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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Pregnant women smoking quite a lot of weed - just wondered where others stand on this as I judged my arse off but am interested to hear the other side?

98 replies

CurryMaid · 31/05/2009 20:23

That's it really.

A couple of pregnant women I've met lately have been quite heavily into smoking weed throughout.

I have to admit I judged my arse off, although I don't know much about the dangers of doing this in pregnancy so maybe I was making an incorrect judgement?

Just wondered what other's gut reaction to seeing this would be?

OP posts:
Greensleeves · 31/05/2009 20:24

am remaining aloof on this [battle weary]

but top marks for "judged my arse off"

womma · 31/05/2009 20:25

I would have thought it's probably not such a great idea

Weegiemum · 31/05/2009 20:26

have no real input on the weed thing, but must agree - I am going to be using "judged my arse off" on a frequent basis now!

Cos I do

ThePhantomPlopper · 31/05/2009 20:28

My SIL did this when pregnant. I judged too.

Rindercella · 31/05/2009 20:29

Purely anecdotal, but I did know a couple who were real dope heads & both smoked weed throughout the mother's pregnancy. Baby was premature & tiny and had quite severe medical problems. Same was true for the baby of a heavy drinker I knew.

I must judge my arse too, because surely it cannot be a great idea to do either when you're pregnant?

PuzzleRocks · 31/05/2009 20:29

Did you discuss it with them. Did they try to justify their behaviour at all? I would be interested to know why they felt it was ok?

PuzzleRocks · 31/05/2009 20:30

[reminds self to use ? properly]

HumphreyCobbler · 31/05/2009 20:30

well it has to be a bad idea

i would judge too

ThePhantomPlopper · 31/05/2009 20:31

SIL baby was also tiny, not premature but very small. It might have nothing to do with it though.

womma · 31/05/2009 20:32

If you're not supposed to smoke tobacco when preggers, why would it be okay to smoke dope?
I'm off to watch George Gently anyway

Claire2009 · 31/05/2009 20:32

I judged, sister done it when pregnant all the way through 2 pregnancies'

She had small birth weight babies...dunno if the weed was the cause?!

mysistersmokedweed · 31/05/2009 20:33

.

frankbestfriend · 31/05/2009 20:34

I think the risks are the same as those associated with smoking cigarettes, although weed smokers do tend to inhale smoke less frequently than cigarette smokers.

So yes, I would judge, but no more than I would judge a pregnant woman smoking a cigarette.

Ronaldinhio · 31/05/2009 20:38

I'm so fucking bored judging pregnant women that I'd probably have lit and held it for her...

I have no idea of the health risks associated. I imagine they aren't ideal but nothing seems to be now and I can't be arsed anymore.

I just tried my best in my circs and I'm sure they are doing the same

mysistersmokedweed · 31/05/2009 20:44

Just checking...

My sister smoked weed through almost her entire pregnancy. Her partner walked out on her at 30+6 weeks pregnant, and she decided to give up the weed. I went with her to the doctors to ask for help for her.

That night her waters broke . She gave birth at 33+3 weeks. Her little boy was thankfully unscathed, but was small for dates, etc.

Now she is pregnant with his second child, still unsupported, other than CSA. I suspect he feels he can't support her (despite them being 'together' but not living as a family) because he spends about £80 per week on weed! as well as his £20 per week on cigarettes.

She told me last week that she 'occasionally' smokes weed, and that she finds it very hard if a good friend or partner has weed and she doesn't. I take it from that that she is smoking weed while pregnant

I judge, tbh. I can't really cope with the fact that she smokes in pregnancy, let alone weed.

In fact, I find it pretty sad that she is pregnant again when she isn't even getting real support for her first child, although of course the baby is a blessing. She just desperately wants them to be a family

Ronaldinhio · 31/05/2009 20:47

I'm so sorry to hear about your sister and her lo/los, it must be very difficult for her

makipuppy · 31/05/2009 20:48

If I judge my arse off while I'm pregnant will my baby come out all judgy?

MANATEEequineOHARA · 31/05/2009 20:54

I stopped smoking as soon as I found out I was pregnant, and judge my arse off at anyone who doesn't too!
Well, not really, but loving 'judged my arse off' too

I think the worrying part of it would be the social stuff that (not always, but often) goes along with it. Well, health reasons too actually. I am feeling surprisingly not as judgey as usual on this, all my current revision is making me appreciate positionality or such like

ScaredOfEverything · 31/05/2009 20:55

Im pretty sure there is no other side to this one.

If only judging could actually reduce size of arse, Id have the smallest, nicest bum in London..

MANATEEequineOHARA · 31/05/2009 21:00

I would have the smallest bum in the WORLD.

Maybe.

policywonk · 31/05/2009 21:02

When I was first pg (having smoked a lot of dope in the preceding years, including the very early weeks of the NB unplanned pregnancy), I asked my community mw about the dangers of marijuana in pregnancy. She said that she'd rather see a pg woman smoking dope than smoking tobacco (they don't always go together, although of course they often do), and that some midwives are quite relaxed about dope use in small quantities cos it helps to relax the mother.

I was a bit about this - surely psychoactive substances can't be a good thing when the foetus's brain is forming? - but she was distinctly unbothered.

WhatSheSaid · 31/05/2009 21:11

The only person I know who smoked weed v heavily while pregnant also had a premature baby - 26 weeks - and about 450g weight iirc. She would have been smoking it "neat" too - pure grass, no tobacco - as over here (NZ) that's how it's smoked.

I don't know if the baby had any long term health issues but I wonder if there is a link between smoking dope and premature birth - quite a few people on this thread seem to have known this to happen.

NotPlayingAnyMore · 31/05/2009 21:11

I gave up smoking both tobacco and weed as soon as I knew I was pregnant.

So - I'm on the side of the group of the small-arsed mums
(who can be found standing slightly to the side of the pile of their own freshly-fallen arses)

Paolosgirl · 31/05/2009 21:18

I judge anyone who supports the drug trade and all the crime, misery and terrible effects it has on communities that go along with it.

But I would also judge my arse off (love that expression!) if I saw a pregnant woman doing that to her baby.

mysistersmokedweed · 31/05/2009 21:18

Thanks Ronaldinhio. We don't have a great relationship, tbh. I grew up, joined a church, went to college/uni, got married, now have 3 DC.

She grew up, jacked school, moved in with an abusive partner at 16/17, had a miscarriage at 17, then lived with another guy who didn't want to marry her, knows all the 'bad boys' in the village, knows all the drug dealers, although not involved with them directly. Her last 'partner' lived with her until she said she wanted to declare their status to housing benefit/income support. Now he lives in a static caravan, & she goes to see him several times per week.

She resents me, and my life is rubbing her nose in it. She wants what I have - stability, a man who loves me, is a committed father, not much money but work as a team.

She claims to hate me regularly, but I am the one she comes to in crisis. My parents both have depression, and rely on me a lot for support, but they can't cope with her visits because she is always ranting about income support/CSA or her situation, or telling them about the latest fight/drug bust/crime in the village. They can't cope with their own situation, let alone other people's .

She is desperately unhappy, but can't see that her behaviour is pushing people away, and blames me. I hope she gets her heart's desire, but I can't see how a man that won't support her with one child will support her with two.

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