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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

or what is reasonable pay for a nanny doing this potential job?

88 replies

Dillydaydreamer · 04/04/2009 23:36

I am hoping to do my HV training soon and will need a nanny from 7.30-4.30/5ish mon-friday. No weekends/Bank hols or babysitting duties. To live out.
2 dds- 3.5 and 18mths both in good routines and well behaved for other people!
Daily duties would be to get children washed/dressed and breakfasts, take dd1 to pre-school each morning and dd2 to nursery (2 mornings) or an activity. Pick up at 12 then lunch.
Children sleep in the afternoon for 1.5-2.5hrs. In this time I expect dishes from meals washed and evening meal prepped if needed. That would be for all the family as we always eat as a family. Nothing complicated as we aren't fussy
I then expect the nanny to rest for an hour lunch
I expect her to take coffee when possible
Extra jobs only expected when both children are at school (3hrs for 2 mornings)
switch washer on which I load.
ironing (childrens only)
hoover/dust/tidy/sort childrens clothes etc in their rooms.
There could be odd occasions where she/he would be needed until 6pm but plenty of warning.
Do I sound like a good employer?
How much would you expect to be paid?

OP posts:
SuperDuperJezebel · 04/04/2009 23:40

It sounds fairly reasonable to me - i'd love to finish work at 4.30! The only minor issue is preparing food for the entire family - do you mean chopping vegetables in preparation for you to cook later, etc, or cooking the full dinner her/himself? I personally wouldnt be keen on preparing the dinner for my employers, but im sure there are others who would be. Whereabouts are you based, as that can influence salary quite a lot?

Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 04/04/2009 23:49

I'm in Dorset.
By preparing dinner I mean peeling/chopping potatoes/carrots and leave in the pan and wrap chicken breasts in foil and sling in oven. Turn rings on if DH not back so things are cooking in time for dinner at 515/530ish iyswim. Not all dinner iyswim.
Or put casserole in oven already prepped by me night before and turn on in the afternoon.

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Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 04/04/2009 23:51

We only have simple meals
hotpot
chicken dinner
pre bought shephards pie
beef/chicken casserole
could easily be prepared in 15mins on the days dds are both at school/nursery

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SuperDuperJezebel · 04/04/2009 23:55

Oh i think that would be totally fine then! Def mention it at interview in case anyone has a problem with it but i really cant see why they would! I just cant imagine myself cooking my employers delicious dinner every night (esp when i am too tired to cook when i get home and eat toast instead!) but that is a different scenario altogether!

Im based in London where wages vary but i would say £6.50-£8 an hour (net) depending on the level of experience you are looking for - having had a look on nannyjob and gumtree most salaries seem to be around that range or up to £10 an hour which may be a bit excessive?!

skramble · 04/04/2009 23:57

Making family meal sounds a bit more housekeeper roll, especially if live out and she will not be eating with you. Doesn't really come under nursery duties, but the lines defining roles and responsibilities are much more blurred these days. Same with hoover/ dust and tidy again traditionally nannies clear up after children and tidy/ clean childrens rooms. But again its not unusual for nannies to do other duties when children at nursery.

I am sure you will find someone willing to do those duites though, no idea about pay rates.

Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 04/04/2009 23:58

Thats good because 10 per hour before tax was sort of what I though so not far off.
I CM at the moment so wouldn't take the micky and pile more and more on iyswim.
I would only expect a nanny to do as I do which frankly is very little!

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Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 04/04/2009 23:59

She is also welcome to come on here if the dds are asleep

OP posts:
skramble · 05/04/2009 00:00

Oh no derf don't let her do that as you will never get dinner made .

Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:02

skramble I know what you mean but we would need dinner prepped for the dds to go to bed at normal time. We bath them at night etc and I don't think I am expecting too much. I also only expect them to have a light lunch of sandwich, soup, beans on toast, salad etc. So not loads of washing up iyswim

OP posts:
salome64 · 05/04/2009 00:02

Would you like her to turn down your beds too? A nanny is paid to look after your children, not your house. Sort your own meals out, hoover your own home. How much would you pay a cleaner/housekeeper for those tasks? add that on to the nanny's wage and she might just agree. I wouldn't.

SuperDuperJezebel · 05/04/2009 00:02

Sounds perfect then Dilly - im sure you will find a great nanny, esp since you know what its like! Def try advertising on nannyjob.co.uk, and also maybe on the nannies, childminders etc board on here? good luck!

Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:03

LOL I do and still prep dinner! With dds and mindee

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Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:05

Thanks jez, I haven't even got the job yet but at least I have an idea. Its not worth getting a CM because of having to pay retainer and so few here do part time iyswim.

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Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:08

salome I think you are being a bit harsh since nannies duties are all care of the child, their things and living space i.e. bedrooms. I only expect their bedrooms done and their ironing, not the whole house (which is small anyway). Bare in mind that she will have 6hrs per week with no children to care for aswell! Should she get paid 6hrs for nothing?

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skramble · 05/04/2009 00:09

I think nannies in this day and age do all sorts of combinations of duties and aren't quite so precious about it.

Traditionally it wasn't seen as nanny duties but then there probably was a houskeeper too and a cook to make a meal for a huge family. In this day and age when nannies work in three bed semis with everday families I think they can cope with a few light duties when kids are sleeping or at nursery.

As long as you are open and honest about duties right from the start there is no problem.

Preping dinner for you when she won't be eating it is the only point that might put a few off, it may not seem like much work but the thought of preping the employers dinner might be more than they want to do, might have to do the 15 min prep yourself and put meals and bedtime back a little bit, it will give your more time with the LOs before they go to bed to.

skramble · 05/04/2009 00:11

Mind you at £10 net I would happily make your dinner .

maybe I should go back to nannying

Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:16

Trouble is skramble is that if we don't have dinner until 545/6pm both dds are too tired and stroppy to eat anything and are then awake during the night hungry. I don't expect them to cook it and serve it up or anything. i.e. if it was spag bol which takes 20mins they wouldn't need to do anything. Only turn the oven on at say 1430 for a casserole which I pre do iyswim or turn potatoes on to par boil for roasts which take an hour in the oven iyswim.

OP posts:
salome64 · 05/04/2009 00:19

Dilly, sorry to have been vague, I agree with the tidying up after the dcs and herself, preparing and clearing up after their meals. even ironing their stuff IF the schudule goes to plan (and we all know it doesn't always). I would absolutely not do preparation for the family's evening meals. She does a full days work looking after your dcs, you do a full days work at work, the other household chores are for you and your dp/dh. But, if you find someone who is ok with it then fine, just don't have it as an essential part of the job spec. Many lovely nannies may well be crap at cooking, don't like it, aren't good at it, and it forms no part of their professional duties.

salome64 · 05/04/2009 00:21

And to be fair, those six hours is not doing nothing, she or he is still minding your children, keeping them from harm. checking on them. prepping their lunch, ironing their stuff, tidying the bedrooms etc...

skramble · 05/04/2009 00:21

I do see what you mean, tired kids are a pain to feed, as I said a bit of simple prep won't put everyone off.

Maybe a sneaky push back of meal and bed, couple of minutes at a time just to give you and extra bit of time to get in and hand over then sort rest of dinner out, could work if they are up in plenty of time in the morning, just shift them on a bit, must have to do it when the clocks changed.

Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:25

Salome how can she be checking on them and caring for them when they are at pre-school and nursery for those 6hrs, she has another 1.5hrs a day while they are asleep on top and will essentially only have 1 child for 3 mornings and they sleep most of the afternoon! Hardly demanding really.
The evening meal will be for the dds, but we all eat together so there has to be enough for all. I don't believe in feeding children separate from the family if it can be avoided.

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Original poster
Dillydaydreamer · 05/04/2009 00:29

They wouldn't stay in bed longer in the morning so going to bed later every day would just mean tired and grumpy children for all. That would be harder than prepping dinner 2 times per week!

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skramble · 05/04/2009 00:36

They would if I was their nanny [said in the tone of a victorian nanny]

salome64 · 05/04/2009 00:38

Um. Dilly. I do get your point. But you have several jobs that need doing here, not just caring for the dcs. While it would be more convenient for you to employ just one person to do all these jobs ( and I do empathise with that totally) in reality, can you find that ideal combination? Its a dilemma many of us face.

Do we have a cleaner to clean? and a nanny to nanny? and cook to cook? Much easier to pay one person to do all of these tasks on a full week basis. My only point is is that a fully qualified nanny might reasonably object to doing those other tasks, a good cleaner and cook are no use to you apart from that. You want one person to perform on all sorts of levels.

A good nanny will feed your dcs mid afternoon anyway, so they should not get frazzled through lack of grub. And if you are late home and she agrees to those hours, then yes, she should feed them tea at 5/6 as well. Just do not accept she should be catering for you and dh/dp as well.

skramble · 05/04/2009 00:40

Goodness how do SAHM mothers cope

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