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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not want DD1 to start telling me off thanks to school!

101 replies

JackBauer · 21/04/2009 22:07

walking round shops earlier and a man stepped aside to let us through so I said 'ta'

DD1 snapped at me
'You mustn't say Ta, or See ya, that's very rude, you must say bye-bye, now say it properly!'

After I stopped sniggering I realised she was deadly serious!
She also corrects me when i say 'loo' and says ' no, mummy, it's the toilet say it properly'

Opinions? If someone at school is correcting them like this then that isn't on is it?

OP posts:
Thunderduck · 21/04/2009 22:44

Explanation of calling card rituals here

diedandgonetodevon · 21/04/2009 22:44

I'd be fuming if ds was taught to say toilet. Right up there with lounge, pardon and serviette as unacceptable!

TheFallenMadonna · 21/04/2009 22:45

Seriously? Not really?

MillyR · 21/04/2009 22:46

I don't think there has to be a reason why a lot of people don't say pardon. There is no reason why people don't usually wear green and orange striped jump suits, and I would find it very odd if the head suddenly told my son that he should be wearing one.

Thunderduck · 21/04/2009 22:46

Hope that helps Doodle. Dp's answer of ''how old do you think I am?'' when asked about calling cards,wasn't terribly helpful.

Qetura · 21/04/2009 22:47

Speaking as a proffesional Nanny and Mummy, with over 20 years experience...

I would like to stress that, that does not qualify me to make any judgements on either party but please may I may a make a few general observations.

I imagine you are are a reasonable employer and devoted mummy.

I am guessing, the young lady concerned, decided that registering with a Child Care Agency was not only a legitimate but fairly easy route to access the UK, travel and improve her English.

I am sorry it did not work for you. It CAN work but we have to remind ourselves that although most girls and guys who travel to the UK under this umbrella ARE intelligent individuals with, generally, a fantastic command of the English language. They are not your Vocational Nanny/Mary Poppins (like myself, smile!) Many are tapping into The UK child care market for a brief period in their lives. They are our tomorrows Accountants, Lawyers and Linguists. AND thats OK.

I would like to think the lady you employed from the Ukraine did care but I imagine, from her perspective, she was not only having to adapt to our culture and communicate soley in English but she probably discovered, quite early on, that being soley responsible for a little person for such a long day and every day is a mammoth task, even for a newly qualified Nursery Nurse who has the most beautiful nurturing heart!

We all know that being a parent can be enormously challenging but so incredibly rewarding!

This lady, maybe, would be more suited to an Au Pair position. As a Nanny I have worked alongside the most fabulous au pairs and I have also, sadly, met some High Society Nannies who I would not consider employing in a million years!

You may benefit from discussing and clarifying with your husband whether this is the most favourable child care route or whether you would be more comfortable extending your little ones day at Nursery.
Maybe you might like to consider interviewing a broad spectrum of Nannies, qualified, experienced with or without their own child, live in and out. This will give you an excellent guage of what the market has to offer. I hope you are pleasantly surprised!The girl/guy for you may appear in any of these guises!

There is no right or wrong. You just need to feel comfortable with your decision.

I DO hope this helps!

PS I have oodles of experience and I am passionate about what I do but because I have always struggled with dyslexia I have had great difficulty gaining paper qualifications. I am presently wading through a Pre School Diploma as I find it very tedious transferring the knowledge and experience I do have, to paper. You may find that telephone references and a sample day where you are working alongside a potential candidate give you a truer picture of what that person is all about, rather than making your decision on qualifications alone.

Wishing you the every best in your search!

.

Thunderduck · 21/04/2009 22:48

Wrong thread I think.

TheFallenMadonna · 21/04/2009 22:49

Huge numbers of people do say pardon. Without a reason, it seems odd to object to it. Seriously, is this a snob thing? I keep expecting to see s on the end of posts, but they're not there

theDreadPirateRoberts · 21/04/2009 22:50

That was so very helpful Qetura

hmc · 21/04/2009 22:54

That's incredibly shallow diedandgonetodevon (is there a Butlins there then?)

Doodle2U · 21/04/2009 22:56

A vistor folded down the upper right hand corner if she came in person.
A folded upper left corner indicated she stopped to leave her congratulations.
A folded lower right corner said goodbye.
A folded lower left corner offered condolences.

Bloody 'ell (Prince Philip says that so neeerr) imagine if you were just dropping by to say "Hi" & got your corners mixed up.

Doodle2U · 21/04/2009 22:57

Claps HMC!

Thunderduck · 21/04/2009 22:57

LOL. You could never show your face in polite society again.

Qetura · 21/04/2009 22:58

oops wrong thread!!!sorry folk!! smile!!

Qetura · 21/04/2009 22:58

oops wrong thread!!!sorry folk!! smile!!

diedandgonetodevon · 21/04/2009 22:59

Pardon is just another example of the middle classes trying to ape the uppers and failing miserably.

pointydog · 21/04/2009 23:00

lol @ the morals that school is allegedly foisting on the very young.

You all know little children have a very clear right or wrong attitide on life. They are taught some facts and children apply their own morality. They don;t do shades of grey.

Doodle2U · 21/04/2009 23:00

Right, I'm off to bed. May stop by the bog for a poo-poo or a wee-wee and must remember to shut the lounge door and tidy away the serviettes on the dining table which is situated in the back lounge.

Oh, I just burped. Fuck/pardon/excuse me

pointydog · 21/04/2009 23:02

I think people who say pardon are far more likely to be 'aping' the people around them rather than the upper classes, died

TheFallenMadonna · 21/04/2009 23:02

Please tell me you are posting with your tongue in your cheek diedandgonetodevon.

MollieO · 21/04/2009 23:02

I think you're supposed to say 'I beg your pardon' rather than just 'pardon'. If you say 'pardon' on its own then you should say 'what' instead.

Thunderduck · 21/04/2009 23:03

LOL. Good night Doodle.

MillyR · 21/04/2009 23:04

Fallen Madonna, yes I think it is a snob thing, on the part of the head. He is trying to teach my DS to use words that he (the head) uses, because he presumably thinks the way that I have taught my children to speak isn't good enough!

diedandgonetodevon · 21/04/2009 23:04

Certainly not, sorry to disappoint

IneedAbetterNickname · 21/04/2009 23:04

I'm confused, is this about saying 'pardon' as in 'pardon? I didn't hear you' (which is what I originally thought) or 'pardon' as in 'pardon me, I burped/farted'? Either way I don't see the problem?

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