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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Stoned childminder...

40 replies

Ronaldinhio · 20/09/2009 22:42

Someone I know, closely, is in the final stages of applying to be a childminder.
Thing is she's a very heavy user of marijuana.
She needs to use it every day, throughout the day, to help cope with a number of ongoing issues including longterm and severe depression.

Her illness and drug use makes her behaviour paranoid and erratic, she suffers from mood swings and debilitating panic attacks.

I think that this is entirely the wrong move for her and for her potential charges but she won't hear a word of it as she needs the money.

AIBU to speak with someone in authority about my concerns?

OP posts:
charcharcharlepew · 20/09/2009 22:43

YANBU.

LuluMamaaaaarrrrr · 20/09/2009 22:44

if you are sure that this is the case, tehn YANBU at all and need to speak to OFSTED

CharCharGabor · 20/09/2009 22:44

Definitely yanbu, black and white imo.

Bookswapper · 20/09/2009 22:44

of course not
you absolutely should

cheesesarnie · 20/09/2009 22:44

yanbu.you would be being unreasonable if you didnt voice your concerns!

tessofthedurbervilles · 20/09/2009 22:44

No do it, would you forgive yourself if something happened to an innocent child cos she was off her tits and a child got hurt? Its a no brainer for me.

kylesmybaby · 20/09/2009 22:45

you should probably speak directly to her.

hf128219 · 20/09/2009 22:45

Not safe for her to continue to do this when childminding.

OrangeFish · 20/09/2009 22:46

Please do

AnyFucker · 20/09/2009 22:46

oh dear, what a horrible position you are in

have you spoken to her in no uncertain terms that you think she is out of order to be considering this ?

if you have and she is ignoring you, then, yes, you have to take your concerns further

LuluMamaaaaarrrrr · 20/09/2009 22:46

is she getting any help for her illness? also , having illegal substances in the house with young children aboutis a bad idea

Original poster
Ronaldinhio · 20/09/2009 22:46

problem is she's family... but it's bloody terrible to imagine that she'd be in charge of a child, let alone a number of children

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 20/09/2009 22:47

never mind family, the same rules apply

hf128219 · 20/09/2009 22:48

I agree very difficult but you must think of the children.

OrangeFish · 20/09/2009 22:48

well... even more so, if she is family, chances are that you are in a better position to evaluate potential dangers than one she only knows casually

Original poster
Ronaldinhio · 20/09/2009 22:50

she's being treated for depression and says that her counsellor recommends that she use weed to even out her days...????

I've spoken to her but she says she can make £100+ per day and she is almost through the process.

Surely they ask somewhere on the application is you have any illness or ongoing mental health issues?

OP posts:
paddingtonbear1 · 20/09/2009 22:51

oh dear, this must be difficult but yanbu at all to voice your concerns. have you spoken to her about it?

BoysArrLikeDogs · 20/09/2009 22:51

She may well be turned down by OFSTED - her medical form will have details about her medical history from her GP; she may therefore be found to be not a suitable person.

I don't think that you can tell OFSTED until her application has been submitted - they cannot take action until they receive an application

YANBU to be concerned

LuluMamaaaaarrrrr · 20/09/2009 22:51

it all sounds very bad, being depressed, having panic attaks, using weed daily and being in denial about the impact it will have on her professionl life is scary

valhala · 20/09/2009 22:52

I know of a Nanny who is much the same as the OPs person. Problem is I only know her first name and the street she lives in - is there anything I can do with such scant detail. I feel a real b for even thinking of reporting it - shes a nice girl who has gone through hell in her personal life and adores her job as well as being very good with kids.

But, she drives them about when stoned (she smokes dope as others smoke B&H), she has sole care and I know it isn't right for the children, although I feel like I would sound just horribly morally superior.

paddingtonbear1 · 20/09/2009 22:53

My friend used to be a childminder but I don't think she made £100+ per day!

Danthe4th · 20/09/2009 22:55

OMG there is a specific question which asks if you use drugs but not sure if it was ion the cm forms or the crb check, but I remember it being asked, actually I think it was on the ofsted form. If she does get through the initial ofsted inspection where they inspect to see the house and interview the cm, then I would definately report to ofsted. you could do this online or ring up, but you must.

Original poster
Ronaldinhio · 20/09/2009 22:56

The thing is she's kind of losing touch with anything real...using psychics as much as her counsellor.
Far from sure that her GP is aware of her weed usage as she is also taking tricyclics.

What a bloody mess

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 20/09/2009 22:59

Would the Ofsted inspector smell it when they walk into the house?

RealityIsNOTDetoxing · 20/09/2009 23:05

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