about telling someone the sex of a friends babies when she didn't want to know.

[chickers]

I feel dreadful, I know a lady who is having twin girls in about 8 weeks time. She told me that it was not a secret about the twins or the girls.
A random conversation with her childminder resulted in me telling the childminder how chuffed this lady was about having 2 girls (as she has 2 boys already).
The childminder flipped out in front of me telling me how upset she was that I had told her that her employer was having girls, that she hates knowing what people are having and that I had totally ruined everything.
She was so upset she ran off crying, leaving me speechless. The following days have seen me blanked by lots of people at pre-school as she has told all of them what I said.
I feel awful but how was I to know.

She sounds a bit mad - they're not her babies are they?

Wierd reaction. Also didn't think you could employ a CM.

That seems such an over-the-top reaction, by her and any others that have given you looks. The one who is having the babies is happy with everyone knowing so what is it to other people whether they know or not? They can decide that about their own pregnancies, but I fail to see how it would affect them when it is about someone else.

YANBU, it wasn'tr a secret as far as you were concerned. Her reaction seems a little ott to say the least.

How odd!

I do not think you are in the wrong at all so I dont think you should lose sleep over it.

Silly woman.

Oh my god.. she sounds totally nuts.

Especially if you didn't know that she didn't know.

She is clearly a bit unhinged, I shouldn't worry. You've done nothing wrong.

She does sound odd. If the parents aren't keeping it a secret then you weren't to know. Also very odd that people would blank you over it. How old are they for goodness sake? Strange behaviour for grown ups.

you weren't to know. Don't worry. The lady told you the sex but didn't tell you there was anyone to not tell, did she? and if she's telling you then obviously you think it's information that she's happy to share.

childminder sounds a bit unhinged to me, to be blunt. running off crying? getting people to blank you?

In your position, I would go to her at pre-school and say loudly "I am sorry you are upset but I had no idea that you had asked X not to tell you. When she told me the sex she did not tell me not to tell you."

I think she's being very stupid. and I think people blanking you are being stupid too. Tell those who are not, exactly what happened and let the grapevine do the rest.

What a silly woman.. and she looks after other people's children?
Scary!

YANBU. She is totally off her rocker!

Some people are funny about other mothers finding out the sex of their own unborn babies - it's none of their business!

I had a colleague at work berate me for finding out the sex of my first baby while pregnant, I told her I don't criticise other mothers for NOT wanting to find out!

I don't think you can employ a CM- wrong use of words. I think the other mums at pre-school think this CM is amazing. She is quite loud but very friendly you always know she is around in the playground.
I just need to toughen up a bit but its bugging me.

People actually leave their children with this fruit loop?

I think I'd tell this lady to find herself another CM!

My DH just made the point that when you meet someone you can't ask them first if there is anything you can't talk about!!! Thought that was very true.

chickers, she sounds bonkers!

chickers She sounds weird .

Are you absolutely sure other people are blanking you?

I once had an experience at school where I thought people were talking about me, because of something I'd said, and got totally paranoid .. turns out no one was, but I had got myself in a state about it. School playgrounds can feel very exposed places.

Hold your head high. You did nothing wrong.

It a word... NUTCASE!!!!!

Don't worry bout it she's obviously got some issues. Not your fault though.

Thanks for your messages. Feel better already hate stuff like that. She is a nutter and I was considering my kids going with her!!

If people were truly blanking you, perhaps it was because they were afraid the nutjob would attack them next for speaking to you? She sounds scary/crazy enough!

omg - she sounds a right nutter

does it really matter that she now knows the babies are girls?

weird - i would tll the mum to stay well away from her tbh

Maybe she has lost twins or is longing for a girl herself. There has to be more to it than just being a bit OTT.

Agree tehre may be more to her odd reaction, but also think that the friend who's pg could have said, "don't tell the CM" if she knew that she didn't want to know. And agree that you need to make sure that as many people who do still talk to you in playground know that friend made no secret and was v pleased, wish you'd known her CM didn't like to know what people were expecting. (Though is a v odd reaction - surely you can't help but hear what people are having if they know themselves and make no secret of it? I can think of several pg mums who I only slightly know from playground but have heard what they are expecting)

Did you mention it to your pg friend, and what did she say?

i would mention to the other mums in playground that the mum was really happy to find out she was having girls and thats why she told you

Nutcase. Did she tell you as soon as you started chatting that she didn't want to know?

If it were her own child you'd somehow found out about, it would be understandable but YANBU - that childminder and the other parents sound very, very odd