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AIBU?

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Original poster

tad upset with my DD's school tonight.........................

58 replies

psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 22:30

DD1 is doing dance and drama GCSE.

tonight they were taken to see a show as part of their coursework (to the tune of £15 cost to us parents)

anyhoooooooooooooo

she has come home telling me about all the naked people in the show.

I asked her what type of nakedness.

she replied full-on nakedness.

and there was swearing, altho she is 14, so not immune to that.

I have just looked up the show tho, and they should not have even been allowed entry.....

tickets.lighthousepoole.co.uk/public/show.asp here]]
[[

OP posts:
Original poster
psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 22:48

thunderduck, are film guidences really not enforcable??

how can they be enforcable by law then on selling DVD's in shops?? (or are they not...))

OP posts:
Flamesparrow · 17/03/2009 22:48

do you have an alex barclay book, and have you seen my pics?

They should have said it was recommended 16+ to let parents make judgement call.

cornsilk · 17/03/2009 22:49

I think I would have been pretty horrified and embarrassed at 14 to be faced with naked bodies like that - I had a very uptight mum where nudity etc was concerned. If she's not really bothered by it then you know you've done something right anyway psycho!

Thunderduck · 17/03/2009 22:49

I'm trying to Google it. If they are enforceable by law and a cinema is commiting an offence by allowing a 12 year old to see an 18 for example, then that makes the UK pretty unique in the Western world.

It is possible though.

Desiderata · 17/03/2009 22:49

To be fair, it all sounds a bit crap to me.

Fourteen is a difficult age .. God knows, we've all been there.

I think that Shakespeare or Riverdance (shudder) would be more appropriate given the curriculum.

There's enough depression in life, without subjecting fourteen year olds to naked creative types.

Yes, you could have googled, I suppose, but since Google has only been around for a flea's breath of time, I think we can all be forgiven for neglecting this fountain of knowledge on occasion.

I certainly don't like the implication that kids would be graded down if they didn't attend. That's plain wrong, and if I was to take up anything about that night, that would be my angle.

Original poster
psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 22:51

flame, not sure on the books, altho I recognise the name so possible (any more info so I can maybe recognise a pic maybe??)

the pictures are GORGEOUS

OP posts:
Ivykaty44 · 17/03/2009 22:52

lol - see nudity old people is probably really gross when your 14 and the 14 year old were all thinking it would have been better if they had kept their kit on

Original poster
psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 22:53

cornsilk, I am tyring to raise her right

desi, hard to google it when not given the name of the show!!!

OP posts:
edam · 17/03/2009 22:53

I'd be VERY pissed off if school took my child to something rated for 16+ without warning me. (I might well agree, but it's important to give parents the information so they can decide.)

Desiderata · 17/03/2009 22:54

It's a bit pants, really.

Given the same circumstances, I'd have posted the same OP.

Original poster
psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 22:57

desi, you would love this school then....

DD1's BF is taking GCSE geography.

she has been told that she is required to go on the geography trip, as it counts as 30% of her final grade.

non going means an automatic fail

it costs £500!!!

OP posts:
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 17/03/2009 23:01

Psychomum - thanks for this info. Now I know that when DD1 gets to Year 9 I need to make careful enquiries about the likely cost to me of her various GCSE options. So much for free fecking education.

Original poster
psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 23:13

exactly what I thought.

ask carefully tho, as we were not informed unitl after they took their options (crafty buggers)!!!

OP posts:
Stayingsunnygirl · 17/03/2009 23:24

I think that it is reasonable to expect the school to provide adequate information about any trip that the pupils are going on. I have never had so little information as you got, psychomum, and I wouldn't be at all happy about it either.

I think you would be quite within your rights to ask for an explanation from the school as to why:

  • the pupils and parents weren't given proper information about this performance.

and

  • why this particular show was chosen, given the nudity and the guideline 16+ rating.
hedgiemum · 17/03/2009 23:35

YANBU. I would be furious. Luckily for the school, you seem a nice, laidback mother who is taking a pragmatic view based on her not having been upset by it. But you still should have been given the information in advance, and her been able to opt out, at the least. I actually think it was unacceptable to take them, with a 16 level of guidance on the show. And I know what I'm talking about - I did drama GCSE, theatre studies A'level, went a to a professional drama school and ended up teaching theatre studies. A media studies teacher at a school I was teaching at was given an "official warning" for showing a 15 film to a group of GCSE pupils who were almost all still 14. She lost her job a year later for bullying the child whose parents made the complaint about the fim. Children of 14 are all very different, and some are very sensitive.
If I were you (but I'm not) I would cause a real stink so that the drama teacher doesn't do the same for another group next year.

Original poster
psychomum5 · 17/03/2009 23:47

I have parents evening next week (or maybe the week after....unsure), will raise it then.

OP posts:
hedgiemum · 17/03/2009 23:59

If you want them to take you seriously, and respond appropriately, it might be best to email/write letter to head of dept in next few days. If things aren't in writing, and pretty immediate, its too easy for them to be overlooked. Also, you don't want your focus removed on parents evening.
Just a suggestion though. You know the dynamics of that school.

Original poster
psychomum5 · 18/03/2009 00:06

true.........I wrote a letter to them last week about something else and got a very considered (and goodoutcome) phonecall from them after

will write tomorrow, or ring, see what they say.

OP posts:
cherryblossoms · 18/03/2009 00:14

Psychomum - I get what you're saying and I too would be cross. Possibly not about the nudieness, so much, but definitely about the lack of choice.

BUT

On the positive side ... Hofesh Shechter is amazing and actually, it's pretty cool that someone in the school booked them in to see such exciting contemporary dance. Especially if that's the direction she wants to take after school.

I think if they were taken to see this, the dc are being taken quite seriously as budding performers.

kickassangel · 18/03/2009 00:15

psychomum, many gcse exam boards insist that pupils experience a live professional drama, and there is often work attached to it as part of the course, after all they're studying the subject, and you expect them to experience it, at least once. (imagine doing english without ever reading a book)
BUT that should have been made clear at the outset - the schools i taught in all did at the yr 9 options eve.

they should also tell you if they're taking kids to see, or even watching in class, something like that. if i had a yr 10 class, and we were watching, say romeo & juliet (film), i would tell the class before hand. for older kids, if they were watching bits from an 18 rated film, we sent letters home at start of course explaining that it was possible they might see an 18 film, and could parents tell us of any objections,
so, YANBU to expect the info from the school, either about possible costs or experiences.

500 for a geog trip.!!! that's taking the piss biscuit. i've taught in 5 schools, NONE of them needed a trip that cost that much to cover the curriculum. outrageous.

cory · 18/03/2009 08:01

What kind of a school is this, psychomum? If a 500 trip was the requirement at our schools, I suspect half the pupils would have to fail their GCSEs, people just don't have that kind of money lying around. Is it a private school?

I'd be more worried about the money than the nudity tbh unless this is a school that only caters to the wealthy.

Original poster
psychomum5 · 18/03/2009 15:07

tis not a private school, just a normal school, altho it is proposing turning into a 'trust' school.

It is certainly not the type of school tho that has flush parents!

OP posts:
ThePFJ · 18/03/2009 15:16

psychomum - I wonder why the drama teacher chose to select that particular show as a part of their studies?? I am sure there are lots of things the teacher could have chosen that would not have made you upset on the content.

I would be as upset as you are about this one.
I'd complain to the headmaster. Ring up and ask to speak to them, asking why such a thing had to be choosen and why you were not fully informed. That is definately what I would do at this point. You have a right as a parent to know about it and make your own decisions. And the school should talk to that drama teacher about the sort of thing he or she is using to teach with for that age group. I do not feel I would be over reacting.

Berrie · 18/03/2009 15:32

It is my understandig that schools are only allowed to ask for a voluntary contribution for a trip that is vital to curriculum.
I know that it was ages ago but my Dad refused to pay for my geography field trip because of this. I was very embarrassed.

ThePFJ · 18/03/2009 15:38

LOL Berrie poor you. I think you are right though. Next time the school ask me for money for a 'vital trip' think I might send LO to school with 42p and a fluff covered sweet as a 'contribution'.

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