to think a DNA test would be a waste of money..

[skiddedinchickenpoo]

Brief history..used best friends sperm and syringe..did positive pregnancy test.Then had huge bleed,cramps etc..presumed mc.Following month slept with ex partner..got pregnant.Everyone says my ds looks like best friend.Ex says ds doesnt resemble himself.Mum keeps telling me to have a dna test as ds is the spit of bfSurely he couldnt possibly be best friends.Had early scan which almost certainly matches with ex.Help.

TBH i would do the test to be sure,you dont want to be wondering forever esp when dc gets old enough to ask,
you must have some doubt or you wouldnt be posting?

Yup, I'd do the test in your circumstances too, if only so you can be sure for your DS.

i agree-if asking you must have some doubt.if i was in situation id want to know.what does your best friend say?

Yes you should have it done. Both your ds and your ex have a right to know.

DO it and be sure, and let the relevant men know as well. Once you have proof then neither man can be arsy about it in the future.

Havent mentioned it to bf.Think hed be cross.Trying to work out how to get his dna without him knowing.

If you can get your ex's co-operation, you don't need your bf's DNA.

why would he be cross.surely he realises after donating sperm that theres a chance the child may be his?and you dont get it without him knowing.

unless of course you are a troll?

NO! I`m not a troll!

apologies

Accepted..thanks

you don't need anyone's permission to get the DNA test. You can get their DNA from their toothbrush, dental floss or hairbrush(or hair, even, but obviously they'd have to be asleep for you to sneak some of that)

If you know your blood type you can sometimes work out the parentage without having a DNA test, because some combinations are impossible.

So, for example, a man with group AB blood could not be the father of a child with group O blood.

So if you happen to have one of the impossible combinations you'll know it's the other father*. If not, you'll be none the wiser, but it's worth a shot as it's free. You should be able to get your LOs blood type by asking the hospital to look ar your notes, I think they take blood type at birth?

For info see this page.

*(unless a mutation has occurred, think this is 1 in a million type thing though)

Actually - I think you do need their consent to obtain a DNA sample (irrespective of whether you can get hold of a hair etc.).

Also - in order to be able to do a reliable test the sample needs to be uncontaminated which is why sterile buccal swabs are taken as reference samples in forensics. If your toothbrush sits in a pot with your DPs it will be contaminated with your DNA even if you won't use it which is likely to produce inconclusive results.

Sorry - but taking a hair of a hairbrush or stealing a toothbrush like they do on telly doesn't actually work in practice.

Unless the DNA test is done with all parties consent they aren't legally binding. I think a DNA test would be a very good idea in this case.

How old is your son? Who do YOU think he looks like?

YOu do it with large cotton buds swabbing the cheek I think? Anyway, you need only do DS & your ex.

Yup LoW.

You would need to do yourself as well - and there would be more certainty in the results if you did both possible fathers but not essential.

If you do decide to do it you really have to be careful who you chose. If you google you will find lots of organisations that will apparently do it for you...some are highly dubious.

I would recommend these guys. They serve the police but it looks as though they also support private individuals - I suspect they will be quite expensive though.

Surely you had an EDD and the hospital knew whether or not your son was premature? A cycle is a big difference between babies, if the hospital think his EDD made him your ex's and they didn't think he was prem, he is your ex's.

I wouldn't place too much reliability on EDDs, especially in these circumstances. I know things have improved over the years, but after my (only) scan I was given an EDD which meant I wasn't pregnant when the GP did the test that said I was...

Four weeks out is a big difference and in a whole pregnancy you would find out if you were out that much. If the baby was 4 weeks early they would know about it, that's assuming the baby was born at 40 weeks.

I'm honestly not so sure you would, but I had two very late babies (both induced). There was some uncertainty around DS1's dates, as I said, but I had been keeping note of LMP with DS2 and he was nearly three weeks late when induced. Four weeks really isn't enough to give certainty imvho, especially as she "presumed" mc - there's no mention that mc was confirmed?

Thanks..think Ill do one.Seen them for sale on eBay,do you think theyre reliable..cost about £100.