AIBU to report this childminder??

[mylifemykids]

There's a childminder who's house backs onto mine. I was just up in the bedroom when I heard one of the children crying in the childminder's garden. I didn't take much notice because there's usually one or other of them crying. Then I heard the childminder say 'X that was really naughty I saw you hit him then, I am very cross with you' and then I heard a slap!!! I looked out the window to see one of the minded children stood there screaming and holding her leg where I assume she was slapped. She was then dragged by the arm inside and told she was going to 'the bedroom' to calm down.

If I'd left my children with a childminder I'd hate to think they were being treated like that.

Do I assume it was just a one off and ignore it? Or should I report her (not sure who to?!)

Even if the CM is slapping her own children, then someone else's children are seeing and hearing it and may be frightened and anxious. That would be reason enough for me.

It needs investigating. Short sharp shock. Also, spy on her. I would

if you heard a couple habitually arguing and suspected domestic violence but saw no physical evidence would you leave it on basis of saw nowt?

if you heard parents shouting and screaming at children but saw no physical evidence would you again leave it on basis of didnt see anything

in loads of cases people will retrospectively report oh heard shouting etc thought nothing of it...
i didnt want to make fuss
couldnt prove anything

shouting in a childcare setting is indicative of poor quality care

SM - No-oe is saying that this persons career takes priority. The fact is the OP didn't see what happened so cannnot be certain. The OP actually admitted she made an assumption, and we all know that to assume makes an ass out of u and me

it would be interesting to see whether the posters who think it shouldn't be reported would slap their own children.

mylifemykids please do report her. no decent cm would do this. it is up to ofsted to determine what happened, not some people on mn.

MLMK,please dont be put off by misguided pleas not to "ruin" CM career

report her today

some of you appall me. a CM career before a child welfare.

get some perspective and prioritise the child

SM - if its recurrent arguments etc then yes I would report a suspected case of domestic violence absolutely. I think anyone would

If I heard parents screaming and shouting at children then I prob. wouldn't do anything if its their kids unless I strongly suspected it wasn't just shouting (also depends on what they are shouting TBH)

As far as the OP has said this is one isolated incident so IMO best to just make sure of what is actually going to be reported before possibly making a pretty serious mistake.

Fishie - the poster has posted this in AIBU which as far as I can see is an area specifically designed to ask peoples opinions. As for slapping my own kids I don't know yet as he is only very small but I might use it as punishment one day yes.

I would never dream of slapping my own child (or anyone else's for that matter).

I wouldn't report a child minder to Ofsted/CPU without being pretty sure of my facts. It wouldn't just be someone's career, it could also be someone's livelihood and reputation I could be damaging or destroying. If a complaint is made agisnst a childcare provider, that complaint will stay on record and be there for people to see whether or not it turned out to be substantiated.

We are talking of a one-off incident here, right? If you've seen or heard other things that have concerned you, that might change things somewhat.

I would be watching the childminder like a hawk.

Shine on 4 dont do it please,"ruin" career comes up 3X

Think long and hard before you report and potentially ruin this womans career.

As Nahui said it is someones career that could be ruined because of a possible wrong assumption

you could ruin her career, even put a question mark over her as a mother. how would you like it if that happened to you over something innocent?

keep an eye/ear out for anything else happening, but think carefully before you report her

Please don't ruin this woman's career for something you didn't see.

SM - FFS No-one is saying the persons career takes priority stop seeing issues where there aren't any.

If anything people are saying get more evidence to hang her with and make sure OFSTED have something to investigate rather than something to dismiss as a busybody thinking she saw somthing (OP not saying you are a busybody there BTW)

The fact that a CM dragged the child indoors by the arm, is enough to say report her.

Whether or not she hit her i'm sure CMs are not supposed to manhandle a child like that nor scream at them.

Reporting someone will only lead to her life being ruined, if she has done something wrong!

I'm with you SouthMum, I would just note the incident down that OP observed and be vigilant for more. But expect us to be in minority. People on MN are always very keen to report somebody for any possible thing; maybe it's a maternal instinct about taking-no-risks that I lack...? .

SM 5 dont do it please,"ruin" career comes up 4X.actually people are sayin it

1Think long and hard before you report and potentially ruin this womans career.

2As Nahui said it is someones career that could be ruined because of a possible wrong assumption

3you could ruin her career, even put a question mark over her as a mother. how would you like it if that happened to you over something innocent?

4keep an eye/ear out for anything else happening, but think carefully before you report her

5Please don't ruin this woman's career for something you didn't see.

SM - nice quotes, but where does it actually say that this persons career takes priority? Oh oh it doesn't.

What people have said is make sure of the facts, watch her like a fucking hawk and phone when you are certain of what you are reporting / seeing, not what you THINK you saw.

posts that advocate valuing CM careerbefore child welfare.unbefuckingleviable

Yes SM - people are simply pointing out that as no crime was actually witnessed, perhaps it might be a good idea for the OP to think about what she thought she heard more carefully.

scottishmummy - Is there two of you on this thread?

I don't get it.

which bit of the 5 quotes dont you get 4 saying no dont ruin a cm career.read them again

they dont say yes report it

what dont you get tomato?

Lljkk - I think it might boil down to the fact that some of us on here accept that we do make mistakes therefore realise it might be possible that the OP has made a wrong assumption.

However if she really did hit the kid then absolutely she needs to be reported immediately, but no-one knows thats what happened.

Tamarto - I agree scottishmummy's posts are confusingly contradictory.