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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be miffed that my 9mo has not been invited to her 4yr old cousin's birthday party?

56 replies

JessJess3908 · 27/05/2009 19:40

We live over an hour away on the train. We have been down there for the day and they sometimes come up to us. The party is in a leisure centre. AIBU to feel a bit hurt that we've not been invited?

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 27/05/2009 19:41

Would a 9mo really enjoy a 4yo birthday party?

YAB a teeny weeny bit U.

Thunderduck · 27/05/2009 19:42

YABU. It's a party for 4 year olds. What would a 9 month old get out of it?

nickytwotimes · 27/05/2009 19:42

Well, she is only a baby really, so going to a party is a bit pointless tbh.
However, I can imagine why you would want to be there, so in that way yanbu.

FiveGoMadInDorset · 27/05/2009 19:43

Yes

McDreamy · 27/05/2009 19:44

yes yabu she's just a baby.

rubyslippers · 27/05/2009 19:44

YABU

If you DON'T have to spend time at a toddler birthday party then it is a blessing

over sugared and over excitable 4 year olds won't mix well with a 9 month old baby

HaventSleptForAYear · 27/05/2009 19:45

YABU. 4 year-olds have their own list of who they want to invite, and a boring 9-mth old baby will not be on it.

It's not like it's a family meal in a restaurant.

Think this is the first time I've said this, (but maybe not )

SOOOO pfb

StewieGriffinsMom · 27/05/2009 19:46

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Boys2mam · 27/05/2009 19:47

I can understand your being upset at not having been asked at least, so on that note YANBU

But its a long trip for your baby just to sit and watch, and possibly get barged about by the older toddlers.

ThingOne · 27/05/2009 19:47

YABU. I would invite a four year old cousin to a first birthday party but not expect the other way around.

wonderingwondering · 27/05/2009 19:47

They may be tight on numbers, as with all the 4 yr old's friends, and their parents, they are probably a bit pushed for space. Why don't you call and ask when you can pop over to celebrate her birthday/give her a card?

We've got a large extended family and now our children have their own friends, birthdays are hard - do we have lots of different parties or one massive one, or just have a friends' party and let the family pop round individually? It is difficult as the children get older.

Original poster
JessJess3908 · 27/05/2009 19:48

She's not boring! but ta for the perspective ;-)

OP posts:
HaventSleptForAYear · 27/05/2009 19:59

Sorry but she might not be to you but she is to anyone else!

HecatesTwopenceworth · 27/05/2009 20:01

If it's a family party then yanbu, if it's a class party (her friends from nursery) then yes, you are being a little unreasonable.

OrmIrian · 27/05/2009 20:01

Why would a 9m old want to go to a leisure centre? I expect that there is a limit and the 4yr old wants to invite school/nursery friends.

Spaceman · 27/05/2009 20:03

YABU; a four year old girl has her own social group and probably doesn't consider a 9 m.o. part of her gang. I wouldn't dream of making my DD invite children out of her own age group to her party on political grounds.

YouLukaAmazing · 27/05/2009 20:04

Message withdrawn

hercules1 · 27/05/2009 20:05

I expect it was difficult to choose which 4 year olds to invite already with limits on numbers and the cost per child. Yabu.

mrsmaidamess · 27/05/2009 20:05

YAB TOTALLY Unreasonable and a bit precious.

lockets · 27/05/2009 20:05

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ReallyReally · 27/05/2009 20:05

'she's not boring'

arf

she is a baby. Four year olds can run about and talk and sing and everything.

SoupDragon · 27/05/2009 20:07

Oh FGS... WTF do you think your9 month old is going to do?

And yes, your 9 month old is boring to a bunch of 4 year olds.

RumourOfAHurricane · 27/05/2009 20:07

This reply has been deleted

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ReallyReally · 27/05/2009 20:08

I guess if you have a 9 mo old you don't have experience of older children?

they invite their friends after 1-2 years old

not their parents' friends or their relatives

it's not a wedding

hatwoman · 27/05/2009 20:08

her parents may also be thinking that it would be unfair of them to make you feel you ought to come, by inviting you - it would be quite a lot of effort for you to go and they wouldn't be able to be hospitable, like normal.