AIBU to report this childminder??

[mylifemykids]

There's a childminder who's house backs onto mine. I was just up in the bedroom when I heard one of the children crying in the childminder's garden. I didn't take much notice because there's usually one or other of them crying. Then I heard the childminder say 'X that was really naughty I saw you hit him then, I am very cross with you' and then I heard a slap!!! I looked out the window to see one of the minded children stood there screaming and holding her leg where I assume she was slapped. She was then dragged by the arm inside and told she was going to 'the bedroom' to calm down.

If I'd left my children with a childminder I'd hate to think they were being treated like that.

Do I assume it was just a one off and ignore it? Or should I report her (not sure who to?!)

No, i would not go round to speak to her about it. 1). She may take it the wrong way and be angry. 2). If you do eventually decide to report her, she will have a good idea who has done so.

I still believe that if you were concerned enough to post about it, then you should at least ring ofsted. If she has nothing to answer for then that's great but at least you have took the appropriate steps.

Southmum is right - at least for me. I said don't ruin this woman's career over something that is innocent.

HOWEVER, if you are genuinely concerned with good reason about the welfare of these children, then yes, report her ASAP, because of course the children come first - of course they do.

Offended that scottishmummy thinks any of us would put a career before children who are genuinely at risk

i agree that she should probably be reported but as you didnt see the cm slap/have no proof of it happening then i wouldnt inform ofstead this time, but keep a very beady eye and if need be do a diary of crying/events

no one wants to think that their dc are being cared for by a slapper

children do cry, esp if 2/3 sometimes due to temper tantrums/not wanting ti share etc

if you are worried, you could always bump into mindees and parents as they are leaving and chat to mum - saying you are thinking of using a cm and see what she says about your neighbour ........

where as if you said you SAW the cm slap, then i would say ring ofstead NOW

A single isolated incident when you didn't actually see anything and are only guessing as to what may or may not have happened??

No way would I report this woman, the idea that "if she did nothing wrong she has nothing to worry about" is naive at best. The OP could easily have misinterpreted the situation, and reporting her would likely lose her her livelihood. If she did nothing wrong people will still find out and think no smoke without fire, shes that CM that got investigated, etc etc.

Thats not to say that her career/job/reputation is more important than a childs welfare, but if you really have nothing at all to go on its a huge potential price for her to pay for nothing, isn't it?

genuinely at risk is the apropriate phrase - OP, do you believe this child to be 'genuinely at risk'? If so report it, if not then don't.

By not reporting it you are saving resources that may be better put to use for those children who are genuinely at risk.

I can't help that think that it is likely trhe CM did smack the child if she was capable of speaking to her like that.

the dolly what a very naive comment.

If you are on talking terms with this CM I would mention that it seems like the kids were playing her up this morning and see what she says.

Naive in what respect FBG?

I AM a childminder and actually saw another minded hit a Child in her care.
I rang OFSTED who took a statement and said I must phone SS
I relayed the whole event to SS, who then asked ME, what happens now?!

The minded was visits and she denied it.
End of.

Only good thing was she had to tell parents a complaint had been made, and they ALL removed their kiddies.

She still childminds......

is it a requirement of a CM to inform parents if a complant has been made (genuine question)?

By saying this - dolly

By not reporting it you are saving resources that may be better put to use for those children who are genuinely at risk.

I agree with Dolly here but would go one step further and ask might it be possible, if this person gets reported and (if) it gets dismissed on the basis that the OP didn't actually see the slap, and then the OP does then see an incident and reports it - is it possible that OFSTED might be a bit suspicious of further complaints and perhaps not treat them as seriously? Bit like the boy who cried wolf IYSWIM?

Anyway to the OP - if your mummy-dar is glowing then something has happened for you to feel uneasy. I'm only saying if it were me I would have to be pretty damn sure of what happened before I reported her. However in the meantime I would definitely be taking up camp at my bedroom window with a notepad, some sandwiches, a flask, binoculars and microphone and the instant anything else happened I'd go round there and drag her to OFSTED head offices myself.

so mylifemykids what are going to do.you know what heard

and regards the fact that some are offended.hmmm that is a funny way of seeing this.all that you draw from this debate is your bruised ego and sense i breached good manners

i make no apologies for urging MLMK to report this.this is someone's child

some of the wishy-washy reasons given are appalling and frankly lack any moral fibre

some poster's have saying don't "ruin" cm career.placing the career of the cm as the priority not the child.for fear of damaging her cm career.so in weighing up the options their favoured option was do no harm to cm career. wait for more irrefutable proof

if this was my child i would hope someone with any misgivings would report the cm.

You need to report it but state the exact facts, not your opninion. You didn't hear a slap, you heard a noise.

It's really important that you do report it. If she is innocent (hopefully) she will be pleased that you did what was best for the children. Any good childminder would.

I'm with you on this one scottishmummy.

dolly your emphasis isn't completely accurate

In 2003, the Government published a Green Paper called Every Child Matters alongside the formal response to the report into the death of Victoria Climbié. After a thorough consultation process, the Children Act 2004 became law. This legislation is the legal underpinning for Every Child Matters, which sets out the Government?s approach to the well-being of children and young people from birth to age 19.

The aim of the Every Child Matters programme is to give all children the support they need to:

• be healthy
• stay safe
• enjoy and achieve
• make a positive contribution
• achieve economic well-being.

if any of the aove are breached it is considered an abuse has occured

so on basis of what op wrote imo

• be healthy
• stay safe

have potentially been breached

be health
Physically healthy
Mentally and emotionally healthy
Sexually healthy
Healthy lifestyles
Choose not to take illegal drugs
Parents, carers and families promote healthy choices

Stay safe
Safe from maltreatment, neglect, violence and sexual exploitation
Safe from accidental injury and death
Safe from bullying and discrimination
Safe from crime and anti-social behaviour in and out of school

Southmum - in answer to your question, CM's only need to inform parents if a complaint was upheld and an action raised by an internal or external source.

So if in this case the CM was reported and ofsted investigated (actually as it is an allegation of assault remit gets passed to social services, but ofsted would investigate with regard to welfare requirements and national standards also, so minder would in all probability have two investigations) and they didnt uphold the allegation the minder is not obliged to tell anyone at all and the complaint will not be entered onto the minders public record, although ofsted will have a record of the investigation and outcome on their private files.

My ex friend was a CM and hated one of the little girls in her care. In front of the poor baby who was only 4 she said she looks wierd with her hair hanging in her face and looks like a "spastic". I nearly fainted. The dad of the girl was so nice to the CM aswell, they really trusted her. I sent them an anon letter sly I know but couldn't be arsed with a war, had enough going on. She's not my friend anymore because I could never leave my 2 alone with her after that.

good for you!you did the mum an enormous favour esp as she trusted the cm

Scottishmummy - you are missing the point again. no-one disagrees that if the child is at risk in any genuine way, it should definitely be reported.

Those of us who mentioned the cm's career were simply talking from the possibility that maybe the CM has done nothing wrong, and the OP needs to try to make sure that she doesn't have the wrong end of the stick before reporting it.

However, I think all of us have said that if she really thinks that the child/children in this woman's care are genuinely at risk, she should of course report it ASAP.

So let's leave the personal attacks regarding 'bruised egos' and 'lack of moral fibre' out of it, shall we? And just give the balanced advice that the OP asked for?

i miss no point the dithering here is about the impact upon the CM,much made about impact upon her career

the people who appropriately can determine and assess risk are the sw,that is why they need to be informed of a concern

the duty sw can take a referal discus with senior sw and then they prioritise the referral and the response time accordingly

but the referral needs to be made for them to decide what to do

it could go

referral review No case to answer - no further action

(a) case to answer, further info gathered
(b)investigation no case to answer

but it needs to be referred to go through the process

let ss decide whether or not this warrants further investigation

if nothing found,no case to answer then exactly how is the CM compromised?

And you don't think people will find out and remove their children anyway, even if she is completely cleared?
And that would be ok would it? A woman loses her livelihood because a neighbour heard something that MIGHT have been a slap?

Of course the welfare of a child is more important that a cm's job, but you go on as if her job is of no consequence at all?

The OP saw nothing, doesn't know what happened, and really has no basis for a report anyway.

I'm actually wondering is Scottishmummy is on a different planet thread with her very wrong interpretation of posts on here. For the final time no-one has said the CMs career is more important, you are reading something that blatently isn't there which is really tedious when trying to debate something.

If as Notatwork says (thanks for the reply btw) that if an allegation is not upheld and the CM doesn't have to inform the parents of an investigation then I guess I could agree with the poster above who said the OP should report only the facts (ie she didn't see anything, she only heard a noise etc)

Still don't think I would as I would defo want something concrete to make sure I'm not dismissed as a nosey parker but thats just me.....

Disclaimer - nowhere above does it say the CMs career takes priority

JoPie - I'm also wondering if this is reported and dismisssed, could it affect any further complaints made as in "oh well we know she didn't do anything last time it was a mistake etc" and they may not treat a new claim as seriously.

doesnt work like that southmum referrals have to be investigated fairly.

not oh not you again cant be bothered taking this seriously.you have had you quota of complaints for the year

Bradfordmum outlined a case of a CM who was reported but nothing found to be wrong. However, the parents all removed their kids ANYWAY - CM's career ruined even though the SW found nothing.... (not saying that particular CM was blameless, just using it as an example where no 'charges' were brought, yet the CM lost her career anyway).

CM's livelihood ruined...

CM's own kids' lives disrupted...

Scottishmummy - you are naive if you think that as long as she has done nothing wrong, then nothing bad will come of an investigation. She could be completely innocent and yet still lose all her clients and her livelihood. What if that is her family's main income?? What about the welfare of her kids?? How often do we hear about people having their kids taken away from them only to learn years later that they were innocent??

Again: disclaimer - I am not saying her career is more important than a child in real danger, and if the OP believes this is the case, then she should report it. But it is important - and shouldn't be ruined over something that didn't happen (if it didn't, which none of us know).

Phew - small print on MN posts - whatever next??