To think that smashing stuff because you're annoyed is bloody ridiculous behaviour for a grown-up?

[Queenoftheharpies]

I'm not talking big stuff, and it happens maybe once or twice a year. Throwing a cellphone at a wall, for example.

I don't feel in any personal danger, he's never hurt me and never would. As far as he's concerned it's a safe, easy way to "get it out". I find it disturbing and ludicrous in equal measures.

Am I over-reacting? Is the world in fact full of people venting their rage on inanimate things and I'm just an uptight bottler-upper?

therapists get people to punch pillows. Which would be cheaper than replacing a mobile.

My DH has stabbed a radiator with a screwdriver in a fit of rage. I'm with you - it's childish and overly dramatic.

My parents' caravan has a he-uge dent in the side because - as Dad put it - "It was a choice between hitting the caravan or hitting your mother." (Said jokingly, but it does get rather fraught when Mum has to give Dad directions for backing the caravan in somewhere.)

I've kicked and punched walls before. Which hurts.

But then I am deeply childish....

Please don't visit my kitchen any time soon.

yep it is stupid. but everyone does stupid things when they see red. for example swearing at a traffic jam or beeping your horn is for the most part fruitless, but it releases your frustration.
ditto swearing at your car if it won't start in the morning shouting "ffs start you useless lump of metal" is of no practical halp but people still do it.
throwing things and punching walls is just an extension of this, the person doing it knows it is not going to solve anything, in fact it will make things worse, but it makes them feel better and it's a release

i can remember my dad punching holes in doors and staring at my mom and it still sends a shiver down my spine.
its not childish, its fucking scary!

I once scratched the paint on a door when I was really cross, and another time threw a glass on the floor.

I was about 7 though.

I have always reacted with derision to 'plate-smashers' (Comments such as 'Why don;t you go and have a wank instead' tend to spring to mind).
THough whether it's pathetically naff or scary does depend on the individual and one's relationship to them - I did once go out with someone who was great at punching walls with a clear implicatin that sooner or later it would be me that he hit...

yesh its childish and stupid behaviour
but i do it often
im a badtempered idiot

I'm sure it was, ilovetochat - however, it would be physically impossible for me to punch a hole in a door as I'm not strong enough - all I do is bruise my knuckles - so in my case it is childish, but as MQ says, it's a release and it only hurts me.

Sorry you're

" can remember my dad punching holes in doors and staring at my mom and it still sends a shiver down my spine.
its not childish, its fucking scary! "

but that's obviously threatening behaviour and ,correct me if i'm wrong, not really what the op was talking about.
i've smashed things out of anger, but it's never been with the intention of intimidating or frightening someone, it's just been childish,stupid and regretable. although i'll admit sometimes really satisfying.
to me theres a big difference between that and punching holes in a wall while staring at your wife.

** meant to add
which is horrible behaviour which i think would be roundly condemned by all right minded people. it sounds horrifying and i'm not suprised you were scared, as i would have been as a child.

having grown up seeing stuff like that, i would find it scary even if that wasnt your intention and would never let dd see stuff like that.

LOL at the caravan.

He used to punch walls, and to be fair he has got a lot better at managing his emotions. These incidents happen much less often than they used to and are much less damaging. It's been ages since he actually hurt himself for example.

He says that hurting me never even enters his head - it's all about expressing an inward-facing rage.

Once or twice a year I most definately get the urge to smash a plate or chuck something. I don't though. I like my plates. I rip up lots of newspaper instead and scream. Or cry. Or sulk for a bit. Or get myself out for a jog.

Don't think you're uptight at all. Perhaps you just don't get angry so much.

I've smashed a glass (only 1) in the 15 years ive been with dp and damn did i feel good!! Im certainly not condonging viola
ence but once in a while just ones it certainly eases that stress, i had a good chuckle with dp afterwards!

I scream and shout and jump up and down until my feet hurt. Have slammed the phone down repeatedly until it broke when talking to the CSA and tax credits people too in sheer exasperation.

I one got so wound up with the dc at breakfast time, what they wanted and what they did't want, and i threw a box of rice crispies across the room. omg the mess, theyjust crunched across it as if it normal, and got ready for school

I used to be a bit of a thrower when I was in my teens/early twenties (not at anyone).

I have not done anything like this in recent years, and I definitely would not do it in front of the kids as it is a loss of control and therefore scary. The irony is that at times since having them, I have felt the need to do it more. I have replaced it with the odd door slamming, and (as I have mentioned on here before), going into a room on my own and swearing/flicking the Vs

YANBU, but don't you ever feel enraged? (my DH doesn't either)

ROFL at "flicking the v's"!

paws I know, sometimes I even "give them the bird" (as I believe it's called)

Occasionally - but it takes a hell of a lot.

I'm sure the DC will find a way to push my buttons when it arrives though, so we'll see.

Maybe I'll join the club! Rice crispie chucking sounds fun :-).

I'm sorry but inanimate objects are the things that have the capacity to fill me with the most murderous rage. Especially when they WON'T WORK. Deliberately.

I used to have a mutually hate based relationship with our Hoover. I stuffed it in the wheely bin one day.

My other source of grief is my house. Yes the whole house. I haven't wored out how to fit that in the wheely bin yet though.

I have had the urge to throw many a printer out the window