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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think 6 year olds don't need mobile phones

45 replies

knockedup · 05/02/2009 09:53

Just felt compelled to post this here today as finding this out last night infuriated me!

DH's sister has a 6 year old girl. DH's sister and her husband in my opinion are lazy parents. They don't seem to do much as a family like eating together or going on weekend outings....but when it comes to material possessions - wow she's got the lot - she's got a tv,dvd,wii console in her room (and has since she was 4) every disney dvd ever made, but not a single book - for Xmas she got a nintendo DS - the hand held thing - and just sat staring at that all through xmas day including xmas dinner - (she actually would only sit and eat with us if she could play with it hence not having to make any conversation)

Needless to say she hasn't much of a personality. She doesn't look you in the eye and the only words that come out of her mouth usually start with "i want....". - and I would go as far as to say I don't really hold much hope for her as a teenager and young adult at this rate

Anyway - she's been given a mobile phone since starting back at school this jan and me and DH were shocked. DH's mum obviously agrees with her daughters parenting as she tries to push that kind of stuff onto us (like so and so is getting a DS, would our 4yo dd want a DS for xmas as well....er no!)

I know they look at us like we're too strict. And I know you need to move with the modern times somewhat but I really don't get what a 6 year old needs a mobile for. I didn't have one when I was 6. If I was going to play at a friends house for instance then my Mum would have arranged it with my friends mum - not me arranging it and texting everyone concerned....in shitey text speak!

What's the world coming too? Am I Being Unreasonable?

OP posts:

ilovetochat · 05/02/2009 14:40

my niece is like this, she is 8 and has tv/dvd in her room, mobile, ds, wii fit and millions of toys/clothes and a themed bedroom.
i think she is spoiled but not her fault.
my only problem is that now niece has taken to giving dd her old toys etc and has said she will give her all her old bedroom toys, curtains,duvet as its too babyish for her. i don't want dd having the tv/dvd (barbie i think) or the pink themed duvet/curtains, but i don't know how to say no thanks without upsetting niece and possibly her parents.

Miggsie · 05/02/2009 15:40

Veruca Salt, Veruca Salt....
It was not all her fault.

That sort of parenting pisses me off too.

fraggletits · 05/02/2009 16:04

sorry to concern you katiestar. guess i should have been clearer - our niece is an unhappy child, the school bully - you can't leave her alone in a room with other children as they usually end up punched or kicked. she has screaming tantrums which I thought by 6 should have lessened alot by now. last time i saw her she screamed at her mother to shut up and my SIL seemingly couldn't give a toss - just brushes it off as 'that's kids'

she's awake most nights watching gord knows on her tv....

i'm not saying i'm a perfect parent and my 2 have their moments but i believe in staggering all these 'big' presents like tv's in rooms and phones til they're old enough to appreciate them.

although having said that it's interesting to read that everyone here who got their kids the phones - it seems the kids lose interest after the novelty wears off and maybe i'm worrying unduly about what affect my dd's older cousin will actually have on her.

Lotster · 05/02/2009 16:22

YANBU - a 6 year old has no business with a mobile.

PlumBumMum · 05/02/2009 16:27

I totally agree with you knockedup, my dd is nearly 8 only got a ds for xmas there, she does not need or be allowed a mobile until actually I don't know when, as I didn't have one until I was in my 20's!

Frasersmum123 · 05/02/2009 16:32

My 7 year old doesnt have a mobile phone, I would never think of buying him one - he does have an old one of mine which doesnt work which he uses when he plays 'Taxi Drivers'!

fraggletits · 05/02/2009 16:35

ilovetochat - that's a problem for us too - surprise surprise my niece is a big Bratz fan. her bedroom is bratz themed. Disney Princess now and again maybe but Bratz look like hookers and we've been offered stuff which I really don't like but don't want to hurt anyones feelings either!

fraggletits · 05/02/2009 16:36

i was 22 when i had my first mobile plumbummum!

RockinSockBunnies · 05/02/2009 16:38

YANBU!!!! I can't bear the idea that 6 year old has so many mind-numbing gadgets. There's no way my daughter would ever be allowed a TV/DVD etc in her room. We have a TV downstairs (unfortunately - wish we could get rid of the thing) but it's only allowed at weekends.

I may be judgey but if I go into a house where the living room is dominated by an enormous plasma type TV with gadgets all over the house but no books, I inwardly shudder.

Why on earth would a child have so stuff in the first place? Also, surely it's just a way to fob off your children - no need to pay attention to them or interact with them if they're glued to a screen.

I'd also worry about the possible risk of brain tumours from mobile phone usage at such an age. I try to use mine as little as possible and don't let DD use it.

Poor child

PlumBumMum · 05/02/2009 17:29

[grins] bratz look like hookers couldn't have said it better myself fraggletits

PlumBumMum · 05/02/2009 17:30

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 05/02/2009 18:37

I'd normally agree.

However I'm about to give my 7yo a mobile (my old one) as her childminder this week did not pick her up from school and this is the 4th time its happened since Sept.

School have been asked to ring the
childminder or my DH if this happens but instead they insist on ringing me on my mobile - they can never get hold of me as I can't have my mobile on at work. So this time I checked my messages at 6:30pm to find a message from school saying that DD had gone home with Mrs X. But I don't know anyone called Mrs X and was slightly hysterical. Turned out they meant Mrs Y (another parent) and told me the wrong name. It took some time to find ot where DD was.

So I'm now giving her a mobile phone so she can ring her dad or the childminder herself. Or so that I can ring her and find out where the heck she is.

newpup · 05/02/2009 19:01

My DDs (9 & 7) are very spoilt. They have ipods and ds consoles, we also bought them a wii for Christmas. However, there are a few things I draw the line at...

No t.v. in room not until they are 16.

No ear piercing until 16

No mobile phone until secondary school

I expect them to be polite, well mannered, considerate girls who think about other peoples feelings. I also expect them to work very hard at school.

If they have everything at such a young age what is there to look forward to? I also work on the principle that they need to be mature enough to fully appreciate the item and responsible for its use. At 6 years old, they do not have a means to pay for the calls and therefore can not be totally responsible for it.

piscesmoon · 05/02/2009 19:14

YANBU you have to feel very sorry for the poor child. I would try and take her out with your family, without her parents,and get muddy, run around and do all the things that 6 yr old should do.

kizzib · 05/02/2009 20:37

I'm glad the OP posted this, I only found out the other day that DH's 6 year old niece had a mobile phone. I was really shocked!

I would give my dd a mobile when she gets to that age but ONLY because I am deaf and use text messages to communicate (so if something was wrong she wouldn't be able to phone me normally)

But under normal circumstances, NO WAY!!! kids should be kids!

So YANBU

mm22bys · 06/02/2009 07:23

A six year old does not need a mobile, but I would be more concerned at her not having any books!

cory · 06/02/2009 07:59

Dd got her first mobile aged 10 (I think). But that was to enable her to walk home alone from school despite having a disability that means she can collapse any moment. It's like the alarm button her gran wears around her neck, not a toy.

Lotster · 06/02/2009 15:08

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks - that's awful!! You must have been so worried.

But surely changing your childminder is a better solution?? Forgetting her mindee four times in as many months is appalling...

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 07/02/2009 22:16

I've looked and can't find another childminder. We live in a village where there aren't a lot of them at all.

mumeeee · 07/02/2009 23:18

YANBU. A 6 year old does not need a mobile phone.

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