to think that rather than complain about larger families, or suggest ways of ridding the world of disabled people, those people should offer to rid the world of themselves........

[psychomum5]

something that has been bugging me now for days..................there has been lots on the papers this week about the twat complaining of large families and suggesting a 'ban' on people having more than two children, as it has a drain on the economy anad the world, plus last month another so-called 'expert' suggested ways of identifying yet more 'disabilities' and therfore implying that people would want to abort them.

now, 1), more children being born is actually a good thing, and much needed, as the population is now getting older and the workforce needed to pay the pensions of the elderly will soon be smaller than demand (IYGEWIM)

and 2), on the part fo the disabled............surely that is subjective to how we enable people to exist in our society?? you are only disabled by those around you if they cannot enable you to exist properly in your enviroment. (I hope I am making myself clear.........it is very hard to write down what is in my head at times).

soooooooooooooooooo

all those who think we are draining society, well, surely they should then suggest ridding society of themselves, especially if they are over the age of retirement, as they are not exactly making a contribution anymore going on the way they state you can only contribute if you work and earn money.

people who have twattish opinions really have no worth do they

The envioromentalist thing was interesting, because on first sight without previously considering it, it made sense - BUT....
This week DS (9) has had a large number of other boys round to our house for his birthday tea And WHAT an interesting dynamic! In his class they are mostly eldest siblings - and the ones that seemed to go hyper and have no idea of boundaries ( eg in cushion throwing - did not understand when they were getting dangerous - even when reptpeatedly reminded) were the 'only' children of whom there were three, and a boy with a younger sister, but where there is a four year age gap. For those who had younger siblings where there was an age gap of two-ish years, the behaviour was still boyish, fun, exuberant - , lively, physical but not hyper. And one incident which could be construed as mild bullying (because I was summoned to intervene before it got worse), was perpetrated by two singletons who just did not understand their behaviour was unacceptable - they were sorry when the other boy cried, and apologised, but really did not actually seem to 'get it' so I'm not convinced they really understand not to repeat it.
So my limited sociological observation seemed to indicate that larger famlies make for more civilised society. (Can I have a proper research grant please????)

MrsGB, you may actually be on to something there. they do indeed do studies don;t they on 'middle-child-syndrome' and they also say that 'onlies' are more often than not far more driven in the work place, older siblings strive more etc.

maybe for the sake of world peace larger families are needed.

Plus I also see the differences in families with a disabled/health restricted child. the difference in empathy from siblings is very noticable!

PM5 - yes it was a real 'light bulb' moment for me, because on 'normal' playdates there are usually only one or two children,ad I don't generally watch them playing but with 13 (!) it was noticeable how differently they behaved. In fact one of the boys there has three younger siblings, including a disabled sibling 18 months younger - and he is a very thoughtful, funny boy, who I would say is the most likeable child in the group... Had just never before considered why.
Of course, it may be that parents who choose to have lots of children, and stay together long enough to do so are nice and co-operative/compromising types who pass on those genes to their children...
Perhaps it should be like carbon trading, those who don't want children should be able to sell their right to have kids to those who want to buy

"Plus I also see the differences in families with a disabled/health restricted child. the difference in empathy from siblings is very noticable!"
that is so true, ds for one has a lot more patience, and my friends children just take it all in their stride.

This thread has made me think of a family I used to know( they moved)
they had 4 children and the oldest one was an absulote sweetie, he would get so upset if dd was upset and bend ove backwards to find out what was wrong.
his sister(2 yrs younger) was a real live wire but a delight and would behave.
but the then youngest omg she was a handful

• well , thats it im buggered then ,have loads of kids and two have SN. phsyco someone threatened to run over your kids . loving the valentines names!

lol at loads

Drplus8....understatement of he year I think!

yep, idiot lady at the school gates had a row with me over the fact that her 5yr old son was out at night on the main road, DH almost ran him over (luckily didn;t), and she took him home. she then came at me very viciously the following day saying her son was half dead because of my DH (only she had just taken him to school), and ranted at me throwing milk at me. I (in my oh-so-great-moment), called he a stupid cow, then walked away.

she went to pull my head back (I had very long hair at that point), and said that my children were the bane of the estate, and that next time she saw them she was gonna kill them, run them down, etc etc.

so I slapped her!!!

and then rang the police and handed myself in as I was so mortified at myself.

the police came, DD1 told him that mummy went psycho, they went to the other lady, she attecked the policeman, he came and told me that I did the right thing (off the record tho).

and so that is the story of my name

wow

How many kids do you need to have before you're classed as a "large" family?

I totally agree with OP BTW. YA in no way BU

this argument is totally flawed for the 'west' psychomum

i simply ignore it

some academics actually say the west needs more children

i am happy with that

I dont fly - i give birth

. omg what a uberbeatch!.

stay frosty- congrats on cooking buba! , twos not so many though, wierd mate you got had. she has issooos!sounds like . revel in your excitement!x

must be so hard not to be able to concieve! i feel really sad for the girl now!, pehaps she'll have more luck in the future with a new partner, and come running to you looking for advice on all things baby!

she was mean. I never condone slapping anyone, but she threatened my cubs, so mummy lion roared!!!

Stayfrosty, rude lady, altho in some ways I am guessing her bitterness is understandable. I lost a girl who I thought was a very good friend (she was my bridesmaid and also godmum to DD10 when I announced DD3 was on her way as she disapproved so much. hey ho, people like that lead very unhappy lives.

Live and let live IMVHO,and accept others for who they are and what they can teach you

'Plus I also see the differences in families with a disabled/health restricted child. the difference in empathy from siblings is very noticable! '

Thats true- ds2 is a marvel; always offering his scarf to someone cold or whatever, a little sweetheart.

also, isn't caitlin moran part of a large family? Her columns in the Times are what make Monday mornings bearable for me. If she had been a singleton many lives outside her own immediate circle would be diminished...

peachy, I think it has helped mine having had to live in a family with DD3 and her frequent poorly episodes. they have much more compassion than other children I know of that have no true idea of what it is like.

mrsGB, another reason for larger families....................good stories