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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To report neighbours to police

29 replies

mariemarie · 15/03/2009 22:19

We have a problem with our neighbours. They are both in there 60s and up until last summer we got on fine.

The problems started when our children started to play out in our front garden last summer. They scootered along the front of our house up and down the street and either me or DH would be out on the front with them. Anyway, our neighbours daughter would regularly visit her parents and she drives far too fast up the estate and wizzes up their drive, which is obviously right at the side of our front garden.

This was happening regularly so I politely went round one day and asked if she could watch her speed a bit especially as the children were playing out. My children play with the children next door but-one, so they are regularly passing the end of next doors drive.

Basically, she didnt respond and I left, but she continued to drive fast. Eventually, it flared up one day when she nearly knocked me down whilst I was stood at the bottom of her parents drive (I was not on their property). Anyway, it has all got very ugly between us and them, resulting in my neighbour and me having a bit of a shouting match, which I am not proud of and she actually threatened to kill me last summer and her DH had to restrain her. I wanted to report her to the police just to make a point that I would not tolerate this but my DH persuaded me to let things go.

Anyway, we have kept out of there way and not really seen them much but a few weeks ago my DH was up a ladder at the front of her house when he heard something hit our car which was parked on the pavement at the front of our house. When he looked down, our neighbour was walking passed with her dog and had a walking stick. Whilst we cant prove it we are certain she wacked the car with the stick. Again, we let it go.

However, whilst driving up the street the other day with my children in the car, she was driving down and put 2 fingers up at us for no reason. She has since done this again whilst I was getting shopping out of the car. I just told her that she was a loonatic and that if she continued to be a nuisance then I would report her to the police.

We are getting a new car next month and I am convinced she will "accidentaly" scratch it. We cant keep it on the drive because our other car is on it. I am dreading summer coming when the children are playing out. She obviously doesnt like children.

Oh, and their house has been for sale for 2 years now and they are struggling to sell it because it has been overpriced.

Anyway, I guess what I want is a bit of advice on how to deal with them. DH just keeps saying ignore her but I wish I could just register a complaint with the policy just so she knows she cant get away with this.

Its all totally ridiculous, they look like a very respectable couple and all this could have been avoided if their daughter just drove carefully. I cant beleive they cant see how dangerous they are being.

OP posts:
traceybath · 15/03/2009 22:22

I'd phone the police - mostly about the speeding issues but just to alert them to a potential problem.

They may be able to give you some advice eg keep a diary of everything that happens.

Horrid for you though - hope they sell their house soon and move.

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 15/03/2009 22:25

Well you either report her speeding to the police or you wait untill it kills her or worse someone's child.

It's a no brainer really.

trixymalixy · 15/03/2009 22:29

Be careful about making a complaint to the police about a neighbour. If you ever want to sell and they are still there then you will have to declare it.

mariemarie · 15/03/2009 22:31

Well I did ring the local council to ask about speeding problems and they said that actually, the road we live on is classed as a 30mph zone. Even though we are on an estate and on quite a sharp bend. The council agreed that it was "probably" unsafe to actually drive at 30mph but as there have been no reported accidents they cannot deem it to be unsafe.

I also asked about speed bumps and could not beleive it when they said that its really difficult to get speed bumps put in because of all the objections from people. When I queried who the hell would object to speed bumps they said that alot of people do because they say it damages their car and also, apparantly, it is noisy for the people who live directly opposite the speed bump!!

I feel so mad about it, I just hope its their grandchildren or dog that gets knocked down and not mine!!

OP posts:
beanieb · 15/03/2009 22:34

Erm, I think that last comment about their grandchildren and dog was a little harsh.

If it were me I would ignore it. The sticking the fingers up is just stupid but easy to ignore. Could you swap the cars round so the older one is outside?

mariemarie · 15/03/2009 22:35

Thanks Trixy, we had thought about that actually. My DH spoke to neighbour and said that if they continued to be a nuisance then we would report them and THEY would have to declare it when selling THEIR house.

I know this would not be in OUR interest either because we want them to go, but, we know how much they are desperate to move nearer to their daughter and so we thought this may do the trick. Obviously not.

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 15/03/2009 22:37

You hope it's their grandchildren who gets knocked down??!! Jeez.....

mariemarie · 15/03/2009 22:37

Beanie, I dont think it was harsh at all. Obviously I wouldnt wish for anyone to be knocked down but I think it would serve them right to cause damage to their own. They are reckless.

OP posts:
beanieb · 15/03/2009 22:39

hmmm, ok.

As for the question. I don't think you have grounds to report the neighbours. Their daughter is the one driving too fast (is she doing over 30?) so if anyone should be reported it's her.

mariemarie · 15/03/2009 22:40

No Tiffany, I am not wishing their grandchildren get knocked down at all. Am just convinced that its just a matter of time before there is a serious accident and am saying I hope its with them and not with mine. Am not wishing they knock anyone down at all. Sorry if it came across that way.

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 15/03/2009 22:41

Just report the daughter!!! And as dh says......just ignore the rest .

mariemarie · 15/03/2009 22:42

Yes beanie, but the mother was the one that jumped in our garden and threatened me during the summer and her DH had to restrain her. This all happened in front of other people in the street aswell, so we have witnessess to that.

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 15/03/2009 22:48

Why did she threaten you tho???

nametaken · 15/03/2009 22:53

Look, the next time she does anything wrong (and it is the daughter you have to report, not her parents, your neighbours) then ring the police. Even if she parks on the pavement.

At the very least the police will give her car a good going over, check tyres, insurance tax etc etc. If she's horrible, nasty and driving like a maniac and sticking fingers up, there's every chance she's not a responsible adult and the police will find something.

GypsyMoth · 15/03/2009 22:59

When you're stood still surrounded by kids then a vehicle moving at only 15 mph can seem overly fast!! How would you know her correct speed? As a former police officer myself I cAn tell you a) she needs to be caught speeding,with proof and b) without comitting a recordable offence then police can't give her car a 'going over' randomly!!!!!!
LOL at the thought!!

nametaken · 15/03/2009 23:18

Um, I've had the police pull me over and check my tax and tyres so they can give your car a going over.

A "former police officer"?

beanieb · 15/03/2009 23:20

"Yes beanie, but the mother was the one that jumped in our garden and threatened me during the summer and her DH had to restrain her." So you should have reported it then maybe. At the moment I don't think there's anything you can report, and I can't see what it would achieve!

GypsyMoth · 15/03/2009 23:22

But she would be visiting parents? Op calls police and says,'daughters here now'.....police arrive (blue light?sirens?)leap out and inspect her car?

beanieb · 15/03/2009 23:24

isn't it the mother (neighbour) who was sticking up the fingers?

GypsyMoth · 15/03/2009 23:26

Yes,it is beanie......

screamingabdab · 16/03/2009 08:42

Is there a neighbour mediation service in your area? Might be worth contacting the council to ask about it. Sorry, have no experience of this myself, but it might be worth a try before getting to police.

YANBU, by the way. People are twats, aren't they?

hefferlump · 16/03/2009 13:24

Hi everyone I'm completely new here and this is my virgin post!
I've read the dilema and unless the OP or neighbours are going to move house then I can see only one option that stands a chance of working....... and I'll probably be laughed out of Mumsnet for this!

The only thing left is for the OP to use some reverse psychology. She/he would have to approach the neighbours - preferably when all are present and say a really BIG sorry for the original complaint. Say sorry and go on to say how they were perhaps being overprotective about the kids and how they really wish they could all be friends again. Lots of sad eyes, lots of sincere apologies and it must be 100% believable.
I know and you know that this is not really the way we feel but the neighbours DONT

BitOfFun · 16/03/2009 13:30

Good idea hefferlump...

screamingabdab · 16/03/2009 13:34

hefferlump Deffo worth a try ...., if OP can stomach the idea.

Welcome!

DaphneMoon · 16/03/2009 13:36

The police can pull you over any time they like and check your car. There is nothing that says they can't.

I feel for your OP, there is nothing worse than having twatty neighbours like that. I really don't know what you can do. The only way she will be stopped is by being caught speeding on your road.

I like the reverse psychology bit Heffer but the trouble is if they are that awful, sometimes you just don't want to say nice things to them and let them think they have won. Having said that, it it helps sell their house it might be just worth it.

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