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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be dubious about DP getting facebook?

61 replies

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 09/05/2009 19:11

I've had facebook for about 3 years, been with DP just over 2 years. I don't flirt on it, I don't have any ex's on it. I do have blokes on it, but nothing suspicious.

Anyway, DP has always HATED me having facebook but I maintained that as I wans't doing anything inapt, I would keep it.

A few days ago, he got facebook and now there's women on there who I don't like. About my age (23), he's 27. I know that they have reputations etc or some of them I have had beef with in the past before meeting DP. Of course, that's nothing to do with DP and he won't know anyway.

I trust DP 100%, we are in a very loving relationship, that's not an issue at all. But I'm just wondering if this will eventually cause trouble between us? People can be very malicious. I just know how many people have problems with facebook (particularly on MN) and so it's in the back of my mind.

So am I being unreasonable to feel uneasy and perhaps just delete my facebook and not bother with it anymore?

OP posts:
PatTheHammer · 09/05/2009 19:57

Why not just disclose your passwords to each other? That way you bath know the other can check your profile at any time, access messages etc if they felt the need. That's what my sister and her bf do. I don't feel the need but if DH wanted my password I would tell him.

PatTheHammer · 09/05/2009 19:58

Ooops, mean both obviously, not bath!

HellHathNoFury · 09/05/2009 19:58

My DH is innocent until proven guilty - he has never given me any reason to doubt his integrity or faithfulness.

Until he gives me a reason to lay down laws, I won't.

I find this whole 'forbidden' thing very bizarre and a bit unhealthy tbh... but then what works for some people doesn't work for others. Perhaps your DP's don't mind being told what they can and cannot do!

junglist1 · 09/05/2009 19:59

BFF I'm not on it either. I have enough bother getting off here!

daftpunk · 09/05/2009 19:59

dh is interested in me, and only me.

conniedescending · 09/05/2009 20:00

what a ridiculous thread!

people seriously get jealous about photos on FB??? Is everyone on MN suddenly about 13???????

HellHathNoFury · 09/05/2009 20:01

This is a good point - is this thread a joke??
Seriously??

daftpunk · 09/05/2009 20:02

big difference between porn and talking to ex-girlfriends/wifes..imo.

WorzselMummage · 09/05/2009 20:03

Facebook isn't the devil you know..

Df and i are both on facebook, i have loads of men on mine and he has loads of women on his.. it doesn't bother either of us as we trust each other..

junglist1 · 09/05/2009 20:05

I'm not immature I just want a bit of respect. I've had kids with this man and don't expect any contacting of exes it's ridiculous. What if the ex had dodgy intentions? In real life, shit happens, and I'm not leaving myself wide open to it.

SerendipitousHarlot · 09/05/2009 20:05

DP - dh is interested in me, and only me.

Blimey. He must be a godlike creature.

Just cos you're on a diet, doesn't mean that you can't look at the menu

BrokenFlipFlop · 09/05/2009 20:06

junglist1

Apologies, I misread one of your posts and thought you were on it!

HellHathNoFury · 09/05/2009 20:07

junglist, so what if the ex had dodgy intentions? Would you not trust your DP to tell her to shove off if that were the case?

SerendipitousHarlot · 09/05/2009 20:07

Right I'm having real trouble believing this. So to contact an ex that you were once close to is disrespectful because you have children together? Crazy talk.

FairLadyRantALot · 09/05/2009 20:07

lolol....thing is....you can't really ban people....they could just registre under another name, if they would to do whatever weird things on there or anywhere else....it is utterly ridiculous....
some people must be very insecure....

daftpunk · 09/05/2009 20:07

lol...oh he's no saint...but he's not interested in ex-girlfreinds...

WorzselMummage · 09/05/2009 20:10

If a bloke is going to cheat hes going to cheat.. facebook isnt going to make it any easier for him.

If i banned Df from FB i think he's laugh at me .. In a Your Off Your Head type way.

why eould be be with someone you didnt trust ?

junglist1 · 09/05/2009 20:10

I wouldn't trust anyone 100%.Things develop, especially with exes. I'm not crazy either, the amount of threads on here alone about cheating, FB etc is amazing. If my P contacted an ex he'd be out the door with a black eye.

HellHathNoFury · 09/05/2009 20:11

Anyway this is silly now, and maybe a joke.

YABU.
It's only facebook. No worse than MSN/email/or even mobile phones.

SerendipitousHarlot · 09/05/2009 20:12

If my P contacted an ex he'd be out the door with a black eye.

WTF?

junglist1 · 09/05/2009 20:12

Am braced for flaming

WorzselMummage · 09/05/2009 20:12

Seriously ?

WorzselMummage · 09/05/2009 20:12

Seriously ?

junglist1 · 09/05/2009 20:13

OK maybe not a black eye, but def a kick up the jacksie

FairLadyRantALot · 09/05/2009 20:13

I don't think, tbh, that bar this one thread, I have come across a thread about FB and all the cheating that you are talking about, tbh....