to spy on my dh?

[mrsnosy]

I have namechanged because I'm a little bit embarresed about this.

I received a letter from my kids secondary school telling us we were entitled to a free trial of "cybersentinel" to protect and monitor our dcs computer usage.

It occured to me, could I instead use it to monitor my hubbys usage?

Or what that be a horrible invasion of privacy.

Anyone got any experience of "cybersentinel"? anyway.

If I hadn't been almost 100% sure H was up to what he was.. and had the barefaceness to lie to my face.. I would not have snooped.
I did because I was pretty sure and it didn't take long to find exactly what I was looking for either.. so when he lied.. I gave him the print off.. it was my justice on it to see his face!

but.. it has very serious consiquences!

Would anyone here think it strange if their dh got a xmas card from a work colleague that said

"to richard and amber, merry xmas"

and my name is not Amber, obviously.

Hmmmm, don't think I'd find that particularly strange; would assume they just didn't know my name.

Anything else a bit odd?

works away from Monday to Friday and has done for 8 years.

I thought it quite possible that his colleague did get my name wrong in all innosence because she hasn't even met me, she just wrote the card to include me to be polite if you know what I mean.

Thing is, this "Amber" that she wrote on the card is someone I know of and I am wondering if dh is going on and on about her all the time, and she has assumed it's his wife.

id assume they are bit dim and couldnt be arsed to check colleges wifes name before writting a card.

I'm depressed

Oooh, well that is a bit weird mrsnosy. Have you asked him for reassurance at all?

hmm well before I snooped.. OW had already called my house phone ... and left a message ( quite detailed) for him. but still he denied it.. so I handed him the evidence

Sorry to hear you're depressed. You do sound a bit down and confused

Oh God I just can't explain it. There's no real tangible evidence but I just have a horrible gut feeling. Instinct.

You shouldn't ignore your instincts should you? that's why we have them surely, as an in-built warning system.

Well, I don't think instincts are foolproof by any means. But if you're feeling uneasy then I think you need to tell him so. Maybe no need to tell him you suspect an affair but just say you're feeling inescure and that something's not right between you. Possibly his response might help you work out where to go next.

I've got to go to bed but I wish you well mrsnosy. Will check this thread tomorrow to see how you are.

you are very kind shineon, I've noticed before. I'm too tired to do anything now though, in a few days time I'll probably feel up to it.

Thing is, I thought it was all the rage for philanderers to have 2 mobile phones anyway. One for normal, one secret one to carry out affair with.

Or am I really being silly now?

Hope you're ok today mrsn.

Thank you both very much. I have slept on my dilemma. I'm not gonna use the "cybersentinel", mainly because I think it just stops people accessing certain sites and that isn't something I want to do to my hubby, he's an adult after all.

Re: the mobile phone, I'm gonna do what shineon suggested. I'm sure it will put my mind at rest.

I feel much better today and was probably over-reacting and tired and emotional last night.