We have been living with ILs while we get ourselves sorted out with a new house for the past month. DP works full time and I stay at home looking after DD and being pregnant. I also have been signed off work due to mental health problems. I have been saving up my benefits for the past month, although i have been paying all the bills (£500 for the final gas/leccy bill from our old house, various costs for getting straight with the old internet company, storage costs etc), I thought this was on the understanding that DP was also saving his wages for the rent on our new house.
We signed for our new house last week, and as FIL was kindly lending us the deposit, he also stuck the first months rent on his card so we could pay him back. Today I asked DP for the money to pay his dad back. The rent is £525. He said he could probably manage to give me £80, and maybe another £180 tomorrow when he gets paid. When I questioned this (hissing quietly as FIL was in the next room) he said he thought the tax credits (which go into my account) were enough to cover the rent and that I was paying the bills. How on earth he expects me to pay the bills and feed all of us on Child Benefit and £180 a month DLA I have no idea!
When I said I would deal with the bills I meant using the tax credits, which I see as my "wage" for looking after DD and running the house. Generally we pretty much share money, eg when out shopping whoever happens to have their card handy pays. I tend to deal with the bill as I am at home all day to be on hold with the bills companies (in our last house I'm pretty sure he didn't even know how much our bills were!)
what gets me is that DP has been out at work nearly every day for the past month, so he has somehow managed to spend all that money without having anything to show for it. His ONLY cost is £15 a week for a bus pass and maybe lunch the odd time he forgets to take a packed one. Am I going to have to take his wage off him and give him spends? yet every time I buy anything he doesn't see as "essential" (recent examples have included a toilet training seat for DD and a dress for me from primark as I only had one dress my bump would fit into and it was too hot for jeans) I get a lecture off him about how we have to tighten our belts and not go spending on frivolous things.
I'm pretty sure the money has gone on beer due to his habit of taking up to two hours to make the fifteen minute journey home from work or saying he is nipping to the shop for milk and a paper and staying out all evening.
GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!