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AIBU?

To be p*ssed off that ds1 is missing the school trip today?

100 replies

beansprout · 14/10/2009 09:56

I arrived at school this morning to discover that ds1's class is going on a trip today, but not ds1, as I knew nothing about it.

When I spoke to the teacher she told me that she was not there on the day the forms were given out. This happens to be a day that I work and ds1 goes to after school club so I can see how that by the time he is picked up, at 5pm, he has forgotten about the letter. The teacher said she was surprised that ds1 was not on the list to go, but she does see me on a regular basis, so why not mention it?

Ds1 has struggled to settle in (he has just started reception) so that fact that he going to be left behind today is particularly upsetting.

OP posts:

Report

Disenchanted3 · 14/10/2009 10:40

Hang on, its a whole school trip yet theres no place left for your DS?? What if you had replied 'yes' would an extra seat have magically grown on the coach?

BudaBones · 14/10/2009 10:42

That is just ridiculous. I would be seriously complaining.

MollieO · 14/10/2009 10:45

If ds wasn't registered for a trip that everyone else was going on I would expect to get a call from the school to follow up. I work and ds goes to before and after school care. Notes come home via his reading folder but if we don't reply we get chased.

Completely unacceptable that the teacher didn't bother to mention anything and I'm surprised that the list of attendees was only supplied to the teacher yesterday. She knows who is in her class and I would have expected her to keep a separate record of who had replied and who had not.

I would be on the phone to the head and expect them to amend whatever rubbish system they have in place to take account of pupils who attend before/after school care and therefore whose parents don't have face time with the teacher.

starwhoreswonaprize · 14/10/2009 10:46

Can't you take him?

colditz · 14/10/2009 10:46

I would be extremely suspicious as to how they'd have got him there if you had said yes.

I suspect they rely on one or two people not getting the letter in order to use fewer coaches and spend less money.

if it was only your ds and two other kids, i can see they could be extremely tempted not to book another coach for the sake of three children.....

I would collect him and invent a dentist appointment, and take him to McD's, poor kid.

scroobiuspirate · 14/10/2009 10:47

what disenchanted said.

someone's got your child's seat.

Pyrocanthus · 14/10/2009 10:50

What colditz said - take the opportunity of a quiet day to get him a full check-up at the venue of his choice.

Rachmumoftwo · 14/10/2009 10:50

Try to speak to the parents of the other 2 children- I bet they are equally upset.

facebookaddict · 14/10/2009 10:51

Invent dentist appointment/death in extended family/concern over a fever he had in the night and get him out.

How awful for the 3 not going. I wonder if the other 2 parents are aware....

Would you name and shame the school?

facebookaddict · 14/10/2009 10:53

Actually on reflection, go for unauthorised absence assuming that it is likely to be the only one the whole year in any case.

(My DCs are too young for me to know the consequence of unauthorised absences but assuming you have to have quite a few to get into any trouble with social services or whomever monitors these things...)

Disenchanted3 · 14/10/2009 10:54

Yes, go and get him and do something nice today.

2shoescreepingthroughblood · 14/10/2009 10:56

can't believe they trust a 4 year old to take home a letter.
I would keep him off

beansprout · 14/10/2009 10:56

Thanks for all your points and support (some of which I will be using in my letter to the head! ) Using a system that relies on a 4yo remembering things is just ridiculous

I can't sort anything out for ds2 (who is 1 so not good for proms!) so I can't take him myself. Will speak to the other parents though.

The teacher was v annoying though. Will see the TA when I pick him up later and will have the same discussion again, I'm sure . It's the "there is nothing we can do" when that's just actually not true that is really bugging me!!!

OP posts:

Hando · 14/10/2009 10:57

I agree with Colditz, they obviously decided to not pay for a whole extra coach just for 3 seats, assuming some kids would be absent or not want to go.

I would go and pick him up right now and take him out somewhere nice for the afternoon. Can't imagine he'll be learning much as surely his teacher is off on the trip?

I'd write an official complaint to the head and request a response in writing.

mazzystartled · 14/10/2009 10:57

where is trip to?

if you are off work can you take him along and meet them there?

i think its totally bizarre that they wouldn't follow up with the 3 parents they didn't get a response from.

mazzystartled · 14/10/2009 10:59

can one of the teachers not take him in their car?

Hando · 14/10/2009 10:59

Mazzy, I was just about to say that too - if you're not working today OP why not go collect your ds and drive him to where the trip is - I assume it's not that far away?

Mazzy, if they chased up the parents then they'd have to pay for that extra coach just for 3 seats!

FimbleHobbs · 14/10/2009 11:07

I would be fuming in your situation. I really feel for you.

Squishabelle · 14/10/2009 11:09

Some schools are really crap about things like this. DDs primary does a residential to an outdoor activity centre every year for year 6. But they never book enough places. Places are done by ballot and when it was dds time to go she and only 2 others got left behind.

I tried everything to enable these 3 to go to no avail.

I moved dd to another primary for her last 6 months because of this.

OrmIrian · 14/10/2009 11:09

How stupid!

DS lost a form about going to the theatre. I received another form the following week after the deadline has supposedly passed because they realised what had probably happened.

Your poor DS

Squishabelle · 14/10/2009 11:10

Sorry should have said dds old primary. This happened a few years ago and it still rankles.

LadyMuck · 14/10/2009 11:11

Sorry, but all bar 3 children in the school are not going? Or is that just 3 in the class?

Totally ridiculous.

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3littlefrogs · 14/10/2009 11:12

Squishabelle That is awful. So 2 or 3 kids get left behind every year? I would go to the local press!

Pyrocanthus · 14/10/2009 11:12

Bizarre, Squish.

Hassled · 14/10/2009 11:14

This is just so bloody insane - I am livid on your behalf. Most schools operate on the assumption that letters get lost, and where trips are involved they chase the parents. If you're not happy with the HT's reponse, get on to the Governors.

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