Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

to think that when adults are walking along holding a small childs hand, that they should slow down a bit.

84 replies

sunburntats · 06/06/2009 18:33

This really bothers me.
I see it all the time, the adult walking at normal pace and the little dot almost running along side them.Little legs going 10 to the dozen.

why dont people slow down a bit, i think that it is cruel.

what if it was the adult bieng dragged along twice as fast as thier legs can go? Not pleasant.

Now if there is a cake shop selling the last cake, i would make an exception and would of course be literally running with a little dot in toe, that is different.

OP posts:

MANATEEequineOHARA · 06/06/2009 19:29

I do this too, because I am often in a hurry, ds (7) can keep up and dd (4) usually can. If she can't we negotiate rather than walk slow all the way on her terms. I would think anyone who judges me for that is incredibly pathetic!!!

susiey · 06/06/2009 19:30

I come to a happy medium

I slow down a bit but if we walked at the pace of my 3 yo dd we'd never get to nursery

also if she is being whiney and whingey then I tell her I will make her walk faster / run and that seems to make her stop whinging!

Original poster

sunburntats · 06/06/2009 19:32

no, im talking about tiny tots, little ones, not 4 &6 year olds who are able to keep up and who are able to say slow down if they are struggling.

But thnaks for the name calling, a nice intellegent debate in the making.

OP posts:

Noonki · 06/06/2009 19:35

oh I see it all the time and it's horrible. And that arm yanking thing.

Apparently 100s of children have their elbows pulled so hard that they get strained and end up in a&e

jasper · 06/06/2009 19:36

you need a hobby

Meglet · 06/06/2009 19:36

trying to walk slow is one of my real parenting weaknesses . I walk incredibly fast normally (even when i was heavily pregnant i would be zipping about overtaking people on pavements) so walking at toddler speed nearly kills me. I have to grit my teeth when I walk with 2.6yo ds, he trots along happily but i think my face is probably pretty grumpy. We use the p&t buggy for most trips when we need to be somewhere at a certain time.

I am getting better though, and I certainly don't drag him!

Original poster

sunburntats · 06/06/2009 19:36

OP posts:

TsarChasm · 06/06/2009 19:41

Sometimes life sets the pace. You have to speed up or be 'cruel' and late to collect another dc from somewhere. That wouldn't be nice either.

We used to come out of preschool with exactly 10 minutes to get from there to dd's infant school. The timing was crucial. Sorry and all that...

MANATEEequineOHARA · 06/06/2009 19:43

Was the 'thanks for the name calling' direxted at me!?

JackBauer · 06/06/2009 19:43

Sometimes I do this, sometimes i don't. depends how much of a rush I am in, and I wold not be impressed that people are judging me for rushing with a DD in tow. Like PinkTulips said, if DD1 needs a wee she will still dawdle and i have to rush her.

My mum always use dot walk really fast and we had to walk fast or get left behind, otherwise she would never have got anywhere with the 5 of us, but for some irritating reason she is happy to dawdle with my DD's!

MrsMattie · 06/06/2009 19:45

Cruel? Oh come on! Find something real to worry about. Really.

Twinklenips · 06/06/2009 19:47

FGS, haven't you got anything else to worry about! I agree with Jasper, get a hobby (or walk everywhere reallllllllly slowly to kill some time) and take your judgey knickers off!

Nancy66 · 06/06/2009 19:49

Wow - some very aggressive people on here. Perfectly possible to have a difference of opinion and express it without being hostile.

OP was perfectly polite.

Original poster

sunburntats · 06/06/2009 19:51

wish i had never asked now

OP posts:

CrushWithEyeliner · 06/06/2009 19:51

Totally agree with OP. I see this a lot and I feel rotten for the poor child. But what can you do?

TsarChasm · 06/06/2009 19:52

I think the word 'cruel' was a little ott tbh.

MANATEEequineOHARA · 06/06/2009 19:57

But WAS the 'name calling' directed at me!? Because I didn't??? I just said I would think anyone who judged me for that to be pathetic, and seeing as you then responded saying you meant tiny childrn, that would suggest you are not judging me and I therefore do not think you are pathetic!

JoPie · 06/06/2009 20:05

If I always walked at the pace my 4 year old prefers, it would take me 6 hours to walk around a supermarket, and if I followed his little brother, we would go backwards and stop to look at every single leaf and stone too.

Just because you are hurrying them along doesn't mean you are hurting them or causing them any pain. I think its pretty precious to assume someone is uncaring and cruel for walking a bit quicker. If you have all the time in the world, well for you, some of us don't have that luxury.

bigTillyMint · 06/06/2009 20:09

I walk fast, and my DC have learned to walk fast

I never dragged them, and they both gave up sitting in the buggy by 2 1/2 (and got on their scooters!)
They are fit and well-coordinated.

Did I do something wrong?

barnsleybelle · 06/06/2009 20:15

Sunburn.... I totally agree with you. i hate to see them being pulled along too fast for their little legs to keep up. Goodness me they are meant to dawdle at this age arn't they??? Everything they see on the way is too interesting to be dragged past.

And if your in a rush why not just set off earlier. I give myself tons of time so we can walk at their pace and stare at a stone, or a crack in the pavement if they so wish!

If i am in a rush, i take the buggy.

JackBauer · 06/06/2009 20:15

Sorry, posted too soon. I did mean to say that if you think this is cruel then you are very lucky to not know what actual cruelty is. Unless the child is being physically injured then it isn't cruel.
I walked DD1 back to the car from teh park with her in tears and me rushing her as she had punched her sister in teh face after repeated warnings and I wanted to get DD2 home so I could ice her face. I got a few looks but they didn't know the full story and neither do you.

Original poster

sunburntats · 06/06/2009 20:18

no you didnt do anything wrong at all.

its just an observation,

im just asking you to look next time at thier little face.

They have tiny legs and it IS like you walking next to someone walking 10 times your pace and trying to keep up.

OP posts:

TsarChasm · 06/06/2009 20:18

Setting off earlier isn't always going to be the answer barnsley..

I agree it's not ok to yank little arms but I don't think hurrying up is cruel.

Original poster

sunburntats · 06/06/2009 20:21

And i fully accept that there may be reason for the haste.
BUT what i was asking is why dont people slow down OR even consider the fact that they cant physically keep up.

OP posts:

MrsMattie · 06/06/2009 20:24

I don't think it's 'aggressive' to suggest that the world 'cruel' (along with the word 'abuse') gets bandied about a wee bit too much sometimes on MN. It's just way OTT, imo.

I would never look at a woman marching down the street with a young child in tow and think 'You're cruel'.
('You're busy', maybe....)

I just think that 'cruel' is a slightly barmy thing to say.

Flip

1 2 3 4