To think that if your child hasnt learned enough in 6 years of school to qualify for a Grammar School then extra tuition is just setting them up to pass an exam ?

[letsgostrawberrypicking]

And then they have to cope with 5 years or so at a school they may find really tough?

I can understand if your local comp is really pants but friends of mine have dds that didnt qualify for GS even though they had intensive tutoring pre test, they then appealed, failed, gave more tutoring, did the 12+ and finally passed it.

Such pressure on the children!

Genuine question - does it really matter that much? I have never seen why a GS is so good, if you child is learning at their own rate isnt that good enough?

Our neighbours son went to grammar when perhaps he shouldn't have really, got in on appeal. She's basically doing all his homework for him, he's done ok in his year 7 tests but she's happy enough because he's surrounded by the top 25% of kids in the area and therefore less likely to fail completely rather being influenced by the bottom 75% who might drag him down. Can kind of see where she's coming from, if all his mates are off to Uni he won't want to be the one left behind will he ?

In my DCs GS it's the ones from private schools who join in the Sixth form who can't keep up.

Funny that The Pumpkin Eater, it's usually the other way round here.

All this makes me so very grateful that there are no grammar schools where we are.

I went to an academically cruddy private school and did well, despite being incredibly lazy and disorganised. In a grammar school I would have been considered a failure by comparison with all the other bright and hardworking children. I quite like the idea of my clever little girl (who is also quite lazy) going to a local comp where she'll be considered one of the smart ones. So good for her self-esteem; and with our support I'm sure she'll get adequate exam results - or at least good enough to get her into a reasonable sixth form college.

At least this is the positive spin I'm putting on not being able to get her into an academically selective, popular school!