in not letting my 17 year go to magaluff next year

[DollyPS]

I am not letting her go as I have heard horror stories of the ruddy place and she will be under age for drinking any way. No other adults will be going with them and there will be 16 of them all girls all 17 or 18 at the time the go.

We are not talking because I said NO to her well tough I stand by what I said.

Hello, yes a 17 year old can book a holiday as long as there is at least one 18 year old travelling. The 18 year olds assume resposibility for the under 18's. Anyone under 16 travelling without their parents need to provide written consent to travel from their parents, even with another 18 year old travelling.

In theory, but some will jsut book them anyway.

Oh and I went to Magaluf a few years ago with 2 friends. None of us had sex or did any drugs, we just went on trips during the day and got very drunk and danced all night. Good clean fun.

I went to Holland when I was 15, 16 and 17 three years in a row!

Having just come back from living there again, and have done so over the last 20 years on and off, I would no way allow my 17 yo DD to go there . NO WAY .
My 22 YO was on a night out there 3 weeks ago and was injured by a flying chair in the street at 9pm .. it can be very volatile and trouble can kick off at any time even if your DD were to keep a low profile so to speak .. though I truthfully fail to see how a group of about 16 girls travelling together would be keeping a low profile !
IMVHO YANBU TBH there is a lot more goes on there than you see in the papers back here.. stand by what you said ..

Babbi. To be hit by a flying chair in the street is just plain unlucky. I'm sure that could happen in most busy night spots if trouble kicks off! Whether your dd was 22 or 17 would have had no bearing on whether she got hit by the chair!

Anywhere can be volatile, trouble can start anywhere. I have been to Magaluf and work in the travel industry - I do know what it's like and I'd probably be a bit if my (hypothetical) 17 yr old wanted to go there I'd not try and stop them.

Adults need to make heir own decisions, make some mistakes and be responsible for themselves - 17 is a great age to start that.

YANBU
a holiday with a couple of friends to somewhere interesting, where drinking and clubbing is not the main thing to do, is one thing, but 16 teenage girls in magaluf - no way. I wouldn't allow my 17 year old to go. Until she is 18 and paying for it herself you get to veto stuff like that.

i would suggest somewhere else or suget a festival. you know her best and therefore your decision is probably right.

i wouldn't let my daughter go to a place like that - however i would let her go somewhere else - depending on the holiday.

I wouldn't fund it, if she wanted to go she'd have to work to get the money. And I'd make it very clear what the risks were. Probably wouldn't go for an outright ban though.

Unfortunately we can't stop children making mistakes, just be there to pick up the pieces.

YANBU. I wouldn't allow a 17 year old to go even if she says she'll pay, She is under 18 and counted as a minor.

If she is 18 she can go and you can't do anything about it. I would however tell her if she wants to go at 18 she needs to pay for it all herself and you won't give her a penny towards it so she best get a weekend job.

I worked at sainsbury's during my final year at school to pay for my holiday after A-levels and went to Barbados for 2 weeks - was best holiday ever as it was the first one i had paid for all on my own and loved every minute of it. worked double shifts on weekends to earn the money and worth every penny!

Similar situation with mine, she wants to do a post GCSE holiday with a group of girls but they will only be 16! They have realised it might be difficult to book without an adult so have asked me to come but not hold their hands iyswim!

I said I would next year but tbh when they hit a year older I would be happy for her to go without me.

So yes YABU.

Also I don't think it is underage drinking at 17 in spain.

I went to magaluf when I was 20 with a boyfriend. We did a couple of clubs but it wasn't that wild. Mind you that was a good few years ago now.

YABU. My father tried to forbid me doing stuff like this at that age and kept saying as he supported me financially, he had the final say. Let's just say that one day, when I'd had enough, I packed my bags, moved out of home, got a job to support myself, sorted out the new school I was going to and never looked back. I was 17.

If she doesn't have the money to undertake the trip of her own accord, then fine - it's your decision what your own money pays towards. If, on the other hand, she does have the money, then there's little you can do (legally) to stop her from going.

All you can do is try to convince her otherwise or threaten sanctions if she doesn't do as she is told. TBH, I don't see what sanctions you could use other than that she won't be allowed back into your home if she goes against what you have decided. Just be careful if you take that stance - she just may take you up on it and never come back. That's what I would have done.

To those that say she is a minor, someone's already mentioned it but I'll slip in a little reminder - once you are over the age of 16, you can do anything you want (even in this country) the same as an 18 year old except:

1. Smoke (minimum age of 18)
2. Drink in public areas (minimum age of 18)
3. Buy alcohol (minimum age of 18)
4. Drive (minimum age of 17)
5. Get married without your parents' permission (minimum age of 18) [but you can get married with their permission from the age of 16]
6. Vote (minimum age of 18)
7. Buy knives (minimum age of 18)

If your daughter took herself off to Magaluf without your permission and you went to the police, they would laugh in your face tell you there was little they could do unless you could prove that she was taken there against her will.

Long story short, choose your battles carefully. I think the best way to approach this is to

1. Explain to her that you are worried about her taking such a holiday and would prefer for her no to go
2. Explain that if she does decide to go, there is little you can do to stop her but you will not pay anything towards the cost of the holiday and she should meet this herself to show that she can be responsible
3. Explain to her the risks involved in going on such a holiday and how she can stay safe and protect herself
4. Insist that if she does get the money together and decides to go, she must agree to contact you at a specific time each day so that you know she is safe and well.

Treat her like a reasonable adult and hope that she will respond likewise. Teenagers don't react well to ultimatums but most will respect you if you respect them (regardless of how the media likes to portray all of them as feral weasels).

I think i would say no, if there is any trouble/problems she cant just jump in a taxi home! She is underage drinking, this is illegal! Just because "they all do it" doesnt make it right.
My friends daughter at 19 went to ibiza, got so drunk she ended up in hospital another girl in the group was almost raped (her so called friends forgot about her and left her in a club)