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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be absolutly shocked and livid about a father forgetting his child

91 replies

thesockmonsterofdoom · 12/06/2009 10:21

This morning at school, I was leaving school thisd morning and my dd2's best friend (4yo) was sat on a bench in the school yard crying. I asked him what was wrong and he told me that his daddy had left him. Now I assumed he was hiding around a corner or something, after waiting with the little boy for 5 mins I was starting to panic, I didnt want to take him off the school premises to look for his dad, some other friends walked past so i asked them to have a look where the dad was parked ( about 3 streets away) and let me know if he was there. Well they call a couple of minutes later and the dad was there, he was just about to drive off, he had actuyally forgotten hisd son. He came running back and I handed over his son and walked off as tbh I darent talk as I didnt know what would come out of my mouth.
I can not believe that you can actually forget your child for what turned out to be about 15minutes and he still wouldnt have remembered if friends had not knocked on car window.
His wife is a friend of mine and I am desperatley hoping him or little boy will tell her what happened as I dont really want to have to.
What if I hadnt walked by, someone else may not have known who he was. What if he had decided to go after his dad and cross several busy roads to find him.
I am really quite angry.

OP posts:
thesockmonsterofdoom · 13/06/2009 08:47

How mnay dc I have is completley irrelevant anbd quite a hurtful and patronising question tbh.

OP posts:
fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 13/06/2009 08:50

I don't think you can be angry at someone for forgetting, which is not intentional, only if he deliberately left the child there. I'm sure he felt terrible.

trefusis · 13/06/2009 09:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

purepurple · 13/06/2009 09:05

yabu
this happens all the time
I work in a nursery and it happens quite often
the best was one child left at the end of the day. The manager lives onsite and took him home an hour and a quarter after the nursery closed to find both parents at home eating tea with the other kids.
Don't really know where they thought their child was!

bubblagirl · 13/06/2009 09:07

i think its terrible to see a child so upset but we all at some stage have or will forget our child

i have in supermarket walked over to drinks continued going feeling id forgotten something my pushchair containing my child left by the papers i felt awful but no one called me awful names they laughed and said we've done this too

my partner had also done this as never used to having a child with him but i didnt shout or scream at him he didnt get too far before he realised i was obviously relieved he didnt get too far but i know how easy it is especially if sleep deprived or depressed rushing around

lots of people think they'd never do that but at some stage i think we all would have and would be awful to be called terrible names as you feel bad enough in yourself

smudgethepuppydog · 13/06/2009 10:06

I did the same thing to DS when he was little, dropped DD at school and walked off leaving DS behind playing happily in the nursery playground. Didn't remember him until another mum caught up with me and told me and asked if someone was missing.

He's 17 now and hasn't suffered any lasting damage.

Thandeka · 13/06/2009 10:20

My dad was once an hour late to pick us up- school were phoning round everywhere and my mum was at work and trying to get a taxi to pick us up and take us to her when my finally dad stauntered up- he had been in France the week before and the car clock was the wrong time- he was looking very chuffed with himself he was on time! ha.

Would have been fine if he hadn't done again a year or so later! But that time he was only half an hour late as he saw the crossing ladies and that jogged his memory!

TheLadyEvenstar · 13/06/2009 10:37

My Mum left my sister in her pram outside a shop for 1 1/2 hours. before she remembered her. when she was a tiny baby she only remembered because my Nan said "Wheres the baby" when she got home. Mum returned to the shop and sister was still where she had left her asleep.

Her Cousin left her tiny baby outside in the garden all night in her pram. And only remembered when her dad came home from work early hours of the morning and brought her indoors.

Mind you this was in 1968.....Just goes to show people do forget...

purepurple · 13/06/2009 13:27

Ladyevenstar, that's so funny!
leaving a baby out all night, she would get arrested today

my mum left my sister outside the shop in her buggy and came home on her own too, only realising when she got back home!

Pan · 13/06/2009 13:36

crumbs. HE left a child in the school by mistake, and you see it as your job to ensure his wife know?
Is the service of being everyone's conscience and guardian extended to everyone in the world??

TheLadyEvenstar · 13/06/2009 13:52

Pure, I always laugh when mum tells me. They were both 21 when my sister and cousin were born, living at home still THANKFULLY!!! if not for uncle and Nan they would both probably still be there lmao actually both are in their 40's now. and mum and cousin in their 60's.

Mum dropped me when I was born....mind you she had been under to have an emergency c section and that meant she was still 90% asleep when they gave me to her.

hatwoman · 13/06/2009 13:53

a friend of ours came running back to the school gate the other morning at five past 9. he'd got home and realised he'd left the dog

should we report him?

Ronaldinhio · 13/06/2009 14:02

my mum left me at the shops when I was little. Got home and had the nagging sensation she'd forgotten something, checked her list etc... nope it was me...still parked outside the shops in my pram (olden days)
My friends mum left him on the bus

yabu

TheLadyEvenstar · 13/06/2009 14:14

Ronaldinho...LOL your not my sister are you? thats what mum did with her.

Ronaldinhio · 13/06/2009 14:17

I don't think so...

tootyflooty · 13/06/2009 15:24

my mil left my husband ( he was a baby at the time !!) in the pram outside the shop, she didn't realise she had forgotten him until she got home. I did a similar thing when I was a child frequently, only it was my bike that i had left behind, obviously not quite as serious as leaving a child behind.
I also arranged to collect a friends child from school with mine, I didn't remember until I saw my friend walking towards my house and then had a panic as I had forgotten to collect her dd. she was 9 and had just gone to wait in the school office, my friend was very understanding and said it wasn't the first time someone had forgotten !! obviously a little more serious with a preschooler. I would mention it to the mum but not make too big a deal out of it.
she can then put her dh in the doghouse if need be

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