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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DH to leave DS alone in the bath even for a nanosecond

47 replies

Stefka · 20/02/2009 18:47

Caught DH nipping out of the bathroom to go and get a towl. I went mental. DH said he could hear him and it really was only for a couple of seconds. DS is 16 months, not walking yet and I just think he should never do this. DH says I am over reacting. He is my first baby so maybe I am being a bit OTT but I just don't see the need to leave the bathroom and all the guidelines say you should never do it.

OP posts:
PerArduaAdNauseum · 20/02/2009 18:49

YANBU - I'd be taking DH to a quiet place and shouting explaining how quietly children can drown.

racmac · 20/02/2009 18:49

I think YABU - he is not going to drown in the couple of seconds it takes to grab a towel

HeadFairy · 20/02/2009 18:50

Hmmm depends... I have done this with ds, but he's been walking since he was 10 months (he's 17 months) and he's also does swimming lessons where he goes underwater each lesson. He's also physically very strong, I've only done it a couple of times for a nanosecond, (reached around to towel cupboard in the hallway). However I can see how YANBU if your ds isn't walking and isn't so used to water.

I'll get off the fence now and see what everyone else thinks

Leo9 · 20/02/2009 18:50

I didn't leave ds alone for a second and nor did DH, until he was about four years old! If you're in the over-reacting club then I'm a founder member. I just think however infinitessimally small the risk, it's just not worth it - get all you need before you start the bath, it's not hard!

Original poster
Stefka · 20/02/2009 18:52

That's what I Was thinking - I just don't think it is hard to get yourself organised before hand. I realise that he was probably fine in that time but still you never know - he has tried to climb out of the bath too before and we have tiles - he could have hurt himself.

OP posts:
Thunderduck · 20/02/2009 18:52

YANBU.

A mother on another forum I visit left her 1 year old dd for a few seconds while letting the dog out. She returned to find her dd under the water, her dd almost died. It isn't worth the risk imho.

bamboostalks · 20/02/2009 18:53

Never, not even for a second. Absolute golden rule, no exceptions.

sickofsocalledexperts · 20/02/2009 18:53

he should get the towel first, bloody stupid men are about this sort of stuff!

Twims · 20/02/2009 18:53

racmac a child can drown in an inch of water in a couple of seconds.

littleboysblue · 20/02/2009 18:54

YANBU I had this problem with my dp a few times too, in fact, I banned him from bathing ds in the end. That might sound a bit harsh to some but not when the flip side is the posibility of my son losing his life.......
IMHO a child of that age should not be left for even a second unattended in any amount of water.
My ds had a habit of trying to blow the bubbles on the surface of the water so would dip his head to and most often in the water, so while dp was getting a towel or putting a nappy in a bin, anything could have happened. A 16 month old would not (I think) be able to get out of the water if he fell face first in there.
If you are indoors and he has forgotten to take a towel, he can shout for you to fetch one can't he?

Original poster
Stefka · 20/02/2009 19:18

Exactly! I think what I am going to do is set the bath up for him from now on - make sure the towl etc is there so no reason for him to leave. Seeing him nip out like that made me feel ill - it's the whole what if of the situation.

OP posts:
goodnightmoon · 20/02/2009 19:21

i'm sure i saw an advertisement about this - to never leave them alone for a second. a lot of this advice may seem alarmist, but this is one i am heeding because it really can happen fast.

Rindercella · 20/02/2009 19:22

YANBU. Just not worth the risk. If your DH has been disorganised & forgotten a towel, then it will do your DS absolutely no harm at all to be carried from bath to wherever the towel is.

My 17 month DD is strong, has been walking for ages, does swimming every week, etc., still would not leave her alone in the bath. EVER.

bellabelly · 20/02/2009 19:31

Absolutely not being unreasonable. A few months ago, one of my twins slipped in bath and went under the water. I was in the bathroom at the time (right next to the bath, towel-drying his brother.

He very nearly hit his head on the tap and ended up totally under the water in what I thought was a pretty shallow bath. The terror on his face was awful. It felt like time slowed right down as I LEAPT to get him up out of the water. He was v upset (but no harm done, thank god) but I hate to think what might have happened if I'd decided to take his brother to the bedroom - 10 secs down the corridor in our tiny flat. I won't ever risk doing THAT again! And if he's hit his head on the tap, he could have been knocked out. Horrible to even think about it.

bloss · 20/02/2009 19:31

Message withdrawn

spicemonster · 20/02/2009 19:33

I do it all the time but I'm an inept mother as anyone will tell you. In my defence, my flat has a tiny hallway and I can see or hear my DS all the time.

Katiestar · 20/02/2009 19:34

YANBU
Apart from the risk of drowning they can easily get scalded if they turn on hot tap.Climbing and slipping are also risks

DandyLioness · 20/02/2009 19:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lalalonglegs · 20/02/2009 19:49

You can not drown in a few seconds, you can get a bit wet. He is 16mo - he can sit up unsupported and roll over if he falls down. I think it is not something worth worrying about for the time it takes to fetch a towel (unless your husband left the house to buy one).

bergentulip · 20/02/2009 19:49

YABU

A couple of seconds to get a towel....?
I'd do it. But then I must be a bad mother too.

lilymolly · 20/02/2009 19:51

YABU- I have done it many times.

Can I join the bad mothers club

chatname · 20/02/2009 19:56

this advice from the US suggests you shouldn't leave a baby in a bathtub even for a second

Sassybeast · 20/02/2009 20:01

YANBU - DD did once and DD tried to stand up, fell against the tap and split her lip wide open. Luckily it wasn't more serious but it could have been. Just not worth the risk - how hard it is to grab PJS, towel and nappy before you put them in ?

MarlaSinger · 20/02/2009 20:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ilikeyoursleeves · 20/02/2009 20:44

YANBU- I wouldn't ever risk it even for a second. I wouldn't even want to imagine how I'd feel if something happened to my DS if I nipped out for just a second, and it COULD happen- slip, swallow water in a second.