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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be envious of my DH?

62 replies

NoseyHelen · 09/05/2009 23:44

AIBU to be envious of my DH?

We had DD in Sept 06 and DS in Aug 08. I feel my social life has ground to a halt and I'm stuck in our 4 walls whilst DH isn't. DS is still not on a bottle so I can't really leave him and even if I could leave him we don't have babysitter due to no family locally and friends who are not interested in babysitting.

DH has lots of events planned for himself over the summer - lots of cricket, football, even helicopter rides. He asks if I'd like to join him - 'Yes, of course, but I can't leave my breast at home whilst the children look after themselves'. So, he's been kind eneough to give me first refusal on joining him but we both know I'll be at home looking after the children.

We went into town today. I never get to do this on my own, literally not for 3 years, and we ended up looking at watches for him. He already has a £1700 one but 'needs' a £200-300 watch whilst the first one is being fixed. I haven't even got a watch. We took ages over this whilst the children cranked up their crying and I said I had to go to the newsagents for some choocie (seriously, I spend half my time dehydrated and hungry). DH acted like I was being selfish, gave me the house keys and told me to go home!!!

This post isn't specifically about today. AIBU to want more from my humdrum life, to want parenthood to have affected him the same way it's affected me or would I be better off accepting that this is how it is for most women?

OP posts:
HomeintheSun · 10/05/2009 21:47

Is there a home start project in your area, they are very handy not as a childminder but just a second pair of hands while you're out.
I agree with some of the others when they say you need to do something to change this.

Do you go to any toddler groups or anywhere that means getting out the house for a few hours.

angel1976 · 10/05/2009 22:04

NoseyHelen - Everyone has given you very good advice here. You are definitely not alone or a saddo. Sometimes, I think MNetters can be a bit harsh but they mostly speak the truth! I myself am a mummy to a 14.5-month-old son. I am embarrassed to admit that DH has had total responsibility of his son 3x in his life for a decent length of time! And I will admit that I have been precious with my DS and I do wish now that I have not been!

Of course your DS will only want you as you have been the sole care provider in his short life so far! My DS is extremely clingy to me when it's just me and DH BUT if there are other people around, he is happy to ignore me to go to them. But it is extremely important for your DH to build a relationship with him. DH was 'forced' to take care of DS a few months ago for 2 days as I was not able to take any more time off work. Guess what? They both survived and in fact DH enjoyed it a lot more than I thought he would. Ok, I did have to leave instructions on the schedule and make sure all the food is ready to be heated up etc but hey, it's a big step forward!

DS has been ill for quite a few days but I had planned to see a friend today for a girly day out shopping. DS has been to A&E and we know what is wrong with him and he is on medication and getting better. I was tempted to cancel but decided DH needs the bonding time and he needs to know it's not easy to take care of a sick baby! I had such a blast spending money today and I know DS is fine as I called to check (I wasn't far anyway!). I feel so much more human after a few hours out by myself!

Go out to any toddler group in your area. I went to every toddler group there was when I was on maternity leave. When I went back to work, I stuck with the ones I like. I have made some really good friends from the groups and we now take turns to babysit. It will take time. I believed I was depressed when my DS was born. I failed at BF-ing. I had no family in this country. I was so alienated from what my life was before. DH and my relationship was so strained under the pressures of being new parents. The friendships I made at toddler groups saved my life. I am so much happier now. It's not easy but things will get better but you need to go out there and change things. Good luck!

purpleduck · 10/05/2009 22:26

When my ds was about 10 months old, I started an evening job - only a few hours a few times a week, but it was THE best thing, as it meant my ds had to take some milk from a cup, and it increased dh's confidence with looking after him.

Often little guys won'e have anything else if mum is right there beacause, well, because mum is right there.

I would take a course, or sign up to something that gets you out of the house on a regular basis.

Also, if your dh can afford £300 "in the mean time" watches, and helicopter rides, then perhaps you could get an au pair or someone to help out a bit.

You teach people how to treat you ... if you don't say anything, how is he to know?

purpleduck · 10/05/2009 22:29

at the typos

fledtoscotland · 10/05/2009 22:34

noseyhelen - you do sound a bit depressed. cant believe your GP though. cant he make his own decision about your mental state without requiring the opinion of your DH (assuming your DH isnt a psychiatrist)

where abouts do you live? my name sort of suggests where i am. you need to get out and about.

dilemma456 · 10/05/2009 22:59

Message withdrawn

blossomsmine · 10/05/2009 23:18

Yes, i agree with the others, about homestart or something along those lines. That might be a good place to start. You could also contact your HV for advice.

Zenia i am really disappointed with the remarks you made, talk about kicking someone when they are down!!

Hope you have had a better day today.

NoseyHelen · 10/05/2009 23:33

Thanks again everyone. I'm overwhelmed that so many people have bothered to reply and your comments have brought me to tears (in a good way). I have lots of things to think about now. I just need to work out where to start.

Blossomsmine, don't worry about what Xenia said. I expected a certain level of insensitivity; I understand it goes with the territory.

OP posts:
fleetwoodmac · 10/05/2009 23:41

Good luck!

blossomsmine · 11/05/2009 09:34

oh dear just noticed i spelt xenias name wrong, she'll have me for that lol!!

HomeintheSun · 11/05/2009 16:48

NoseyHelen I want to thank you for posting this thread, it has really made me look at my life and I have decided to go out more on my own and not just to babysit other people?s children, I'm out tonight and have told DH that I'm going to go out to the gym for a walk on the treadmill (cause I'm pregnant and have high blood pressure already) I hope you are ok and will take some of the advice on board.

nooka · 11/05/2009 21:52

I think it's something to start in babysteps, get one thing done be pleased with yourself and then try the next.

So if you are feeling run down I would look around for a local evening course in yoga or some other gentle exercise, and then tell your dh that you will be doing that, and he will be on duty at that time (not babysitting, just being the primary carer for that hour or so). Just that small amount of time not being primarily a mum, and spending time with other people who do not see you first and foremost as a mum should really help, and exercise is really good for lifting your mood and helping you feel more together (I find it also helps me sleep, which I expect is still a problem with a 9mth old). Try and time it so it doesn't hit a feed, but at nine months your ds might get angry but he shouldn't suffer if your breast is not immediately available. Your dh will be fine too.

The other thing I would do is look to see if there are any activities for dads and toddlers at the weekend to send your dh off to with his dd. Only having one of them will still be a bit of a break for you and should help your dh to get to know his daughter. Things like tumble tots are a possibility, or perhaps a swimming session or rhythm type session if your dh (and dd) likes music.

Finally I would look to see if you can find a professional nanny or childminder to occasionally have one or both of your children, whether that is just for an hour every now and then, or on a regular basis. That might be in the day for you to generally recover, or in the evening to do things wit your dh, or both. This is not a luxury IMO, if you can afford sporting events, expensive watches etc then you can afford regular childcare and it is a perfectly reasonable thing to do (and not unusual).

Having two children with a small gap is utterly totally exhausting and you should not in any way be beating yourself up if you are feeling very frazzled. The plus side is once you are past the intense baby period it has lots of benefits. I have a 16mth gap between mine, and once the younger was two or so it really became a pleasure and so much less work than friends with bigger gaps because their needs were so similar (great for friendship, holidays etc).

The other thing that I would do right now is to start a food and drink diary, and check to see if you are feeding yourself enough of the right things. Breastfeeding (especially when coupled with looking after a toddler) is very energy intensive. Are you drinking enough on a regular basis? Do you have nice things to eat in the house that make you feel good in yourself? Things like having fresh orange juice, nice fruit and good snacks (nuts, carrots, granola bars) as well as making sure that you are sitting down and eating a good lunch (think plenty of protein) as well as obviously a good breakfast.

One thing I found very valuable when my two were little was having a long bath every night (I also used essential oils - mandarin is a good mood lifter). dh was in total charge at that time, and although it was just 45 mins or so it was important to me.

Personally I do agree with Xenia though. Going back to work restored a lot of balance in my life, and meant that dh and I returned to equal roles (something I really struggled with during maternity leave, being an independent sort of person).

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