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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WWY think?

62 replies

Claire2009 · 21/05/2009 19:13

3yo & 6yo out from 4pm - still out now bouncing on trampoline, playing in their front garden. Their Dad is occassionally popping out to shout that they get away from the shed

OP posts:
Tortington · 21/05/2009 19:46

i don't understand the question katiestar. its my opinion, if you have a different opinion...state it like all the rest and let the op come to a decision on whether she is being unreasonalbe or not

Tortington · 21/05/2009 19:46

but i think a 3 year old and a 6 year old should be nearing bedtime at 7.15 on a school night.

MaDuggar · 21/05/2009 19:49

8pm is a perfectly fine bedtime at that age, and our routine definitely doesnt take an hour!

cory · 21/05/2009 19:49

3yo won't be at school, maybe they do baths in the morning, fresh air is healthy

Original poster
Claire2009 · 21/05/2009 19:51

The 3yo goes to the same Playschool as my 3yo and has been there 9-3pm then home and stuck in the garden since.

My 3yo & 2yo have been in the garden all afternoon, dinner at 5pm, back out, then in bath, book & bed for 7pm.

I (imo) thought it was a little wrong to leave a 3yo & 6yo (who I think has sn) out all afternoon/early evening with their front door shut/stair gate in front of front door shut also and left to their own devices.

OP posts:
Ripeberry · 21/05/2009 19:52

Grief! My girls are 4 and 6yrs old and they can be outside on the trampoline until 8.30pm sometimes and even when they go to bed they don't sleep until 10pm!
I'm the one who needs an early night

Tortington · 21/05/2009 19:53

yes maybe they do, quite right.

however i wouldn't have sent my 6 year old to bed as he had school, and not my twins as they didn't have school( same age difference as kids in op).

cory · 21/05/2009 19:54

Whatever you do, Claire- don't ever visit Scandinavia. This is how Scandinavian children live. When my dcs visit their cousins in the summer holidays, they are often roaming the neighbourhood until 10at night or later. Keeping a child indoors or not allowing them to be out unsupervised is considered cruel.

Now these parents are presumably British, so it may well be that their attitude is a sign that something is wrong.

bronze · 21/05/2009 19:54

glad my neighbours arent judgy types

mayorquimby · 22/05/2009 11:19

brilliant drip feeding.
first post : aibu about my neighbours kids on a trampoline

reply form everyon: wtf are you on about.of course yabu

second post when things aren't going your way: but the parents are smackheads

reply from one and all: WTF

tattifer · 22/05/2009 11:43

Maybe they have concerns about how you bring up your children? You are bringing them up next door to "smack heads" after all.

How do you know they're on smack?

debs05 · 22/05/2009 11:53

I like the fact they are "stuck" outside!

GypsyMoth · 22/05/2009 11:55

mayor quimby....i kinda thought that too

claire...what time did they go indoors last night?

Original poster
Claire2009 · 22/05/2009 11:58

So you chose your neighbours do you tattifer? I didn't chose to live next to smackheads, if I could pick/chose my neighbours I'd be miles away from this shit.

The Police have raided their flat 4-5 times in the last 5-6 months. They have young lads knocking on their door all the time wrecked out of their head, the parents' look wrecked themselves everytime I see them.

Neither work, yet have a '08 car & lots of expensive things.

No I'm not jealous, I wish I could pick my neighbours. And tbh I see this parenting as wrong, but that is just my opinion.

OP posts:
Stayingsunnygirl · 22/05/2009 12:09

In fairness, if the dad was calling to the children to stay away from the shed, it is reasonable to assume that he could see that they were going near the shed - so he was supervising them from the house.

Claire - some children do go to bed later than others - if you see the children during the day, do they look or act tired (whingy, cross etc) or do they seem to have plenty of energy, which would suggest that they are getting enough sleep, even if they aren't going to bed as early as your childre do?

tattifer · 22/05/2009 12:10

Claire2009 Could be skunk not smack

I chose not to have neighbours a few years ago cos the local pub turned into a homeless shelter specialising in smackheads.

OrmIrian · 22/05/2009 12:11

You mean they are out having fun after you think they should be in bed? Outrageous.

Original poster
Claire2009 · 22/05/2009 12:14

He could see them going to the shed area because they had to walk past the lounge window and the 6yo is big enough to be seen walking by.

I only see the 3yo during the day, the 6yo goes to a special school and is collected at 9am & dropped off around 2.30pm. The 3yo is grumpy/whingy and fights a lot at Playschool but that could just be her age.

And yes, could be skunk, I don't know the difference but am assuming smack. Neighbour had an empty methadone bottle in her bin 3-4 days ago with this neighbour in questions name on, she took it to him & told him to put it in his own f*&king bin.

OP posts:
Jux · 22/05/2009 12:14

If we had had a garden when dd was 3, I'd have been happy to let her out there as much as she wanted. I might have brought the odd snack out and a drink of water. Generally, I think it's great that kids play outside and in the lighter evenings the longer they can be out there the better.

I think you are being rather judgey. Have either of hte parents actually been charged, imprisoned? To you they look like smackheads. To someone else, they might be something very different.

GypsyMoth · 22/05/2009 12:18

they are on a methodone programme?

raided but still out and about,not imprisoned. kids still with them not in care....what does it tell you?

Original poster
Claire2009 · 22/05/2009 12:23

that the police haven't looked under the shed and found it!

OP posts:
Original poster
Claire2009 · 22/05/2009 12:24

The Father was imprisoned in Germany not so long ago, only back around 3mths.

OP posts:
tattifer · 22/05/2009 12:25

"empty methadone bottle"

which would indicate that someone in the house might be on script (prescribed methadone)?

I second ILoveTiffany's response I'm afraid.

Rindercella · 22/05/2009 12:25

WWI think? Honestly? That you are one heck of a nosey neighbour. It sounds like those children were having great fun in their garden - getting fresh air & exercise! Drip feeding the bits about smack head parents, older child with SN, 08 plate car when neither parent works , etc., doesn't make me think this any less.

tattifer · 22/05/2009 12:25

Claire, if you know it's under the shed then tyell the police. RIng crimestoppers.