To actively avoid smokers now I have a baby?

[poshsinglemum]

I used to be a smoker but gave up a year before I became pregnant-I used to quite enjoy it too. Now I have a baby I am horrified when someone lights up near her and I cannot abide smoky places. I have asked some of my friends if they would not smoke around dd and I feel that I don't want to hang out with them. It wouldn't have bothered me so much a few years ago. I just hate it now and i do not understand why i used to smoke. eugh!

YANBU - I hate going near smokers when Im with my dd and actively scowl at them for smoking right outside doors to restaurants etc when there are clearly labelled and empty smoking areas.

Its smelly, disgusting and dangerous so I would steer clear too!

YANBU - atall! Now with the smoking ban I find very few occasions when people smoke near my DC's - if ever.

Is it a reason not to want to befriend someone though if they are otherwise a nice person. i think that would be taking it too far but i don't like it when people smoke around kids.

Surely it is enough not to ask them to smoke around your LO? Unless you have enough friends to discard because you do not like their social habits?

Where are the smoky places you are going? If it's friends' homes yanbu to avoid them, but I don't understand otherwise...tell me so I can hang out there

There are certain things that can put you off a person. I'm always a bit of other mums I see smoking in their car. I just reckon were not going to have a lot in common.

I know. once a mate invited me to hiis bday party with dd but i had to make sure that no - one smoked around her as he and all his mates are smokers. All the smokers were in the garden all afternoon by the bar b q whilst i stsayed indoors with dd who was only 4 months old then. I couldn't ask them not to smoke. ididn't enjoy the party but my friend insisted i brindg dd. he is childless and naive.

i find that friend avoids me now as we are no longer on the same wavelength. i guess this happens when dc's arrive.

I remember parties like that when DS1 was a baby. Gradually all our friends have had babies too (or got together with partners who already have DC's), so now they are all much more reasonable aware of things like smoking around DC's.

I don't know anyone who would smoke around a child

I don't mind being around smokers myself (as long as not in a really enclosed space), but I don't bring my kids around smoke if I can help it. My dad smokes loads and a few of my friends smoke, too, but they are all really respectful and smoke outside if they come round or if I bring kids to them.

I sometimes smoke when I drink but at no ther time (all the time?)
It sounds like it's the people not the smoking that is the issue

I know a mum and she smokes and her house stinks of it. Am I being unreasonable not to want to go round there? She's not a bad person at all - she's quite nice, but I get the feeling that this is a bone of contention- I don't want dd to spend tiome in that smoky environment.

Does she actually smoke in the house whilst dd is there or is she a smoker who smokes outside whilst she is there?

Not sure tbh. Whatever it is the smell is all pervading.

stale smoke will not harm pfb
current will

i've stopped going to friends places who smoke and have openly told them why i wouldn't be going to their houses anymore. however, i may extend it to restrict my heavy smoking friends from holding her too: my friend held her for only a few minutes but DD smelled like an ashtray after. yuck

YANBU. Why why why is smoking still legal?? ALL of DHs family smokes, stinky bunch.

< inhales deeply, blows out stinkiness all over LadyOfWaffle > Ahh, lovely!

Did you know that smoking outside the house and then coming indoors around children is actually more harmful than smoking in the same room.

i better find that statement otherwise ill be in the shit with you all

I think that stale smoke smells disgusting- far worse than er ''fresh'' smoke!

Is it the smell or the harm that is the issue though?

YANBU