What things irrationally wind the hell out of you?

[ElfOnTheTopShelf]

I HATE listening to the BBC news in the morning, when the news readers say "its is EXACTLY half past six" because I always end up shouting "IT IS NOT!!" because it surely can never be EXACTLY unless they string out the sixxxxxx until it is exactly that time.

I get annoyed when people talk about the coins and say that the Queen is on the FRONT of the coin, she is on the back. Because if you were looking at all the pictures of all the coins, you'd put the Queen down to see the pics, therefore she is the back of the coin. And its only "heads and tails" because its a picture of her head.

When I'm really stroppy, I get annoyed at the Kool Kids sign near my house. If they wanted to use alliteration, use Cool Children, surely?!

So... what gets your goat for no reason

tbh,last saw JK and the knuckle dragger's when i was on mat leave.convinced it is insidious govt campaign to drive us back to work

all the fuckwits,hairy handed growlers,and who da daddy sound bites

eeek- straight back to work

tbh,last saw JK and the knuckle dragger's when i was on mat leave.convinced it is insidious govt campaign to drive us back to work

all the fuckwits,hairy handed growlers,and who da daddy sound bites

eeek- straight back to work

Victoria Beckham appearing in every celeb mag EVERY bloody week! Arrghhh!! And now she has a fashion label. She NEVER wears casual clothes, even for a trip to the bloody shops! She has mental issues I'm sure. Why does everyone love her so much? She never smiles either.

I am waiting for her to fall and break a leg in those stupid shoes she wears...silly woman

Farking tube announcements with unnecessary verbiage. 'This train will now terminate here'. This train has always been terminating here, it's not a surprise, you don't need to say 'now'.

And today 'due to the late overrunning of necessary engineering works' ... As opposed to unnecessary engineering works?!

I had quite a bad tube journey today ...

gwyneth paltrow and chris martin.whiny macrobiotic fuckwits

5inabed, my MIL says kitchenette, it drives me insane. She also calls our kitchen 'the back kitchen', when it is actually at the front of the house. WTF??

Also the way she says, "Fil has just gone to 'seek' so and so", meaning, he has gone to pick them up. What? Are they lost then? I hope he took a thermos and a St. Bernard.

Talking with your mouth full. I dont want to see your chewed up food and have it spat upon me, thankyou. Nothing is so important that you cant wait until you swallow FFS.

The finger-up-against-your-nose-projectile-snot-snort. In the street.

hun, mate, luv ...

anyone who needs to intersperse their slow stream of consciousness utterances with 'yeah' 'like' 'fuck' 'fucking' or any variant of 'you know'. Double on phones, trains and buses.

Oh, you know mate, I could just like, fucking rant on about this fucking irritation forever, know wot I mean,hun

DP filling the kettle up to the brim to make two cups of tea. I have to ask each time when the guests are arriving and yet he still does it..... grrrrrr

Polly Pocket has clothes these days???

I needed a magnefiying glass to find her when DD was polly pocket mad (1990)

'Outside space'. It's a garden.

Vunnerable. There's an l there, not two ns.

The way my DM over-pronounces French words e.g restrong, jooovay (duvet).

Restauranteur. There is no n there.

Listening to dh eating.

People who say '..and I turned around and said...'

People (I include ds1 here) who liberally sprinkle their sentences with the word 'like'.

My sister calling me "Mrs Magoo" everytime I wear my effing glasses! FFS grow up woman! Yes I wear glasses - get over it.

fashion magazines/stylists that talk about "a jean" or "a trouser"

NHS bullshit speak, "care bundle" "care pathway"

My manager who always wants meetings to be "quorate" what is this word!!!?

Also puts "caveats" on meeting minutes

Chewing with your mouth open
People who can't hold a knife and form correctly.
People who seem to have no indicators on the cars or forget to use them,.
Cyclists who stuff it up for the rest of us by not obeying the road rules.
People in audis who never ever indicate and try to run me over when I'm on my bike.
Dolls that do wees and poos etc.
Bratz dolls - skanky big footed freaks
Oh I could go on for hours...

pingviner - conversation I overheard on the train last week:

"Yeah, man, y'know, dass fucked up shit, man. Fucked up. Like, really fucked up, you know what I mean? It's totally fucked up shit, man. Yeah, dass fucked up. Shiiiiiiit. Fucked up, yeahhh, fucked up shit..." This went on for twenty minutes and by the end of it I still did not know what the fucked up shit was. I wanted to punch the man. Use words. Real words.

Other pet peeves

Noisy eaters - I don't want to listen to your revolting mouth noises
Gulpy or slurpy drinkers
Sniffing
Gobbing on the street - you filthy creatures, stop it
Shop staff you don't make eye contact and ignore you when you are paying
Shoe shops where there are 300 staff trying to help you when all you want to do is shove your feet in some pretty sandals for 10 seconds without being hassled but when you actually want to buy something, they completely disappear.
People who insist on playing loud sweary music with your windows down.

Also, over use of emoticons

It's and its being muddled up... in a museum.

People who think shooting for sport is cruel, but happily tuck into value chickens.

My Mum's habit of always finishing my sentences (wrongly, at that. Sometimes she'll have 3 shots before shutting up and just letting me finish). tbf she knows she does it, and is always penitent after.

People sitting on a duvet when I'm under it. We have a super enormous one now, to avoid the situation.

DH lecturing me on how the politician/economist/expert du jour on the telly is wrong, and why, when I just want to watch the frigging news without the running commentary. Or my mother asking "what's happening now? Why?" through films/tv drama, which makes it hard to know, either.

My MIL sending me a birthday card the wrong date, and when politely told it's not my birthday, saying doubtfully "are you sure?"

And the washing up in places without dishwashers. Worst job ever.

Oh! Discreet and discrete. Complimentary and complementary.

txt spk. It's irritating. Oh yes.

Microsoft Word agitatedly asking if a fragment is okay, and spellchecking words following Mr, Mrs etc.

The phrase "I am loving".

Shop assistants who don't speak or look at you, just gesture at the total on the till. I always make a point of saying "thank you" loudly and firmly at every occasion.

DD1's stepmother buying her cheap tacky clothes that wouldn't look out of place on a streetwalker. They tend to end up in those charity bags that wind a previous poster up .

People dropping the final "g" off words - ie. lovin, walkin, shoppin. Some people even write like this! Argghhhh.

I used to work with a girl who always used to say "have you rang...?" instead of "have you rung...?" Drove me bonkers.

Hmmm - must stop thinking of thing that drive me mad, am supposed to be making myself feel sleepy so I can go back to bed (6wks pg and have been awake since 3.30am...).

minxofmancunia - I know what quorate means do you want me to tell you?

Bit poncy in a work situation though...