To speak up about the cheaters at work?

[DillyDollyDandy]

Whilst on a 10 day trip abroad with 25 colleagues, I and everyone else watched as two people in our group flirted mercilessly with eachother quite blatantly, and ended up spending a night together and getting in with eachother. They both had partners waiting for them at home.

I ran into both partners yesterday morning, and sure as hell told them both about their cheating other-halfs. One couple has split up and I don't know about the other yet.

I'm now public enemy number one of my workplace because one of the cheaters is in my office, and he's much more popular than me, and I've been stigmatised as a 'meddler' and generally bitched about like mad. Only one person had the guts to confront me to my face - one of my exes, and also the cheating guy's best friend - and he said that it was none of my business and I've made a lot of people upset.

I'VE made a lot of people upset?? Surely the cheating is what made them upset, as opposed to the fact that the information came from me personally?? Everyone else who saw it happen was just going to turn a blind eye, and whilst I'm not particularly close to either of the cheated partners, I do know them, and seeing them just carry on obliviously seemed very wrong, and vaguely revolting to me, they have a right to know that their other half is a liar.

As for it not being my business - I saw it happen, the nature of 'it' being something I heavily disagree with, that's enough to make it 'my business'. They're not pissed off at me they're pissed off they got caught, and mad at themselves for not factoring into the equation that one
person may NOT be spineless enough to just cowardly say 'it's not my business' and look the other way.

But of course the pack mind has occured, majority vote wins, and it just shows up my colleagues for being the superficial, fake people that they are. I went to work and got loads of filthy looks, but not a word out of anyone. Deep down they KNOW I did the right thing. They just won't admit it 'cos then that makes them look bad for not doing something, when I did.

Although it's not pleasant being bitched about profusely, I don't regret it at all. I was the only person brave enough to do what's right despite the obvious consequences, when everyone else was gonna not say anything.

What do you think?

this poster has stolen one of my many MN personae (personas ?)

I used to post under the monicker "getmeouttahere" and I do not wish to be mistaken for this fuckwit

I thangyew

Haha - yes, Mavis!

If what the OP says is to be believed (which I doubt) then I suspect she enjoyed telling the partners what she thought had gone on far more than she was concerned for their feelings or need to know.

I don't think their feelings got a look in otherwise she'd have given a lot more thought about what she was doing and why she was doing it rather than rushing in head first.

Don't feed the troll!

And exactly what good have you done by your actions? Except keep your own strangely viewed conscience clear?

What a crock of shit

wonders again why i clicked on this crap thread
think i might turn off the computer.

OMG, you will be hated forever...even the people who you tried to 'help' will want to slap you.
No social skills, that's your problem, better go work somewhere by yourself.
You sound too much like my brother

If the other half asked you if you saw anything happen and you told them then that would definately be ok and it would have been made 'your business'.

I'm really not sure about what you did though, although I understand your reasons to some extent. I'm certainly not suggesting that it is ok to cheat but you have forced the whole situation. The other halfs now know that not only did their partner cheat but also everyone else knows about it.

It WAS their partners who humiliated them like this but you have now ensured that they feel humiliated to the point where the couple may be less likely to be able work though this. I am sure a lot of happy and successful partnerships have had infidelity in the past, that are best kept there. I know that if my husband was unfaithful to me on a business trip (as a one-off) I would actually NOT want to know, and I certainly wouldn't want to know that all his colleagues know about it! If was a full-blown affair then I would want to know, but I would probably have suspicians then anyway.

so YABU

Some journalists might be shagging each other all over the place. I couldn't possibly comment. But one thing they are definitely NOT doing is going on ten day jollys abroad with 25 colleagues.

Once again I can smell bullsh*t

You had no right to tell anyone, sorry! You should have spoken to the 2 involved & told them what you knew. Given them a chance to sort it.

You have NO idea what is going on in their personal lives.