...for being concerned about my weight (don't read if you have weight issues)...

[nybom]

i'm 5.8 and have always weighed around 55 kg, never more than 59, even after having my first DC. i've never dieted and i eat whatever i want.

after the birth of second DC my weight was in the normal range (58), but the last half year (he is just over 1 year old now), my weight has gone up by a stone!!! (64kg), and for the first time in my life i FEEL fat.

it is horrible - i don't fit into half my trousers, i've got a flabby stomach if i sit down and i've stopped wearing shorts or skirts higher than kneelength.

i've started limiting certain food (i usually have all chocolate, crisps, cream, cheese, alcohol almost every day), so, say, i will have a glass of wine less, or not eat crisps AND chocolate every day but only one or the other. i think my calorie intake is at least 3000 a day, but i'm still BF and hungry! also, i probably have about 7 portions of fruit and veg a day, i only drink water, so my diet is pretty balanced and healthy, well, apart from the quantities and the treats...

i know many women would wish they had my problems but to me it feels like a problem because i never had to worry about my weight.

does anybody have the same "problem", and can someone please tell me that i'm YABU!

I could have writted the op
I'm 5' 7" and I have sudden;y gained a stone that I;ve never had before
totally gutted

I'm 31

have 3 girls and I';m still feeding gecko

Its really upset me
I'm always been 9 stone 7 and now I'm 10 stone 7
without having done anything different
gutted

but notyummy
she isn't doing this purely looking at 'healthy' bmi

she just wants to be the look and feel she is used to

I think it has a lot to do with what is normal for you and how you are built. Some people are just built like birds, with very thin delicate wrists etc. I'm 5'7 and I start to look unhealthily thin at 9 1/2 stone, but I know others who are much lighter and look (and feel, more importantly) perfectly healthy.

I agree with someone further up that exercise is probably a good way to sort this out OP, especially if you are really hungry from BFing. Muscle sort of burns calories just by being there, plus it's a good habit to get into.

I have exceedingly thin wrists
even when 12 stone and pregnant my wrists are still scarily thin

Can understand someone wants to look simlar to how they did prechildren (most of us do - unless we had a worse body before!)

Can't understand upsetting yourself over not being a weight that wasn't ideal in the first place.

Lots of people were skinny in their 20s because they lived an unhealthy lifestyle/didn't eat regularly/smoked etc

Surely health and a 'healthy weight' are the main things that anyone should aim to be for themselves and their children. If you then want your body to look better at your healthy weight then exercise and toning could be a great step.

Half the people in the these stupis f**king magazines are a completely UHhealthy weight and otherwide sensible adults think its a good way to look.

BTW -I am not saying that you should let yourself go/not care about your appearance etc, or that being overweight is OK - it's not and its equally unhealthy.

Surely the best way to bring up your kids to have a healthy view of themselves is not striving to be slightly underweight? It's eating healthily and taking exercise?

i had my first daugher at 21 and pinged back to shape no problem. Never had to worry about my weight/size,was tall and skinny with big tits all through my twenties ate,drank and made merry(and by that i mean had work dinners/lunches daily and NEVER went to the gym)
on my 30th birthday I weighed 9stone2 (I am 5'10 and was toned and pert-i have no idea how
fast forward to 32nd birthday,same lifestyle/diet-12 and a half stone.
Had another baby at 35-breastfed her,still hovering around 12.5 stone.Got big fat arms,a big fat face,my thighs which used to be like rock have fat,my belly wobbles,my breasts look like tesco carrier bags filled with water.
I am embarassed that I have let myself end up like this-i think i am going to have to give in and hit weightwatchers and the gym as i hate being 'jolly'
i think it's age.

notyummy - 55 weight was definitely a healthy for me: i looked healthy, i felt healthy, i was healthy. i simply have small bones and a quick metabolism. btw, thyroid has always been ok.

5 years ago i developed coeliac desease. my weight went down to 51kg. that was too low, even for me. it looked unhealthy, but i still got my periods, so it can't have been as bad as it might have been for another person. anyway, my normal range is 55-59.

i don't think building up fat around the midriff is any healthier than being a light 55kg, even, if on paper 64kg is a good weight for someone 5.8 tall. my body fat percentage is too heigh, again, not in general but for my height and size...

i agree notyummy but I'm talking about this weight I want to be has only changd in the last 2 months or so
after each of my three children I returned to it no problem wihtout doing a thing

I'm the same height as you and in the first 6 months of this year went from 55kg to 65 - same as you I'd never had to think about my weight before and had stayed pretty toned.
I think from what you say you're right just to be cutting down, but also don't forget how important it is to exercise. If you're losing a little bit of weight things won't get any tighter or firmer if you're not toning them - plenty of walking and the best possible thing is swimming if you can face it! I started trying to tone up at the start of this month and have dropped 2kg so far. Good luck!

I think the answer is to eat a healthier diet. A diet high in saturated fat will take it's toll, even if you are slim.
I am 7 stone and short with a small frame and I have always eaten a lot. After I had children though I did make a bit effort to eat more healthily. I still have the odd treat and eat huge portions but I try to make it big portions of healthyish food.

nynom - I accept your feelings about what was a healthy weight for you - and that weight around the middle is not a healthy place to carry it. Hopefully exercise and haelthy eating may help you shift it - although perhaps not down to 55kg though? Life is too short to be hung up on a particular number (says notyummy who has already quoted her 'ideal weight )

I have said it already - but will say it agin. Body fat is calculated as a % - therefore your height and weight HAVE NO BEARING on it!!!! A healthy percentage is the same whether you are 4 ft 11 or 6 ft 4 - the only variations are to do with gender and age. At your age 25% is a good % - the fat may not be where you want it (midriff), and your muscles may not be toned underneath, thereby not looking as good as you want.

I have a similar % body fat, which I know to be healthy. I carry most of hit on backside/thighs and would love a different shape (perhaps move some up to the boobs) but I know that this is my body shape, and starving myself will result in the same SHAPE, just slightly smaller measurements. The only way you can change your shape is through exercise (or surgery I guess).

3 things strike me

1. When I was bf I was so hungry and I definitely ate too much, was just always ravenous. I put on weight while bf and it mostly came off when I stopped and my appetite reduced.

1. Sat fat is the thing to look out for - a (male) colleague of mine designed his own diet where he just stopped or really cut down eating things that were high in sat fat. He lost 2 stone but nice and slowly so no yo-yoing.

1. Pilates and yoga are fab for toning up. I am reasonably happy with my weight but not my flab. I am slowly getting more tone back in arms, legs, bum, tummy from doing a class that's a mixture of yoga and pilates.

I am heavier than you but I had the same thing after having dc1, suddenly I was a stone heavier.

nybom - I am not deliberately getting your name wrong all the time. It's just ineptitude - sorry!

If you're alreay excercising,(which I think you said you were? ) it can be good to vary your exercise - ie "shock" your body. so try doing different types of exercise, or, if you like running, make an effort to do more than just go for a 30 minute jog. Run for 45 minutes one day. Or, do 30 minutes but sprint for a minute, jog gently for a minute.

When I've spoken to PT at the gym, they alway say that for weight loss that "shock" to the body by doing interval training, combiined with building up muscle is the best way to lose weight.

I'm working on it myself in fact. And do find that although I tend to only exercise for 30 minutes 2 or maybe 3 times a week, it does definitely have more of an impact than just food watching by itself.

missing the action - haven't used fluoride toothpaste for about 10 years. Why do you ask?

(Sorry hadn't looked back here for a while)

nybom

I'm like this. Would love to suit being a size 12 but I look v fat at this size. Far fatter and out of shape than friends who are much bigger. It doesn't go on evenly and I just get fat face and blob round the middle. I don't go curvy. Just lumpy

None of my clothes fit (normally size 8 -10) so I'm eating less and going the gym.