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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

weaning....

27 replies

AliGrylls · 30/10/2009 17:32

I started weaning my child early (4 months) because he had quite bad reflux and baby rice, although not recommended in a child of such a tender age, seemed to help.

Anyway, this afternoon I was out with some friends and I was telling them, in quite some detail, about his weaning and that he actually really likes it and I got the feeling that they were looking at me like I was strange and doing something that was really unsafe. I was then asked the question "who told you to do that?" I know it was not meant to be judgemental but I did get the feeling of disapproval.

All I kept on thinking was - but you were weaned at 4 months and you are fine. I have also had quite a few discussions with people about weaning and most people seem shocked that I have gone against the advice, albeit most adults I know don't seem to be unduly affected by the early weaning they experienced as a child.

Please - am I being unreasonable for weaning my child early? Are babies stomachs really so delicate?

Also, along this line of food - at what age do you give a child the same food as you to eat. A lot of people say young children like bland food but I feel that is breeding fussiness.

OP posts:

MorrisZapp · 30/10/2009 17:34

There's a whole forum here about weaning isn't there?

Or do you want a punch-up

Firawla · 30/10/2009 17:38

weaning at 4 months is not weird its quite common. people start anywhere between 4-6 months, only if you did it before 4 months i would expect some funny looks but 4 months is very normal, may be they do not have much life experience to know that? i would ignore them. baby rice for a 4 months baby is not going to do any harm, its not as if you gave him a roast dinner the day he turned 4 months old, they are being ott.
giving the same food as adults probably depends on the child but by 1 yr they normally could eat it all?

GhoulsAreLoud · 30/10/2009 17:46

Yes, it can be harmful, there is plenty of research on it that you can access quite easily by googling.

I would recommend you do that rather than asking here, because I think you might get some answers that will upset you, sorry.

GhoulsAreLoud · 30/10/2009 17:49

With regards to your second question you can do baby led weaning (same food as adults) once your baby shows signs that they are ready to wean. This is usually around 6 month old.

Original poster

AliGrylls · 30/10/2009 17:50

I don't know whether they were being ott or whether it was a bit of my own insecurity about what I am doing, because they are all doing something different and they are so confident.

I don't have the strength for a punch up - I think I will go to the weaning forum.

Thank you firawla. You have made me feel better. I just wish I could feel a bit less insecure about the decisions I make.

OP posts:

GhoulsAreLoud · 30/10/2009 17:53

If you do feel insecure about it you could always research early weaning and give food a rest for a while.

(I have no experience of reflux or remedies for it btw).

Good luck

Original poster

AliGrylls · 30/10/2009 18:16

Ghouls,

I have checked the research and early weaning seems to be defined as 3 months (I found this in the Archives of Childhood Illness and Disease).

The risks of weaning before 4 months seem to be overweight (he is definitely never going to be an overweight baby as he is only on the first centile). I can't find anything else about it.

Before 3 months the risk is diarrhoea / GI problems.

Thank you for your advice but I think I will continue to do what I am doing.

OP posts:

GhoulsAreLoud · 30/10/2009 18:21

There are more risks than that, e.g. IBS, food allergies, coeliacs, that kind of thing, but they don't manifest until later life so a healthy looking child or baby is no guarantee that no harm has been done.

If you read the research and decide you don't agree with it, that's one thing. But you don't seem to be aware of it. So if you do want to know more it's worth looking it up.

GhoulsAreLoud · 30/10/2009 18:23

I think it puts them at increased risk of asthma and excema too. I can't remember all of the details because it's a while since I read them, but I'm pretty sure that asthma is a risk factor which I really want to avoid, as I'm asthmatic myself.

Original poster

AliGrylls · 30/10/2009 18:40

Which website did you read about these risks - I would be interested to see the article.

From what I remember about coeliac disease (from my masters in nutrition) there is a very strong genetic component as to whether it develops and this is the same for allergies.

Also, I remember reading about a study a while ago which said early exposure to potential allergens actually counters the risk of food allergies (although I am not sure what age the children were exposed).

OP posts:

GhoulsAreLoud · 30/10/2009 18:46

The WHO's research informed the guidelines, and the Dept of Health in this country also issues their guidelines based on this research.

So when you were researchinng it and read the weaning advice from the DoH you would have seen this:

"Health experts agree that around six months is the best age
for introducing solids. Before this, your baby?s digestive
system is still developing and weaning too soon may
increase the risk of infections and allergies."

I'm not attacking your choices, but you asked why you were getting funny looks about weaning early (and it is weaning early in the sense that it's earlier than our countries guidelines recommend) and I expect this is why.

bangandthedirtisgone · 30/10/2009 21:06

They probably ask you who told you to do it because if you start at 4 months it's 'supposed' to be under medical advice and supervision.

Reallytired · 30/10/2009 21:21

It would be better if parents concentrated more on their own children and worried less about what decisions other parents make.

I think that some people get the risks of weaning a 4 month old baby completely out of proportion. Even though the advice is 6 months, the majority of UK babies get food long before six months.

I started weaning when my daughter was 24 weeks. She was sitting up unaided and mouthing. With my son I started weaning at 19 weeks and he made it very clear that I should shove the baby rice where the sun doesn't shine. He really didn't want to know about food until 28 weeks.

However what is right for my daughter is not what is right for every baby. Some children walk at 9 months and other do not walk until nearer two. I think that readiness for food varies as much as any other baby developmental milestone.

Reallytired · 30/10/2009 21:21

It would be better if parents concentrated more on their own children and worried less about what decisions other parents make.

I think that some people get the risks of weaning a 4 month old baby completely out of proportion. Even though the advice is 6 months, the majority of UK babies get food long before six months.

EdgarAllenPoo · 01/11/2009 22:18

I think that some people get the risks of weaning a 4 month old baby completely out of proportion

well said.

i have heard the word 'dangerous' used , when you wouldn't use that to describe FF from birth...and whatever 'increased risk' there is (or isn't) - it will be greatly less than that.

if hose people had actually bothered to read studies on weaning (or the precis & reviews available on the web) they would realise -

the evidence on allergies is conflicted. different studies have very different conclusions - further study is required
on bowel function, the really important thing is duration of BF - if supplementation with solids helps someone stick with BF, then it has made their child healthier, not otherwise. There may be some slight benefit in leaving it later, but there is yet to be a study that picks this out separate to the benefits of BF alone in a first-world context.
some tribal cultures wean close to birth, babies are physically equipped to receive food as well as BM very young (though as chewed pap from mother) ..other tribal cultures leave it later. (though i might add it is in the 3rd world where i have most sympathy for weaning as ate as possible)

the way some people on here talk you'd think baby rice was radioactive sludge.

The WHO takes many thng sinto consideration that we wouldn't consider relevant in the uk - eg the use of EBF as birth control, the likelihood of a weaned baby dying from diahorreah being significantly increased.

EdgarAllenPoo · 01/11/2009 22:22

i have to say, i find it pretty astonishing that only 2% of the popuation EBFs to 6 months, yet when weaning comes up, it suddenly seems like everyone left it that late....

AitchTwoToTangOh · 01/11/2009 22:25

is saying 'who told you to do that?' really such a loaded thing to say? mightn't the person just have wondered who told you who to do that?

EdgarAllenPoo · 01/11/2009 22:29

hmm..well its one those questions isn't it Aitch, when you talk to other Mums ' who will admit to what first....'

AitchTwoToTangOh · 01/11/2009 22:33

i'm just not that wobbly on this parenting stuff. my kid, my decision.

EdgarAllenPoo · 01/11/2009 22:41

oh and how often you hoover is a major factor in asthma...if i recomended someone hoover every day, would i be endangering their children to a lifetime of allergies?? (stats say:maybe)
why weaning particularly is focussed upon, i believe is because formula manafacturers prefer to sell expensive 'hungry baby' formulas instead of much cheaper baby rice, and the breast feeding lobby wants to push the boob only, - there is no vested interest pushing weaning.

Original poster

AliGrylls · 22/11/2009 19:25

Really good post Edgar. The good news is thatI hardly ever hoover!

OP posts:

peppapighastakenovermylife · 22/11/2009 19:32

Ali there are a number of studies. What date was the Archives paper? These days before 17 weeks is seen as very early weaning and something definitely to be avoided.

Ideally babies are weaned around 6 months as this reduces the risk (especially gastro related stuff) and studies have shown there are no deficits to waiting til this point. Many HP's however recognise that many people do not follow the guidelines but really try to get mums not to wean until at least 17 weeks (unless health reasons for doing it). However the recommendation is still to wean at 26 weeks.

The main paper which the WHO based guidelines on (in addition to others) was Kramer & Kahuma - I think 2002. I can look it up if you like.

totalmadness · 22/11/2009 19:36

4 months is not a dangerous age to wean your baby. However I do agree that everybaby is completly different and whenever they are ready to eat - they will. People in my experience get far too up in arms over what THEY say. Mummy knows best in my house

Brunettelady · 22/11/2009 19:46

I weaned my DS at 4 months. He already had eczema from about 6 weeks old so that was never going to 'cause' it. He was on hungry baby milk quite early and was having more and more frequent full bottles. He was not over weight at all but quite a big baby and he just needed something else. I started really slowly and just gave him baby rice for a few weeks, then I introdued pureed veg (I had heard that fruit first can give them a sweet tooth), then when established on that, pureed fruit until 6 months. Then we started with meat and gluten etc. He took to it straight away and was instantly much more satisfied than with just milk.

I asked my HV for advice but the one I had at the time wasn't great and all she would say is 'oh no you can't wean before 6 months'. When I said about how frequently he wanted feeding I was just told to distract him each time!!!! What for 2 hours?! I bought a fantastic book that went from 4 months, took it really slowly and it worked a treat. I think if you wait until 6 months they need to be on lumpier and much more varied diet by 7 months which seems like a bery short space of time. I liked being able to take it slowly and my DS was definately ready then. Although I had my nan at 3 months asking when I was going to spoon feed and 'it never did me any harm'. EVERYONE seems to have such different opinions that I read up for myself then make the decision to do things when I think it is right. Currently it is potty training (DS is 21 months) but I am going to wait until I know he is ready as I think this is much more helpful to the child.

wahwah · 22/11/2009 20:17

I find it really hard to understand why it's a hardship to wait until the recommended time, or to seek professional advice if you think your baby has a particular need. Fundamentally it's your call and you can do what you want, but you can't stop people thinking what they want either.

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