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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think 6 year olds don't need mobile phones

45 replies

knockedup · 05/02/2009 09:53

Just felt compelled to post this here today as finding this out last night infuriated me!

DH's sister has a 6 year old girl. DH's sister and her husband in my opinion are lazy parents. They don't seem to do much as a family like eating together or going on weekend outings....but when it comes to material possessions - wow she's got the lot - she's got a tv,dvd,wii console in her room (and has since she was 4) every disney dvd ever made, but not a single book - for Xmas she got a nintendo DS - the hand held thing - and just sat staring at that all through xmas day including xmas dinner - (she actually would only sit and eat with us if she could play with it hence not having to make any conversation)

Needless to say she hasn't much of a personality. She doesn't look you in the eye and the only words that come out of her mouth usually start with "i want....". - and I would go as far as to say I don't really hold much hope for her as a teenager and young adult at this rate

Anyway - she's been given a mobile phone since starting back at school this jan and me and DH were shocked. DH's mum obviously agrees with her daughters parenting as she tries to push that kind of stuff onto us (like so and so is getting a DS, would our 4yo dd want a DS for xmas as well....er no!)

I know they look at us like we're too strict. And I know you need to move with the modern times somewhat but I really don't get what a 6 year old needs a mobile for. I didn't have one when I was 6. If I was going to play at a friends house for instance then my Mum would have arranged it with my friends mum - not me arranging it and texting everyone concerned....in shitey text speak!

What's the world coming too? Am I Being Unreasonable?

OP posts:
VJay · 05/02/2009 09:56

I don't think you are being unreasonable, my ds is 6 and it's never even crossed my mind to give him a mobile! But I do feel sorry for the little girl, it sounds like she is being made to grow up too fast, what a shame

Seeline · 05/02/2009 10:00

YANBU - I would only consider a mobile for my DCs once they are out and about on their own and may need to contact us to pick them up from somewhere or need assistance of some sort. Mind you they would probably be out of luck as MY mobile is only ever switched on if I am using it for an emergency situation

12StoneNeedsToBe10 · 05/02/2009 10:02

YANBU - DS has a mobile but only once he started going to the park with his mates and without me (he was about 10 or so). Even then he never used it that much, it was for my benefit so I could check up on him every few milliseconds

Idrankthechristmasspirits · 05/02/2009 10:04

YANBU about 6 yr olds not needing mobile phones. However you also sound quite spiteful in your op. If i were your sil i would be livid if i heard you talking about my daughter in the way that your op describes her.

alardi · 05/02/2009 10:06

Even most adults don't "need" a mobile phone.
But I don't understand why it infuritates you that this child has it. Their child to raise as they see fit.

Are you actually peeved instead about the pressure being put on you to do the same?

Squirdle · 05/02/2009 10:08

YANBU...6 yr olds do not need a mobile phone! DS2 doesn't even have a DS yet (although he keeps begging me for one )

It's not the little girls fault she is the way she is, it's the parents!

MrsSeanBean · 05/02/2009 10:09

YANBU. But I think mobile phones have become a kind of toy, so in that sense maybe yab a bit u.

I have to agree that they are completely unnecessary in the 'communications' sense. And it is very sad that the little girl has no books, YANBU at all there.

My parents didn't have a TV when I was growing up, this forced us to read, and how glad I am that it did. Even now I dislike TV for it's tendency to switch your brain off/ stop you thinking.
The only disadvantage of not having a TV was that it was a bit more difficult (but not impossible) to relate to your peers.

MrsSeanBean · 05/02/2009 10:11

aaarghhhh - its not it's - aaarghhhhh... what is it about keyboards that seem to force this hideuos apostrohpe error (sorry)

fraggletits · 05/02/2009 10:13

yes it's the pressure that we're getting from that side of the family and the influence their dd has on our dd who totally looks up to her big cousin.

They're using mod cons to replicate love imo. We can see the damage it's doing but they can't and yeah it makes me feel spiteful against them, but hey familiarity and all that.

poopscoop · 05/02/2009 10:14

my ds had one at 6 he doesnt use it, it was an old phone and i put a fiver on it at the time which he then managed to spend playing on some interactive game . He had it as is older siblings had one and he wanted to be the same.

It was a 5 minute wonder and is now back in the drawer for our emergency use.

Certainly wopuld not go and buy one for him.

Idrankthechristmasspirits · 05/02/2009 10:14

Am confused. Why the namechange?

poopscoop · 05/02/2009 10:17

who me? havent changed.

VJay · 05/02/2009 10:18

Fraggletits are you knocked up, you've got me confused too.

poopscoop · 05/02/2009 10:19

oh i see!

fraggletits · 05/02/2009 10:21

doh name changed recently and the old one keeps popping up as my current one! Me and technology!! Maybe i should have had a computer when I was 6!

AquarianMum · 05/02/2009 10:26

I agree with you. My dd is 6 and she hasn't even asked for a mobile phone - don't think anyone is her class has one. She does have a DS - but I think novelty wore off after 3mnths. Luckily my dd is an outdoor type - much rather be outside on her bike than indoors on computers etc.

PerArduaAdNauseum · 05/02/2009 10:35

I agree with the OP (whoever you are) - tbh, your niece sounds neglected. Clear case of poor little rich kid?

lilymolly · 05/02/2009 10:39

I also agree with OP
Sounds like a nightmare.

There is NO WAY i would allow a child to sit and play with a ds over dinner and no way would I give dd a mobile phone until she is at least 21!!

RubyRioja · 05/02/2009 10:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Katiestar · 05/02/2009 13:44

My 2 eldest who are at secondary school have mobile phones and TBH they hardly ever use them as phones-more the camera fuction,games,MPIas toys use player and so on.I don't think a 6 yr old needs a phone but I don't see it as evidence of bad parenting.
On the other hand being so judgmental about this family and to write off this poor little girl at 6 makes me more concerned about your own ability to bring up children.

janeite · 05/02/2009 13:51

I can't think of any reason in the world why a six year old would need/be given a mobile.

Seona1973 · 05/02/2009 14:21

my inlaws gave my dd a mobile for xmas (she is 5!). They do live 300 miles away and maybe they think of it as a way to keep in contact, although dd is very phone phobic and rarely speaks to her dad on it never mind anyone else. She has used it once when grandad rang her and she has played some of the games on it. At present it is lying unused on the kitchen worktop and will probably stay there until it runs out of charge and gets put on the charger again.

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 05/02/2009 14:24

Bloody hell dd1 has got to be the most spoilt little girl I have ever met she has everything. The ds, the tv, the dvd player, a family wii etc. BUT even she has not got a mobile, nor will she be getting one for her next birthday and she is not allowed to play her ds whilst eating.

Getting her a mobile phone has never crossed my mind nor has she ever asked for one.

tiredsville · 05/02/2009 14:28

I agree with Katiestar.

diedandgonetodevon · 05/02/2009 14:35

There is no reason a 6yr old needs a phone IMO (or any of the other gadgets you mentioned either)

I think as a teenage when they start going out and about for hours then it is good to be able to get hold of them, but not before then really.

I just hope I can stick to my guns and not cave in to pressure to give my son stuff like this too young. Children should be out in the garden playing and running around and making friends, not in their rooms looking at a screen for hours on end.