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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not want to 'Forgive and Forget' yet again?

45 replies

VengefulSinner · 21/10/2009 16:54

OK - I am an only child and my father was always on a pedestal to me as a child/teen even though he has always had NOTHING but criticism for me.

This would be in forms of always telling me I was fat (I was a size 12 and 5'8 ffs) and needed to lose weight, that academically I was not/am not as good as my cousins and so on. He is also very dictatorial and it is his way or no way. He is right, you are wrong. Always.

I used to let it all go and seethe alone after, but would never hear a bad word against him. Friends and DP's could not understand my attitude to his controlling nature either.

When DS was born dad did not visit for 10 days and then refused to really spend time with him until DS could "respond to him" i.e. at least 12mths old. He has tried telling me how to parent rather than offer advice, and his ways are quite worrying. He was never around to parent me other than for few hours one night a week after school, and even then we went to my uncle's where they would sit and chat leaving me to play with my cousins.

Recently we fell out rather hugely. He has told me my whole life that if I didn't do this/that/the other then he would disown me and I would not have a father (for stupid menial things too, such as dating a black man and not ending it at dad's order).

I could handle that, BUT he started telling the same thing to DS! He was telling a 4yr old that he would not have a grandfather anymore if DS didn't give him the kisses and cuddles he wanted! I explained that DS was not as tactile as he was when a baby and that I am the only one he still kisses and cuddles every 5 mins, but this was not acceptable. He could not even accept a kiss/cuddle on arrival and departure, which I got DS to agree to and DS was getting very distressed by it all.

Things came to a head when my father could not understand a concept on the computer. I explained very patiently but when he could still not understand he flew off the handle saying that I could not teach and it was all my fault and he had had enough and was disowning me!!!!! He told me that I do not have a father anymore and not to contact him.

That was 5 weeks ago.

The past week, he has called me a few times to tell me I have some post at his address and is trying to act all normal as if nothing happened, even telling me that he will have DS overnight on such-and-such date!. He has done this before and I have always gone along with it as it only really affected me, but this time it is DS, who is a perceptive and sensitive child at the best of times without dad messing him up with threats of disownment for trivial things.

So, AIBU to not want to 'brush it all under the carpet' yet again???

OP posts:
ib · 21/10/2009 17:01

No, I think you are right.

I kind of had this with my FIL. We all went with his (frankly insane) ways because it was less hassle.

Then ds came along and he started doing it to him. I realised that it was our duty as parents to protect ds from this kind of emotional abuse. So we had to put a stop to it.

He took it really badly, and sadly I think he will never have the relationship with ds that I hoped ds would have with his grandparents (my own dad died, so fil is ds' only real chance). But I've had to accept that what I had hoped for was a fantasy, and could never have been a reality.

We have to protect ds from what reality would have been.

TheArmadillo · 21/10/2009 17:02

YANBU

It sounds like if you want a break from him for the foreseeable future or even for a couple of months now would be the time to do it.

Marioandluigi · 21/10/2009 17:02

YANBU - you have to protect your DS, which is what you are doing.

lucky1979 · 21/10/2009 17:05

He sounds dreadful so no, YANBU.

I'm not sure what to advise you to do though, if he has been like this for all your life then he's very unlikely to change now. You need to stand up for your son though, it sounds like it's really upsetting him and you have to protect him from that. My first thought on reading the whole thing is to not let him get away with this bullying and manipulation ever again, whether it is directed at you or your son, but I realise this is much easier said than done!

How does your DP feel about it all? Is your mother on the scene?

dickiethepunchlinedonkey · 21/10/2009 17:05

Sounds to me like you have taught him a valuable lesson in the last 5 weeks and he expected you to come back full of apologies etc and is now spooked that he has lost his hold over you.
Well- certainly sounds like he is rather mean but more dysfunctional than anything. I think the power (if that's the way to put it) lies with you now, and you should put him straight on what constitutes appropriate father/ grandfather behaviour. At the very bloody least i would want an apology for the shenanigans 5 weeks ago- bloody big kid= losing his rag becasue he fails to understand something- grow up man!
Can i ask is your mother around?
It's a bit last chance saloon now- he really needs to get his head sorted, and even if you are used to being talked to like a piece of dirt and being emotionally blackmailed, you surely don't want your son hanging around such poisonous behaviour.

ParisFrog · 21/10/2009 17:07

YANBU. Relationships with parents can be extremely complicated. You've tried but he is obviously not willing to meet you half way.

Maybe call his bluff? Say that you feel very sorry and sad that he sees x problem as so large it will cause him to disown you, but that he is an adult and can make his own decisions.

He seems to be very controlling, and as you say, you don't want DS you go through what you did in your childhood.

RainRainGoAway · 21/10/2009 17:07

You need time away from your toxic father.
Just tell him you need to reassess your relationship and need time out from contact.
Don't cut off all ties, but don't let him boss you around or use emotional blackmail.

VengefulSinner · 21/10/2009 17:09

I do want a break from him, but when he called and I was clipped with him, he made out like it was all down to me and implied that I am being childish by carrying the bad feelings on.

I also feel some guilt as he is completely alone with no friends and family - he fell out with my uncle and other family are abroad, so I was/am his only contact out of work...

But yes, I must put DS first. He has (sadly for family reasons) been much happier and stable since the fall out and has not mentioned his grandad once. I think that says a lot?

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 21/10/2009 17:09

Oh good god woman YANBU!

Keep this madman away from your DS, and maybe the distance will do you some good too. But be sure to let your son know that this has nothing to do with how he has behaved with his grandfather, since your dad has already been dripping this 'disowning' poison into his ear. Make it clear that your dad has behaved badly and is on the naughty step indefinitely for a while and it has nothing to do with your DS. Children are so prone to feeling responsible for things they are not responsible for - but I expect you know that all too well already.

Longtalljosie · 21/10/2009 17:10

YANBU. Have a think about what sort of an influence this man has been on your life. If you don't want your DS to have a similar influence, distance yourself. And get your mail redirected.

Biobytes · 21/10/2009 17:11

YANBU. Actually, I would have disowned him myself if I were you.

iwascyteenagewerewolf · 21/10/2009 17:11

YANBU. My grandfather was like this and I wish my dad had cut contact with him, for all our sakes.

VengefulSinner · 21/10/2009 17:12

There is no DP anymore, he became an XP a while ago, and I am very close to my mother. Parents divorced when I was 3 and mother has never got on with him since. My Mother is very supportive of me, DS and my parenting methods, and finds my father ridiculous

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 21/10/2009 17:12

Do not feel guilt - there is a good reason why he has no friends and family, it's his own fault. Take your lead from your DS - happiness is not seeing your father!

dickiethepunchlinedonkey · 21/10/2009 17:12

speaks volumes

RainRainGoAway · 21/10/2009 17:13

So don't cut off ties, just distance yourself. You don't need to get lead into a row or allow negative comments. I personally would keep phone calls short but sweet but decline contact for the next month or so. You can tell him that your feelings may be 'childish' but that is how you feel so perhaps he needs to reassess the way he deals with you or he will only be hurting himself.

mathanxiety · 21/10/2009 17:13

Recommend the toxic parents book that's been touted on many threads here. Also this. Big decisions lie ahead for you. This kind of person doesn't change, ime.

Tortington · 21/10/2009 17:14

he sounds insane.

VengefulSinner · 21/10/2009 17:15

I felt I was doing the right thing, but was also second-guessing myself as he is my father and it does hurt to break that bond.

I think you are all right and for my own sanity and the future sanity of DS I will break ties.

Thank you for helping me feel better about it and that I ANBU

OP posts:
dickiethepunchlinedonkey · 21/10/2009 17:17

Oh well- at least your mum can see he's ridiculous- good that you have her on side.
Sadly your dad seems a bit old school (and then some) with the sulking, passive aggression, temper tantrums etc.
And look where it's got him- no family, except you.
Great strategy in life
Good luck but don't give in- all on your terms- apology, better behaviour or you'll bloody disown HIM!

Jux · 21/10/2009 18:46

My dad was old school; by which I mean, courteous, tolerant, thoughtful, kind, considerate.

Your dad is not. As your mum says, he's ridiculous. Try to laugh at him (at least, when he's not there - not to his face (yet!)). It'll make you feel better.

diddl · 21/10/2009 18:53

He sounds awful.

And from what I can see, he didn´t put you on a pedastal-or if he did, it was only for the fun of knocking you off!

I think you need to act as the adult, as your father obviously doesn´t seem to.

posieparker · 21/10/2009 19:04

Good God, the man has some serious self esteem issues. Sounds like he's living his life by proxy.

Be strong, take a stand but understand that he would probably rather be out of your life than admit he's wrong. Not because he doesn't love you but because his pride would be too difficult to overcome.

Take Carexxx

caramelwaffle · 21/10/2009 19:20

YANBU - a litte bit of distance would do you the world of good.

Nahla · 21/10/2009 19:55

Can you imagine what he would do/say to your DS to try to convince him to be more affectionate with him?

Do you want your DS to learn/think this is how he should bring up his own children?

Speak with him on the phone or visit occasionally if you must, but don't let this man continue to make people's lives so horrible

I'm at him believing you are 'being childish by carrying bad feelings on'. Yes, because disowning someone is such a temporary measure right?