For feeling guilty for using a disabled loo

[Reallytired]

I am 38 weeks pregnant and I have SPD. I can walk about 20 metres, but its agony. This is a temporary condition that will hopefully disappear in two weeks time. I am not registered disabled or consider myself to be disabled. At worst I am in a similar position to someone with a broken leg.

I went to a cafe today and I used the disabled toilet because I could not face the pain of climbing up the stairs. There was a disabled person waiting to use the loo when I came out and I hope they didn't mind too much.

I would not take the piss use a disabled loo under normal circumstances.

TinkerBellesMumandFiFi2 THANKS OMG THAT SOUNDS painfull(sorry for shouting)

Realytired - you are in agonising pain, you cannot climb stars. You should in all probability be in a wheel chair or at the very least on crutches. My wife still suffers some 7 years after giving birth because she struggled on walking without crutches for too long.

You are disabled. Use the disabled toilet.

I use the disabled toilet when I have children with me. I would not push in front of a disabled person but frankly I have almost never seen a disabled person using a disabled loo. They are almost never occupied either.

abetadad, don't push it I will run you over with dd's wheelchair (joke)
thanks for explaining , i never knew about this untill mn

disable toilets aren't just for disabled people. they are just the ones disabled people can use. all the disabled toilets around here have the baby change tables in them too because they are the only ones where a stroller can fit in them. and besides, you were in the right for using it anyhow by the sounds of things.

(and the construction worker using the disabled toilet; maybe he had the runs and there was no way he would have made it. the other toilet may have been occupied and he couldn't wait.)

there is no law or stipulation that dictates that a disable toilet is for only disabled people. people have imagined it, probably because it is illegal to park in disable parking.

I have used a disabled loo if its closer to me if either of my children are really needing the toilet. WOuld rather that than have an accident. Also used the disabled loo when i had the children in buggies as couldnt fit into the normal toilet with a pram.

Yes, it is very painful. THW has explained it well.

One day, about 18 weeks pregnant, I was sat at the PC with Tink on my lap. She had fallen asleep so I asked her if she wanted to lie on the sofa (it also means I can't pick her up, although I do whenever I can as I don't want her to feel rejected; and she panics if things are different when she wakes up to when she went down) she got up and I tried to get myself up to tuck her up on the sofa and found I couldn't move. I had to call my dad to come over, I obviously couldn't get to the door so he had to break in.

In hospital I couldn't pick up Fifi when she cried so I had to press the buzzer when she needed feeding and when she had finished. The staff took her to the nursery in the end because they could just respond to her as soon as she cried so she got to me quicker. One night I forgot myself as I fell asleep and tried to roll over, I managed to end up half way down the bed flat on my back and had to call someone to sit me up and put me back up the bed. The first time I got out of bed they told me to stand up straight I said "I am! Without my crutches this is as good as it gets".

The only way I can lie comfortable is on my front but that's not really possible because a. I can't roll over and I'm breastfeeding so b. it hurts my breasts and c. I can't respond to my baby very quickly.

Not a fishing trip, just trying to explain how bad it can be. I'm quite sure I'm not as bad as it gets either.

And baby change labelled toilets arent disabled toilets, they are baby and disabled toilets. just to nip that one before it satrts. No debates to be 'ad there thank you marm.

I don't have crutches yet. I saw a physio at 34 weeks when it wasn't so bad and I was given a support belt. After the bank holidays I am planning to phone the physio to get some crutches. I am hoping that the act of phoning the physio will induce labour.

Thank you for your kind comments.

TheHedgeWitch - wow that is a MN top tip for all SPD sufferers! Never would have guessed Argos sold them.

SPD is the worst pain I have ever suffered. I have been breastfeeding ds4 for 2 years 5 months now, and I began to get better when he was around 2, but then he only feeds once a day now. I am now 4 months pregnant and it has started again, but thankfully is only mild at the moment, so only for the first 15 - 20 minutes after resting, and when I climb the stairs. With ds3 it was so bad that I couldn't take a step, however i recieved no help or understanding. My gp said it was because I had put on weight [hmmm]. With ds4, I used crutches.
You are definately not BU.
You are disabled, in alot of pain, and entitled to use disabled loos.
Will definately consider Argos for them crutches this time.
Thanks for the tip!

Don't feel guilty OP, I had severe SPD in my both my PGs & if the ladies loo were up stairs & the disabled downstairs I always used the disabled for the same reason you did.

herbietea - better than nothing if you are waiting for proper crutches or really just never at all?

Just thinking back to my wife's last pregnancy and the long and stupid wait she had for crutches. Could it have made her worse if she had had some from Argos?

She does not need them now of course but you are the real expert on this and your advice is always very well taken by me.

If it makes anyone feel better, I was wheelchair / bed-bound by SPD for the last 5 weeks of my pregnancy with DS (I had to be hoisted onto the bed in labour - not my finest hour!). The pains went pretty much as soon as DS was born. I got off the bed myself and got in and out of the bath afterwards, something I hadn't done since the SPD started. Though I still had a bit of pain, I was fully recovered by 6 weeks.

I'm 32 weeks pregnant with DS2 and I felt the SPD pains at about 12 weeks. I was referred to a physio at booking in appointment and saw her at 14 weeks. Because I've modified my movements early in the pregnancy and have avoided everything that aggravates it, it's pretty much stayed at the same level as it was at 12 weeks (I do have 'good days' and 'bad days' and I can still function fairly normally (if a lot slower!). I just have to plan my week so that if I have to do something physical (shopping trip in town or Tesco) I have to plan a 'rest day' afterwards where I sit on my arse as much as possible (with a 2.4 yr old DS, this isn't as relaxing as it sounds)

BTW - The OP isn't being unreasonable to use the disabled toilet....

SPD is a disability when it is bad so no, not u at all.

...and agee with thse who say get it seen to early - makes a world of difference.
It is rotten that many health trusts refuse to treat it until 26 wks. It is often too late by then.

herbietea, thanks for the advice about crutches. I will phone the physio on Tuesday.

Reallytired is trying to persaude her husband that she has a craving for super hot curry and sex....

ABetaDad - did the tumeric have any effect?

People - I had mild spd, so not even close to what you are experiencing, but Tumeric supplements helped me a lot. So they might help you a bit. And every bit helps no?

treedelivery - my wife has located some Tumeric extract but she is taking another herbal medicine (Ginkgo Biloba) at the moment for the extreme dizzyness she has. It is working and she is planning to finish that first. She does not want to mix uit up but is planning to take it as soon as she can.

Good lck with it. poor wife! It sounds pants!