to be feeling utterly exhausted by DD2 and her list of complaints?

[EccentricaGallumbats]

This morning

I'm tired
The toothpaste is too minty
My toothbrush has scratched my gums
I feel sick
My foot hurts
I hate PE
I feel sick
I can't do PE my foot hurts
I can't find my planner
I feel sick
I hate XXXX
My foot hurts
I can't do PE my foot hurts
I'm tired
My toast is too cooked
I feel sick
XXXX is horrble
I hate my french teacher
My foot hurts
I feel sick
I can't find my blaizer
It's cold
I'm tired
I feel sick
I hate school
I hate french
I hate science
I hate PE
I hate xxx
I hate you
I feel sick

etc etc etc etc etc etc etc

Her foot hurts beause she was stamping around in a temper on monday. since then she has been out riding her bike, walking, running, dancein etc so not really hurt.
Her bag, breakfast, planner, school books and blaiser were in their usual places
I had the heating on so it wasn't cold.
If she went to sleep a bit earlier she wouldn't be so tired.
If she stopped bloody complaining about everything all the bloody time she might realise that her life isn't that bad after all.

I ignore all the above, and have been doing so for years and years.
I acknowlege her moans, I sometimes agree with her. I witter on inanely to try and distract her. I don't give in and let her stay in bed and never have.

What the bloody hell do I do with her?

oh god help me how long does it take

i am still trying to get my head round my 14 year old thinking i am horrid because i dont want her pig sty of a room stinking out the house.

and yes she hates me because i ask her to put her clothes away - you know the nice clean ones that you spend hours washing drying etc only to find it back in laundry basket cos she cant be bothered to put it away - tho to be fair - she probably couldnt because of all the rubbish she had stashed in her drawers - wardrobe

dont even get me started on the homework row.

its exhausting and horrible knowing that as soon as you open your mouth to ask something you get atttude back. and then she complains because you get cross with her tone of voice?????

finally had enough and she is being moved out of her room into the smallest one.

Normally, i would chase her round the house yelling give us a hug, but must admit i feel totally done in.

stop washing her clothes for two weeks.

At 11 - has she just started high school?

If so her usual friends may be moving on from her and she is feeling left out or intimidated by more people around.

If still at junior school she is getting worried about moving to high school and leaving the security of all she knows.

My 14yr old dd did it and we are coming out the other side now.
My 10yr old ds is just starting but he is a lot easier all round.

Stick with it.
Every time she says I hate you, say back 'I love you but sometimes I don't like you!'that causes a reaction and changes the subject as she then asks why and when?

sorry, my comment was for Miki43

The distraction/encouragement/positive praise approach clearly isn't working so I would suggest a radically different tack. I freely admist to being a fairly vile and unpleasant teenager from around 13 to around 15. The turning point came when my older brother (17 at the time so angst ridden and attitude laden himself) pointedly said to me one day in a really calm voice "you know what sometimes you're really horrible to be around". Doesn't sound much but actually being told how awful I was was a real shocker. A long tearful conversation with my mum ensued and almost overnight I became a much happier less angst-ridden girl. Sometimes we just need to be told bluntly how unpleasant we are and how boring it is to have to deal with unnecessary attitude all the time.