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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to SECRETLY want a boy?

59 replies

bratnav · 24/04/2009 10:31

I know I know, not good to have a preference

Our 20 week scan is today and DH and I have decided to find out what flavour we are having.

Is it really wrong of me to want a boy? I have 2 DDs (6 and 5) and DSD (5) and my sister had a boy last year, so it just seems like a boy would be the nicest thing. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I would have problems loving another girl or anything, but I just yearn for a boy

I have told NO-ONE, not even DH about this, I feel really embarassed about it.

OP posts:
Original poster
bratnav · 24/04/2009 13:12

Thanks Chipmonkey

OP posts:
Original poster
bratnav · 24/04/2009 13:12

Scan is at 3.45, will post when I get back

OP posts:
verygreenlawn · 24/04/2009 13:31

Good luck! I must say, each of my boys was longed for, but I'm sure a girl or girls would've been loved just the same. Just remember, they are ALL different personalities - even children of the same sex - my three boys are all quite different from each other!

Also nice in some ways to have a little gang of the same sex, ds3 is a bit young to join in yet but I love the fact the other two often sit there huddled together like a little secret gang, I'm sure your girls are the same. Enjoy your scan.

Original poster
bratnav · 24/04/2009 16:17

Ooooh, it IS a boy

As you were

OP posts:
MrsDanversAteMyIpod · 24/04/2009 16:20

!!!!!!!!!!!!

YIPPEE!

MrsTittleMouse · 24/04/2009 16:20

Glad you have your boy. It would have been OK though, 99.9% of people find out that once they've met their baby, it doesn't matter any more. I think a lot of people when they are pregnant have a picture of their ideal child, and sometimes that involves gender, or a particular talent or interest. You love your child for who they are though.

To answer your previous question, as long as it stays secret, what's the problem?

MrsDanversAteMyIpod · 24/04/2009 16:23

I am getting quite tearful for you bratnav

I got sod all work done today waiting for you to reply.

Blondeshavemorefun · 24/04/2009 16:30

glad you have your boy

now your new dh can have back up in a female only house

Original poster
bratnav · 24/04/2009 16:34

I think DH is really pleased it's a boy, and might have had his own secret leaning IYSWIM. Even our 2 dogs are female so he is seriously outnumbered.

Right, names....

OP posts:
BradfordMum · 24/04/2009 16:37

I had Dd1 and Dd2 and was desperate for a boy 3rd time around.
I still give thanks on a daily basis, and he's 19 yes old now!!
Many congrats to you all.
Sally x x

YanknCock · 24/04/2009 16:42

Yay!!!

lilymolly · 24/04/2009 16:46

I secretly wanted another dd.......and for the first hours after ds was born, I was really upset

3 weeks later I am smitten and glad I have one of each!

Like you bratnav our dogs, horses and cows are all female, so dp was outnumbered

DP is delighted with a ds and so am I

MrsDanversAteMyIpod · 24/04/2009 17:02

We are dead equal in this house

3 females (including one cat)

3 males (including one cat)!

audreyraines · 24/04/2009 17:16

I totally did the same, was SECRETLY desperate for a girl (have one lovely ds), but told everyone before the scan that I thought it was a boy just so I was prepared that way. Of course either would have been fab, but just sooo ecstatically happy that it's a girl!

SarahL2 · 24/04/2009 17:52

We're going to start trying for baby number 2 in the summer and I will be secretly hoping for a little girl.

We already have an adored DS

fingers crossed

SarahL2 · 24/04/2009 17:53

Oh and Congratulations BratNav

Original poster
bratnav · 24/04/2009 18:35

I just can't wait to start having some blue things in the house

OP posts:
nikkid21 · 24/04/2009 19:07

Congrats bratnav

I only ever wanted boys as I thought that girls are much easier to screw up. I had eating probs in my teens and thought that it would be more likely that I could pass this on to a girl.

DS1 came along and then I was expecting no 2 two years later. So convinced that I was having another boy (didn't find out on scans)that we bought a house with a tiny third bedroom on the basis that the boys could share. Of course expected DS2 was a girl.

The first words that the poor thing heard me say were
'It's a girl? Oh shit it's a girl!'

We had to pull out of the house sale and find something else but now I wouldn't be without my very girly girl who DH describes as a pink, glittery terrorist

Disenchanted3 · 24/04/2009 21:13

congrats

Meglet · 24/04/2009 21:17

bratnav I'm so pleased for you!! Bring on the dinosaurs, mega blocks, wriggly worms and cars.

I count myself very lucky as I have a ds and dd.

georgimama · 24/04/2009 21:17

You're not unreasonable. I wanted a boy - in fact I wanted to find out the sex to prepare myself in case baby was a girl.

Congratulations.

nicolamumof3 · 24/04/2009 22:00

this has been a lovely thread to read. i thought possibly now irrationally that a dd was always a preference? now i realise its not the case. i am mum to three ds and adore them all, a 'pink one' would be nice tho for a change...maybe?...but then again i do adore my boys so maybe another boy!!!

sweetkitty · 24/04/2009 22:03

Congrats bratnav

When I was pregnant last time there was part of me that wanted a boy after two girls, DP also wanted a boy.

We found out at the scan and yes for about 10 minutes we were disappointed but then we started thinking about her name.

The minute she was born we fell totally in love with her, she is utterly adored by all of us and theres no way I wish she were a boy now, she has made us both think about a fourth now, of course another DD.

chipmonkey · 24/04/2009 22:06

Oh, Wow, bratnav, I am sooo happy for you!
I have to agree, it is nice for me to know that some people do long for sons as with my 4 ds's I usually get clucks of sympathy!

sweetkitty · 24/04/2009 22:08

What I utterly detest is people keep saying to me "are you going to keep going until you get -your- boy then?" as if I am disappointed with another DD.

Although people with one of each get told "well now you can stop" my friend is pregnant with a third and everyone thinks she is mad as she has one of each but she wanted another baby.