when DS19 says he will not put the rubbish out because he doesn't want to

[purepurple]

that I don't have to cook his tea or do his washing because "I don't want"?

Sounds fair enough to me.

to

That's the way it works in our house. The minute a child refuses to do something necessary, I point out that I too can withdraw my cooperation from them, with more far-reaching results...
It always works.

YANBU!
In fact I wouldn't let him in the front door because I felt like it.

I wouldn't be doing a 19 year old's washing anyway tbh.

I wouldn't want to.

I feel like kicking him out the front door!!
Ungrateful bugger
apparently, he's had a hard day at work

I wouldn't be doing his washing in the first place! How did that happen!?

Does he wear shirts to work? Do you wash them?

Hijack! Purepurple did you see your comment was used in 12th March Nursery world?

you could perhaps point out that if lived away from home, he'd have to come in from work, cook his own tea, wash up, AND take the bin out....

no, he is a bricklayer and I wash everyone's clothes
he is a lazy git who has done less and less round the house as he gets older
and has the cheek to say that he doen't have to do anything now because he pays board money

I am running myself ragged, working full time, trying to runa home and studying for a foundation degree

Sounds reasonable to me! Just make sure that you stick to your guns

Fair enough. He sounds as though he's sailing close to the wind anyway, expecting you to do that at his age..

juneybean
I don't actually read nursery world, I just post on the forum
what comment??
do tell!

ya so nbu
tell me how you get on though(from a mum to a 17 yr old)

Aaargh, just read your bit about him not seeing it as his job because he pays board money! am seeing red now. Tell him to either

1. do his own washing and cooking or
2. pay you extra per service or
3. move out and get a flat and see a) how much more it costs and b) how many mugs people will be around to do his washing.

He's being a lazy git, but I suspect you know that already.

Don't children leave home when they are 18? They should, you know.

Just sit down and do a few sums with him. The sums go like this:

Board £x (staggeringly small amount)

versus moving out:

Rent
Bills
Laundry
Food

All totalling a staggeringly large amount

Hopefully he will understand. If not, show him the door

Very inconsiderate behaviour living at home at the age of 19. Does he not have a sex drive?

well, he has now taken the rubbish out and has retreated to his pit room and is jumping up and down to his "music"

How much board does he pay? Bet it isn't anywhere near enough to pay for his room, heating, lighting and share of bills on commercial basis, let alone cooking, cleaning and provision of meals.

Out of interest, how long are you prepared for him to go on living in your house on this basis?

pmsl at the idea that a 19yr old would be able to afford to leave home these days

It was taken off the message boards re: "just out of interest"

You were talking about unions hehe! I forget about the message boards!

x posted with everyone in the world.

This is a useful function of tertiary education - they have to leave at 18. If you're sneeky like my mum you can move house while they are away, and when they get to the train station to return home for Xmas holidays, they phone plantively to ask for your address .

Out of interest, does anybody know how much a service wash costs? I should at least £10 per load. And if he's a bricklayer he probably gets quite dirty.

As for suppers, if he were eating out, he should budget at least £7-10 per meal.

I think he is attempting to turn into an MCP. Squash this attempt, for his sake!

DH has always told him he will have to leave at 21
I have ranted at talked to him about moving out till I am blue in the face
I am thinking of taking all the fuses out of his TV/computer/ps3
that will really confuse him