hehe, go for it, you might want to shut the curtains first so you don't give your neighbours a shock

Definitely give him a list of things for him to do around the house every morning. Be very matter-of-fact about it; just present him with it - Oh John, this morning I need you to do x and this afternoon y. No discussion, no comments welcome. This is your house, he is behaving at best insentively and at worst he is taking the piss.

I'm most impressed you had sex with a 12 week baby

I mean obviously having a 12 week baby not having sex with the baby! Blimey I'll shut up now and note to self preview posts first

Good on DH Must agree that it isn't about the money, as no amount is worth putting up with such rudeness!

I was thinking the very same verytellytubby!

That's another reason for him to go, we had just got back into that side of things when he turned up and he has been seriously cramping our style!!

ROFL StayFrosty, he is rather lovely

Shrieking Harpy, MN is supposed to be a safe place for people to have a rant - since the op hasn't even made a negative comment to her BIL, I think she's just letting off a little steam here, and his bollocks are quite safe. Suggest you get off your high horse and appreciate her comments for the expression of frustration, rather than intent, that everyone else on this thread has understood.

I would explain in simple terms that you have had to act like animals at the trough as money is tight and you have a magpie in the next flapping his wings and creating unrest.

Unfortunatley he thought he was being really clever and what he doesn't reaslise is that he just bit the and that has been feeding him - ignoramus no wonder his wife is living in peace

actually he is probably jealous - cos he aint getting any.

make sure you have noisey, loud passionate sex every night till he leaves

Your DH sounds divine Your BIL sounds an arse!

Fuck a duck he is back

He was at Heathrow at 10am this morning, DSis called him (she isn't coping with their DS) and said that she wanted to talk about getting back together (has done this several times when she wants help with DS, I know she has no intention of taking him back), he came back to talk to her, she wouldn't talk to him, he arrived at 8pm, opened the door with a key

He has now called DSis and said that HE wont have HER back, for the love of God, I no longer care, just bugger off out of my house He is booked on a noon flight tomorrow

Off with him (BIL). Have it off with DH - sounds a good man.

Dear me, what people are like with extended family when they treat their own like crap....

It's a shame, though, that your DS seems a bit dependent on this idiot .