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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is not the behaviour of a responsible mother!

53 replies

LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 09:01

39 year old mother, in the pub guzzled a whole bottle of wine, talked loudly about bumsex whilst with our small group of mums from DDs nursery school. Made one of the women go and ask two guys if they were gay and then when they weren't - got talking to them about tattoos and actually showed them her tattood nipple. This was in a very upmarket pub/resturant. Then, said mother staggered home, alone - along a deserted beach, sending random texts to people. Got home, kept her poor DP awake with her tossing turning and generalised whining. Puked up this morning and woke up too late to take her DD to nursery - outrageous behaviour!!!!!

OP posts:
Jenbot · 27/03/2009 12:48

Having your nipple tattoo-ed (sp?) must bloody hurt. Why on earth did you decide to do that?!

madwomanintheattic · 27/03/2009 12:54

it can't have been that good, lol, your recall is perfect

i do remember once (vaguely) ringing around a few people i knew asking if they had seen me the night before, and if so, what was i doing...?

it beats my evening anyway though

Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 12:54

oh - not actually my nipple, just that the tattoo i have sort of goes around it - but well, i usually just flash the cleavage bit, but not last night oh no no no!

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pamelat · 27/03/2009 13:08

Gosh. An antenatal friend and I were out with a group of my "non mummy" friends a few weeks back and got horribly tipsy (it does not take a lot these days) I think that tolerance levels are the problem!!
Our husbands gave up on us as we made our way around the (nice/upmarket) bar telling people that we didnt get out much

Lulumama · 27/03/2009 13:10

naked karaoke! and i thought karaoke could not be any worse !

have two alka seltzer, a bacon barm and hot sweet tea

nipples, bumsex and puking..my head is spinning on your behalf

mumof2teenboys · 27/03/2009 13:11

sounds like my kind of night, i was at metallica with my 16yo son and his mate on wednesday. i was wearing a fairly low cut vest top (lots of cleavage). 2 blokes were complimenting me on my breasts, my son told them off
Disclaimer : i wasnt that drunk but the 2 blokes were

mrsjammi · 27/03/2009 13:18

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mrsjammi · 27/03/2009 13:18

This reply has been deleted

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Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 13:45

i remember years ago, my friend had her first dinner party - she is a bit of a hyacinth my friend. She was trying to be posh and show off to our other friends new posh boyfriend!! She might of regretted inviting me - the evening ended with me sitting puking on her doorstep which faced directly opposite her neighbours house, which luckily were her cousins else i think she would have had a lot of explaining to do - i just remember her DH trying to make DP drink more brandy as they stood over me and my friend pouring boiling water between my legs as i kept vommiting!!! I think this is the last time i saw my DP paralytic drunk. He was sick in the cab on the way home .

I feel a bit better now i have had sausage and chips a nice healthy lunch.

I haven't done anything like last night for a long long time - i do feel a bit of a plonker, but i actually feel quite good about it too

I even came away with someones number! Although hadn't "scored" it was a work contact for DP - but he was beautiful. Thing is i don't think i can pass the number on to DP because i think i told him over and over how gorgeous i thought he was and you can't be in your 50s. He was mixed race (i hope thats the right thing to say) and i do remember asking him where he was from - London he said!! I thought he was possibly iranian or something, but he said he was mixed race and i think i felt and changed the subject.

I'm going to be tortured with drips of recall all day arent i!

OP posts:
Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 21:06

Well i am sitting here in shock

DP is being really awful with me about last night!! I am literally gobsmacked and like, WTF?? Yes, going out and getting ratarsed on a school night wasn't the most sensible thing in the world because ive had to deal with DD all day with a hangover. He is incensed about her not going to playschool - the only reason i didn't send her is because SHE woke up late - a) it would have been a mad rush to get her there and more importantly b) If she didn't get up until 8.30 that tells me she is really tired. She goes every day for the mornings and sometimes it does get a bit much for her. She doesn't have to go by law although the school is funded for full attendence and you cannot choose to attend part time. Saying that, many of the parents have their children unofficially only there 3-4 days. So, whats his problem with that?? I have done this before when she hasn't woken up and i didn't get a bollocking for it - oh no, he told me that he thought it sensible!!!

Yes,i haven't done much with DD today, but she has seemed happy enough, i have played with her - albeit from a horizontal position with support from sid and andy! She hasn't been miserable, in fact i think she quite liked the lazy day.

I DO feel a bit bad that we didn't go out and i wasn't more with it, but its one day FGS, its not like i do this all the time. In fact, i have been drunk twice since DD born 3.5 years ago, including last night.

I don't know what his problem is - he is grumpy and talking to me like shit, calling me irresponsible and that i "have got a problem". Honestly, i just can't believe he is being like this, he has never ever been caveman like in the past. He deliberately undermined me over giving DD an ice lolly previous to having her dinner - guess what, she didnt eat her meal . He is looking at me like he hates me - do i really deserve this?

Is there anyone out there who actually thinks IABU? Honestly, because im not sure?

OP posts:
AutumnMists · 27/03/2009 21:31

Don't worry, he's probably just

It would be no different if you were looking after your dd with flu or something, and the odd lazy days are really good for everyone!

Ivykaty44 · 27/03/2009 21:35

Tell your dp that you are only an irresponsable mother if you leave your dc with someone totaly unsutable and irrisponsable whilst you go and get totally drunk - is he unsuitable??

Flibbertyjibbet · 27/03/2009 21:35

I reckon he kept her up far too late last night plonked in front of dvds while he was on the internet father/daughter bonding, for her to have been so tired this morning.

I am so of your night out that I am temtped to call social services. That would teach you to go out and get pissed on a school night

pooka · 27/03/2009 21:37

I certainly don't think that missing pre-school once in a blue moon is remotely irresponsible/out of order.

When dd or ds were tired, I'd keep them off. PLenty of time for them to have to be at school - make the most of the flexibility of rpe-school.

PLus having days of little action v. good. It's official. Read it in junior magazine. Nothing wrong with a bit of pottering round the house - apparently our children are massively over-stimulated, leading to them being unable to amuse themselves. So your dd had an important life lesson today.

Hope it all blows over soon.

TheFallenMadonna · 27/03/2009 21:38

Was he worried about you? DH was a bit miffed with me once when I got home at 1.30 instead of the 11ish he'd been expecting.

Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 21:41

No FM, i was massively stupid and walked home along a pitch black beach and through the harbour. I did mention that to him, and he said he couldnt care a shit if i fell in the fucking harbour, its DD he is worried about

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TheFallenMadonna · 27/03/2009 21:45

Well, yes, that's what he said...

Is it not bluster? Displacement?

ingles2 · 27/03/2009 21:48

How much did you tell him about last night? Was he worried? or is he narky because he's tired due to a bad nights sleep?
The only irresponsible thing you did was walk home alone on the beach you daft woman! Please don't do that again.
Hopefully it'll all blow over by tomorrow

Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 21:49

yes, displacement of his own stress because his job is running behind and he has no money NOT MY FAULT BUSTER get your fucking finger out of your arse!

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ingles2 · 27/03/2009 21:49

bloody hell x posts... that teach me to type and eat

TheFallenMadonna · 27/03/2009 21:50
Sad
ingles2 · 27/03/2009 21:52

Ah Lem,.. no....
Course he was worried. He's pissed off because he's not finished his job, he was worried, he's had a bad nights sleep and how very dare you, you've have a good night out.
It'll be fine tomorrow

Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 27/03/2009 21:55

FM - i hope you dont think i was directing that at you. Anyway, im going to go and do some grovelling, see if i can't rescue the weekend. I hate this.

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solidgoldbrass · 27/03/2009 23:05

Let him get over himself. He's probably grumpy because of his own stress (and when you're stressed then anyone else doing the tiniest thing that's a) enjoyable and b) causes you the slightest inconvenience, is a hideous crime). You didn't put your DD at risk in any way, and a quiet day will do her no harm, and even if you put yourself slightly at risk by walking home along an unsafe path, you survived it.

Original poster
LEMAGAIN · 28/03/2009 08:23

HE APOLOGISED Brownie points to MR LEM

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