in not allowing MIL to give my baby arnica?

[iamaLeafontheWind]

She's a lovely MIL, but I don't eally believe in all the alternative stuff. DD is only 11 months & had bumped her head, MIL was very insistant about giving her some arnica. Both me & DH had to be quite firm about it & I think we hurt her feelings. AIBU? or overly PFB?

Arnica and steroid creams are incomparable.

well that certainly wasn't me

is this really about arnica or are their other issues of control and adherence to wishes.if you dont share her belief in "alternative" therapies then you are within your rights to tell her,and expect her to adhere to your preference. is your worry that she will continue regardless

look, your baby you need to be ok with anything applied topically. BUT i suppose dont exclude a loving granny over this,do try resolve and compromise.

My MIL is an actual homeopath and I am a total cynic so you can imagine how awkard that was at first, especially when it came to DS having his immunisations....

Anyway, I have to say that on a couple of occassions I have conceded and used some of the stuff she has sent us and it has worked. I hate to admit it because I've been saying it's a load of bollocks for years.

If you're not comfortable giving the homeopathic remedies to your child then you definately shouldn't. I know that I've upset my MIL in the past by not following her suggestions but my theory was that whilst she's a grown woman and can probably take it, my baby has no say in the matter so it was up to me and DH to decide what's best for him. Over time, I changed my mind and decided to give it a go but it was a last resort, ie when calpol wasn't keeping his temp. down or relieving the teething pain etc.

HTH

WTF? Calpol isn't a cure-all; it's a paracetomol or ibuprofen suspension. There's been suggestions that over use is linked to asthma. I use it when ds has a temperature, because that's riskier. I also use it when he's in a lot of pain, because costs/benefits. But to suggest a sugar pill is more potentially harmful than a drug that is a serious suicide risk, such as paracetomol, is... odd.

my point wasn't about the weirdness of honey, it was the thought of handing my coughing bubba a spoonful of raspberry jam with pips

The nhs recommends taking arnica for post birth healing (example here) so it must be seen to have some benefit

That isn't exactly a recommendation, though, is it? It says: "There is no research to say which methods are most effective, but some women find that ice packs, warm baths, and herbal remedies such as calendula cream or arnica can be helpful."

Having said that, arnica apparently has mild analgesic and anti-inflammatory properties. And herbal remedies can be pretty potent - opium and cannabis definitely work, after all!

Hi Qally, wasn't saying it's more harmful than using calpol or that calpol is a cure all. Just that I was more comfortable using calpol for pain relief and temps than relying on the homeopathic remedies. Now I've seen them working I'm more likely to use them than before but I can understand why the OP would be reticent to give her baby something she's not familiar with. I've re-read my post and it sounds really anti-alternative therapies. I'm not, was just empathising with being in that situation where you're at odds with the MIL about what's best for your baby.

Noo, sorry Hairymelons, I wasn't meaning you (in fact I agree; I have no faith in homeopathy at all, though I also believe it to be harmless so don't have any issue with someone trying it on DS). Someone else earlier in the thread said that Calpol was a cure-all alongside kisses and an ice compress, or something along those lines, and I was a bit - huh? because, while Calpol is fantastic with an ill child, it's also a drug. Paracetomol is dangerous, if over used. Using it as a placebo is a bit worrying on that basis. I'd far rather use a little baby lotion on a bump than dole out Calpol.

Wow, thanks for all the replies (although not really a consensus so still a bit confused).

It was tablets she was offering, not cream (I think).

TBH I limit the use of Calpol too unless essential.

YANBU, your child your rules, end of story.