AIBU to think our school office staff .....

[MissSunny]

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My two eldest kids were NEVER ever late for school. I was a bit smug about it all. They used to get certificates and everything. I would be frantic if I thought they were going to be a second late.

Then life happened to us in a great big way. So my DS2 has been late a few times. He probably will be late a few more times. I dont get upset about it anymore. I would rather get him there on time and believe punctuality is very important but shit stuff happens.

YANBU in that they should not be rude or judgy. YAB a bit U if you think all reception staff are like that.

When I was ringing around schools to get an appointment to view 9for my DS's reception place), I was shcoked at how bloody rude, unaccomodating and generally jobsworthy most of them were. The office staff at the school we put as first choice - and the one we thankfully got a place at - are lovely. Makes such a difference to the fell of the school ifthe front of house people have got basic manners and are helpful.

A hell of a lot of parents treat the school office staff like crap because they aren't "important" like teachers.

Being late disrupts the entire class.

Why was the pe kit so vital that weekend?

She didn't apologise because she got given "the look". Perhaps she would have done otherwise, who knows. Perhaps she wouldn't have and she's a yobbo, we don't know.

The thing is, if you look down on someone who has screwed up, you don't give them a chance to apologise and make amends - you change the dynamics of a situation, which is exactly what happened here - I don't see how the passive aggressive look and shake helped there, it irritated the OP and she stropped off. That may be unreasonable of her, but I honestly don't think this way of treating people is conducive to co-operative behaviour and I don't know why people are arguing that it's a Good Thing. It's a horrible way for us all to be acting.

As a general rule when parents are asked a reason for lateness (so that it can go in the register, NOT to judge) they immediately get on the defensive.

some school office staff are complete cowbags

some parents are complete cowbags

Hell, even some mumsnetters are complete cowbags

Thats life! get over it

I think I understand what everyone is saying about lateness and it being marked on the register because of the law and washing your PE kit and taking it back and stuff. I really do.

But I'm struggling to understand what on earth that has to do with admin staff and why they should take it upon themselves to tell folk off.

Our school office staff are approachable and friendly. Very nice bunch of people. But I've seen even them react negatively to a mother who came in late for the 5th time that week. And I don't blame them.

Sorry, I thought teachers took the register..

Great posts Trefusis. Aswell as being a receptionist I am also the attendance clerk and it sounds like my job is very similar to yours. I am actively encouraged by our EWO (wag man) to be disapproving towards parents whose children are late, to hopefully put them off being late again!

Teachers do take the register but inevitably it is the office staff who mop up the latecomers. I don't think parents realise how complicated it is. In our school we have an electronic register with about 10 different codes for absence, all of which must be correctly used (for legal reasons) and the whole thing must be complete at 9am, at which point statistics are produced for the senior staff. It is one of the most stressful aspects of the early morning at school and I don't envy for one minute the member of the office staff who deals with it!

Also, to the OP, no-one can 'make' you feel bad. If you were confident that you were completely in the right, you would just shrug this off and not get cross about it, surely?!

Well the teachers will take the register in class. But that is a simple tick box task. When the registers go back to the office staff, it is they who have to collate the information, tally up sickness absences versus lateness, keep note of the fact that if a child is late they are nonetheless in the school building though they will have been marked absent by the teacher (incredibly important for fire safety). All that stuff. And they do need to know why you are late as it needs to be recorded.

WRT fire safety - I was once in the reception area when the fire alarm went off and was incredibly impressed to see the procedure. Twas like clockwork, with the first thing being done by the office staff being to grab the trolley with the registers and speed outside so that they could run through the accurate registers and make sure all children out and well.

And also the office staff work from the register to decide who is having school lunches, coordinate with the canteen and so on. All of which is made trickier when people roll up late.

I'm not saying that individuals cannot be grumpy or cross or jobsworth. But in the case of school office staff, they IMO have a fair amount to be jobsworth about - they're behind the scenes trying to assist in the smooth running of the school and any hint of "attitude" from parents (along the lines of them being dismissive of the importance of their role) might grate, particularly by Friday morning.

How late were you?

NO one can be criticised in thsi world it seems

Oh I don't give a fuck. School office staff generally live up their stereotype - bit like doctor's receptionists. Always narky and act as if they are the only ones in the world with a mildly stressful job.

Suck it up (sorry Americanism haters).

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So you post in AIBU and then get completely defensive over being defensive when some of the more 'perfect' mumsnetters don't agree with you. MissSunny me arsehole, more like MissDampand dreary!!

if somebody is late you just give them a letter about that.
you dont need to look down on them and upset them and i think thats very wrong.
the office staff may have very stressful job, but every job has some stressful aspects, thats why they are paid.
being stressed is not a reason to look down on people.
office staff are very important for a school i think.
even if the teachers and head teacher, everything is perfect, a rude office staff can put you off from a school.

they dont have a right to look down on people.

YOU WASH THEIR PE KIT ONCE A TERM?

I knew I was having too much kit to wash - my kitbags per week for washing are never less than 8 - more in winter. The winter term goes like this:

Indoor PE kit x2
Swimming kit x3
Rugby kit x1
Cricket (club) kit x1
Tennis kit x2
Hockey kit (one is club night) x2

Every farking week. I spend my life sorting out kitbags.