Well, ImSo, I admit that we were both working full time, and on nearly equal salaries. As time went on, he got a much better paid job, but was still putting in four fifths, probably three times what I was contributing. I did have a baby, and did quite a bit of overtime before mat leave. My money lasted until I returned to work when DS was 5mths.
The thing is, we had saved to buffer our finances to tide us over the mat leave, and could cope financially.
Obviously when couples circumstances change, the financial arrrangements should too, by mutual discussion. People can arrange the proportion of what they contribute to suit the circumstances - full time four fifths, part time two fifths for example. It doesn't matter how you do it, the point is, you are open and honest with each other and discuss it, not keep one person short and the other holding all the purse strings, making unilateral decisions about what shall or shall not be spent. I was just offering a suggestion for Stripey to consider. It seems her dh is being very evasive about their finances.
AliceT, I so hope not, for your sake! Does he go through supermarket receipts and moan about what you buy?
Neenz, it is possible to not know this will happen to you, in cases where spouses develop addictions to gambling, drugs, run up massive secret debts, and swipe all the money in desperation. As told to me by a financial advisor who had to sort out these situations. By the same token, if you are separated/divorced you should never hold a joint signatory savings account on behalf of a child/ren of that marriage, as that could be withdrawn in the same way, both parents being able to withdraw money until a child is 7 and able to hold an account in their own name.