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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

really really beyond peeved

37 replies

CurtainTwitcher · 09/11/2009 09:43

am I over reacting?
husband[not dear now] took DS just turned 6 to nottingham to watch the wrestling yesterday. Anyways they come home at 11pm and H is running through the day where he gets the point of telling me that he left ds alone while he went to buy hotdogs. I am fecking seething over this and have actually kicked h out last night as he couldnt see what he had done wrong until I pointed out would he have left his car keys sitting on the seat to which he replied no..so of course I replied why the feck would you leave our son then!!! Its not like he had all the kids[we have 3 others] with him etc it was just him and ds all he had to do was take him with him. I havent seen or spoken to h since last night and to be honest I really dont want to. I am completely beyond angry at his irresponsible parenting

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 09/11/2009 09:48

I don't blame you

utterly stupid thing that he did

in a crowd, your ds could have been abducted in a matter of seconds

ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 09/11/2009 09:49

loathe to say this but YABU. Just assuming that your son is old enough to go to wrestling matches, he is old enough to sit and wait while his dad pops off for some hot dogs. TBH, i would be seething too - but you threw him out?? REally??? Blimey - lets hope he doesn't take you at your word and not come back - surely you cna't want that? Yeah, he was an idiot and shouldnt really have left the boy and personally I~ wouldnt want my children watching wrestling, its hardly a deal breaker.

You've shot yourself in the foot here, now its YOU who needs to apologise for the mega over reaction.

MavisEnderby · 09/11/2009 09:50

surely he can SEE that he should have taken ds with him?

YANBU.

ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 09/11/2009 09:50

waves manically at anyfucker (LEM here - i needed to ask a q this morning) (wonders if you even remember me)

Firawla · 09/11/2009 09:51

yabu in your reaction. yanbu to be annoyed by it but it is done now and you can't change that, luckily your son is fine. rather than kick out your husband, could you not have calmly explained its dangerous and get the point clearly to him that next time don't do it. that would have been sufficient, but now that you have gone so ott as this and kicked him out and acted like that, you are the one in the wrong not your dh

RealityBites · 09/11/2009 09:52

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AnyFucker · 09/11/2009 09:53

hi, LEM, yes I remember you

Original poster
CurtainTwitcher · 09/11/2009 09:54

I havent thrown him out I told him to leave before I lamped him so he took that option. I am still to angry to talk to him.
As for him being old enough to go to wrestling matches, he is old enough to do a lot of things, I am takign 2 of my girls to see princess on ice in a couple of weeks they are 2 and 3 because they are old enough to go does that mean they are old enough to sit alone while I 'pop' to the loo in a huge arena??

OP posts:
MavisEnderby · 09/11/2009 09:54

oK must learn to read posts rproperly,yanbu to be mad but maybe a bit ott to kick him out.A bit ofgrovelling on his part is in order though!

AJ123 · 09/11/2009 09:54

YANBU. Maybe the kicking out bit wasn't necessary, but can completely understand you being so angry. You only have to turn on the news most days to see how he was totally irresponsible...Hopefully he will see that and learn his lesson.

Knickers0nMaHead · 09/11/2009 09:55

Yanbu. What a twattish thing to do!

diddl · 09/11/2009 09:56

Actually I´m with Ijustwant

If you think your son is old enough to be there, then he´s old enough to be left in his seat, imo.

posieparker · 09/11/2009 09:57

Perhaps you should trawl the internet for the horror stories f things that could have happened to your DS and ask you H to read them.

AnyFucker · 09/11/2009 09:58

yes, my DH would have had to get out of my sight for the good of his health too !

has he been in touch this morning, OP and where did he go last night ?

gingernutlover · 09/11/2009 09:59

YANBU to be annoyed, maybe you over reacted but hopefully it will get the result you want ie he wont do it again.

6 is too old to be left in a crowd, he wouldnt know what to do in an emergency, like if the fire alarms went off. Maybe an 8 or 9 year old but even then ....

MavisEnderby · 09/11/2009 10:00

diddl At nearly 6,I'm not so sure.Maybe I am being a little precious but I took ds (Same age,) to his first football match recently and I went with him when he needed the toilet,I wouldn't have felt comfortable at leaving him to go on his own,neirther would I have left him,not through fear of abduction or anything but I still think heis too young and may have felt intimidated by being surrounded by strangers.

JTGPsmummy · 09/11/2009 10:05

Oh my god!! YANBU!!! Look at what happened to Jamie Bulger and his mum was there! I cannot begin to imagine what could have happened. But I think men don't have their brains wired like we do. My DH baths our son and one time I heard him leave our DS in the bath and go and look out the bedroom windonw. I asked him what he was doing and he siad he thought I was outside!! Who cares if I was, but I told him you never never leave them in the bath for even a second but I honestly don't think they totally understand. Not defending what your H did at all though. I too wouldn't have kicked him out but like you said in a later post, you just told him to get out of your way which is totally fair!! As for if they are old enough to watch, they are old enough to be left, total crap! I took my 20 month old DS to see Bob the Builder recently, does that mean he was old enough to be left in his seat too.

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 09/11/2009 10:05

God why do men do stupid things like this? It gets me so mad. DS is 1 yo and yesterday my dad kept taking him out of his buggy and letting him run round in a crowd and near cars. I was going mad and telling him to put DS back in his buggy and he was like I'm right here with him watching him' but it only takes a second for DS to dart under a car or something. My mum ended up telling him to get DS in his buggy and he did.

It seems like the same thing- they just do not think.

ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 09/11/2009 10:06

note to self: read OP properly before posting - he's only six, your DH was a giant twat! but i think you should have just lamped him one and not sent him packing. I assumed he was 10 or something.

ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 09/11/2009 10:08

the princess on ice thing - someone told me you can use clubcard points? Wonder if i can still book it

RealityBites · 09/11/2009 10:12

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RealityBites · 09/11/2009 10:14

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ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 09/11/2009 10:19

kicks oneself for not realising that I could use clubcard points for POI at O2. Just assumed it was out of budget. Apparently though, £7.50 for a bag of candyfloss because it had mickey mouse ears on it - feels a bit better.

Sorry, hijack

RealityBites · 09/11/2009 10:21

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diddl · 09/11/2009 10:23

Mavis, you´re right.

I do think 6 is too young to leave.
But then I think he was too young to be there.

If there were seats, he can go with Dad as seats will still be there.

If no seats, definately needs to go with Dad!