To not want DS to go on a playdate where he'll be looked after by a non English speaker

[redskyatnight]

DS's friend X has 2 parents that work full time. Until recently, he was picked up from school and looked after by his aunt. Aunt and I were friendly and the 2 children regularly went on playdates with each other (both with and without myself/aunt).

His aunt has now moved away and X is now looked after by another family member. however this family member has just moved to this country and speaks no English (native Spanish speaker).

X is keen to have DS round to play (and DS keen to go) but I am uneasy how DS will get along with X's family member as they don't speak a common language. X is bi-lingual and could interpret but I think that is a big ask for a 5 year old!

I can obviously invite myself (which means DD coming too) as well which is probably what we'll end up doing , but wondered if I was BU (and a bit pfb) to not just send him on his own.

(Of course I'm assuming here that X's carer would be happy to have DS round on his own, which she may not be anyway).

Actually, I think this could be beneficial for your DS! It certainly wouldn't cause that many problems that I could foresee. Anything that he needed could be translated by his friend, and he may pick up a few Spanish words. At the very least, he'll gain an awareness of other languages and cultures.

Anyway, DS can always tell you he doesn't want to go if there is a problem after 1 playdate, couldn't he?

TBH, I think he would be absolutely fine. X must have some way to communicate (even if not verbally) with English speakers or presumably she'd be a bit stuffed trying to buy a loaf of bread.

I think it would be great for your DS! Maybe he'll learn some Spanish.

YABU, why not just pick him up after an hour or so and let him tell you if it was ok.

YABU he might actually learn something!

YABU and terribly pfb. Your DS can only benefit. There are people that pay for similar situations.

My DD is only 3 and has no problems translating for people, I don't see why it would be too difficult for a 5yo.

YABU - children at this age have an amazing capacity to communicate and overcome things like language barriers and I think this will be a hugely beneficial experience for him.

Havign been raised speaking 3 languages I can assure you that it is absolutely NO big ask for X to interpret. It will come naturally to him.
Also, teh aunt will probably speak basic English.
Also, your ds will have a great time and be opened to languages other than English.

Send him! Honestly, don't worry so much. And do not go with him.

I think YABU - I worked as a nanny in Germany, and at first spoke little or no German. My charge was a bilingual 5 year old, and as far as I know none of his friends parents ever had a problem with them coming home with me. At 5, they take themselves off to play together and the only things the carer really needs to know if is they want a drink/something to eat/have hurt themselves - and a bilingual 5 year old is more than capable of translating those requests!

YABvU. He will be fine. Small children are extremely unphased by being spoken to in a foreign language as they are in full language development and accept that there are many words they do not understand. I am assuming your son is neurotypical (if he had an ASD disorder not understanding may cause him distress). I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill.

YABVU and precious. Agree will all of the above.

what hippipotami said ! I'd send my ds

Agree with everyone above. If worst came to the worst (emergency), it sounds like the five year could interpret anyway.

Your Ds will only learn from this situation...

I had 8 of my dd's Belgian friend's round for a party and they were fine! Well the apartment was trashed but kids were all happy. One of them got over excited and there were tears, but a cuddle is the same in any language. My dd translated things for me where it was necessary.

He'll be fiiiiiine. Yoiu're being very pfbish. Send him and don't go.

As a child most of my friends' families didn't speak English. I never starved to death for want of the Urdu word for sandwich. It wasn't all that long ago your ds couldn't speak English either - childrens' needs are basic and easily communicated in sign and body language. He'll barely notice.

I can't see it causing any problems.

I knew many expats in Zimbabwe who had maids who looked after younger children during the day. Quite often the maids couldn't speak any English at all but everyone was happy.

yabu
children don't talk that much, he will be busy playing

It will only be a positive experience, and hopefully your child will come back with a thirst for learning about other countries, cultures and languages.

on duchesse's note - my dd2 is atypical and we tried this once.
note once.

the other two would have no issues, but don't do it with kids who are not NT without a whole shed-load of prep, lol.

hope he has fun - get him to watch a bit of Dora first lol.

He'll be fine & his friend can help if a problem. If anything major they can always phone you.

YABU sorry - X can easily translate if necessary

YABU, I'd jump at the chance personally!

YABU
I remember the first time my DH left me alone to explain a problem to a plumber in Spain.

It was very educational and i was very proud of myself.

YABU and pfb.

I actually can't understand why this has even been raised as a problem!