to think that my friends are making a rod for their own backs?

[welshone51]

I have two very good friends who are lovely generous people, they have a 19 month old daughter who they naturally adore. They are loving, caring parents who want the best for their only daughter.
However I have noticed in the past that they tend to give in to their daughter quite a lot.
I especially noticed it on a recent holiday with them as they tended to allow their daughter to make a lot of the decisions regarding her own care for example they ask her if she wants to go to bed, have a bath, go in her pram, get dressed e.t.c and if the child says no which she often does then she doesnt have to do these things often resulting in her going to bed at midnight, not being bathed regularly, being carried everywhere and not even having her raincovers on in torrential rain.
I am not saying I am the perfect parent at all but just feel frustrated that they are being led a merry dance by their little one. I am unsure whether they do this due to convieniance or because they dont want to upset her but I feel that they are giving their tiny daughter too many choices which may led to problems in the future. Im just wondering what other peoples opinions are on this -feel free to tell me to butt out and to mind my own!!

as others have said yanbu to think it but you would be to say it

i have lots of friends and family with kids, we all do it differently, and there are things my friends / sil's do which i think are bonkers, but its what they do - some are more strict, some are more laid back, all depends on the individual

holidays are dificult - we haven't gone with friends but have with family, and when you are organised and ready to go out for the day at 10 and your chaotic rellies are still messing about and holding you up because they are not as control freakish! its infuriating - we tend to just go on ahead and meet up later to avoid conflict, also our ds is terrible sleeper even at 2 so we are religious about bedtime routine as its the only way we can keep things on track, this means we can't be that flexible about evening meals and going out in the evening on holiday - this must be annoying for other people - but since they won't be the ones having to spend a month post holiday getting their child to sleep through again while struggling through work I don't really give a toss - but I am sure behind closed doors there will be comment about how ridgid i am about that

everyone goes to the devil their own way ....

Should add we never pander to our children to detriment of others and the idea of going on hol with another family frankly sounds hellish. It is hard enough work with my own children let alone anyone elses!