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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed with this friend

55 replies

desperatedan · 15/04/2009 13:19

A friend recently offered to help out with an errand I had to run. I was running late and very happy to take her offer up.

So, I left a reasonably expensive item with her, which needed to be repaired.

Since then, I've tried to collect it on at least 4 occasions and there is always some excuse why it's not available... I'm at my wits end, as it's not actually mine, and I haven't admitted that I left it with the friend (I said I'd dropped it in personally for the repair). my friend knows how important this is to me - and she knows I'm desperate to get it back.

Now, my friend isn't answering calls, texts or e-mails. It's been about 8 weeks, when the repair should have taken 2 max.

AIBU to be annoyed? and, whether I am or not, what do I do now?

OP posts:
valleysprincess · 15/04/2009 13:20

what was the item?

traceybath · 15/04/2009 13:20

Sounds rather suspicious - she hasn't sold it has she?

rubyslippers · 15/04/2009 13:20

weird

Camp on her doorstep?

do you think she has lost it/sold it/broken it?

fuzzywuzzy · 15/04/2009 13:20

Go round to her house tell her you're fine with it and you'll get it fixed. Once you've got the item off her make sure you never leave an expensive item with her again.

HerBeatitudeLittleBella · 15/04/2009 13:24

go round

Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 13:26

I've already offered to pick it up in whatever condition it's in, I just keep getting fobbed off.

I just don't know if I'm overreacting a bit?

Trouble is, now I can't seem to contact her at all.

We don't live that close together, but I'm guessing going round is the only thing I can do now... Sadly, we're not really 'close' friends, and I think this will signify the end of the relationship...

OP posts:
Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 13:28

Sorry, I should say: I haven't gone round so far, because she says she doesn't have the item anymore - she says it's the repair shop which is taking the time, but she won't tell me EXACTLY which repair shop it's all, so I can't go there directly.

I really REALLY need it back for this weekend, and have no clue what to do about it.

OP posts:
BunnyLebowski · 15/04/2009 13:38

You're not overreacting. At best she's just being slack but at worst she's up to something dubious.

Get your arse round there and confront her.

nametaken · 15/04/2009 13:39

oh just go and camp out and refuse to leave until she accompanys you to the shop.

Is it an expensive watch? Sometimes they do take a long time to repair but I don't understand why she wont tell you which shop it's in.

I hope she hasn't pawned it.

Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 13:46

Thanks, Bunny.

I did think maybe she'd just forgotten about it and I've asked straight out if that's the case. I've made it perfectly clear, I really don't CARE at this point, I just need it back.

I don't think it's pawnable - it's worth a couple of hundred quid, max. but if it's not back this weekend, I'm going to have some real explaining to do and, most probably, have to pay for a replacement which I simply can't afford.

So, I'll have to come clean that I left it with a friend, rather than do it myself, which is going to cause major problems, as I've said I'd done it myself....

OP posts:
Notalone · 15/04/2009 14:15

I'm sorry desperate but this smacks of dishonesty on your "friends" part. Have you made it clear to her how much trouble you are going to be in if you don't get it back? You do need to go round to her (unannounced so she can't fob you off) and demand either the item back or the name of the repair shop that she gave it to.

This happenned to me when I had an expensive Denon stereo that had also been a 21st birthday present. It broke and a "friend" offered to repair it for me as this is what he did for a living. I never saw it again as he sold it. Turns out I wasn't the only person he had done this to. How well do you know this friend?

blossomsmine · 15/04/2009 15:50

Just noticed this thread

Any news on the item yet??

SerendipitousHarlot · 15/04/2009 16:17

What is the 'item'?

Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 16:34

It's just a personal item - something you would wear.

I really can't see my friend having sold it or anything, it's not some sort of vintage watch!!!

Anyway, still nothing, so I suppose I'm going to have to face facts that it won't be back this weekend.

I know that I have to take atleast some of the blame, as I never told anyone that I hadn't dropped this off personally, like I said I would, I just never thought there'd be a problem and it wouldn't come back.

It's just such a pain. I've been promising for weeks now that it'll be back any day, and now I can't get any reply at all.

OP posts:
RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion · 15/04/2009 16:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

MadamDeathstare · 15/04/2009 16:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SerendipitousHarlot · 15/04/2009 16:42

So do I Reality. It's all a bit cagey, imo. I think she's lent her rabbit

Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 16:47

It's nothing untoward - it's just a jacket.

OP posts:
SerendipitousHarlot · 15/04/2009 16:59

Sorry, desperate, I was just messing.

Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 17:08

I'm just really pissed off about it now.

ironically, I was only having it repaired as a favour for someone else... Now, I'm going to have to stump up the cost of the jacket AND have taken it on the chin for the last few weeks for having messed about, faffing on about whether it would be back or not.

I've asked directly if it's been lost or broken or something, and I've been assured that it's not, that it's only a matter of days before it'll be back, so I'm feeling very ticked off about it.

On the other hand, I'm still unsure whether I'm being unreasonable, as I don't think my friend would do anything like that and she has assured me that she was picking it up last week - I just haven't heard a thing since and I've tried leaving countless texts / messages / e-mails to no avail

I think I'm being a bit paranoid, as it's not actually mine and I could really do without having to fork out £300+ to replace it (esp. as DH will expect me to pay, rather than him, as he's offered to sort if previously and I'd assured him everything was fine, so he's angry anyway...)

OP posts:
Katisha · 15/04/2009 17:11

You need to ask outright WHERE it is exactly I think.

SerendipitousHarlot · 15/04/2009 17:13

I agree with Katisha. What's your friend being so dodgy about? And why has she stopped answering your calls?

I would go round and confront her - would you be able to tell if she was lying?

Gorionine · 15/04/2009 17:17

Were are you trying to collect the item from? your friend od the place she is supposed to have brought it in to be repared (sorry, I am a bit thick today)?

Gorionine · 15/04/2009 17:17

Where not were!

Original poster
desperatedan · 15/04/2009 17:21

From her.

She hasn't (and doesn't seem to want to tell me) told me where she's sent it to be mended.

I have asked.

She said she was picking it up at the end of last week, but I haven't heard anything since.

I suppose I'll just have to lie to the loss of it unless she contacts me

OP posts: