to want just one day when the kids do not break/ruin/destroy something

[zanz1bar]

all you newbie parents take your most treasured items and throw them one by one of a cliff edge chanting...it doesn't matter, its only stuff, i love my children. zen.

i come down stairs this morning, barefoot and step on my grandmothers opal ring on the kitchen floor minus opal.

walk into the sitting room to have a little conversation with dd, to find ds climbing along windowsill knocking over a glass reed diffuser...broken glass and stinky room freshner now spilt on sofa/carpet/curtains.

back into kitchen for tea and valium/gin . notice kitchen scales on work top with biro jammed into the back....why the heck did they do that, its just so random.

i give up, there is nothing left, they have destroyed everything.

how old are they?

you can either:
a) not leave them alone
b) not leave opal rings and glass reed diffusers around

Were they alone?

Thank God they weren't hurt.
Was anyone with them?

I'm sorry to say that it doesn't get any better as they get older. DD12 broke off my brand new kitchen cupboard door cos she got the handle stuck on the belt loop of her jeans DS19 has pulled off the washing machine door handle cos he had left his house key in his trouser pocket. he has also broken most of the door handles in the house cos he just bloody yanks them down, instead of opening them normally. I could go on but I can feel my blood pressure mounting as I type

How old?

5 and 4.
opal ring in a box, in a jewellry box, on a chest of drawers, in the attic room.
reed thigy on small window sill thats five foot from floor.
god knows why they wanted the scales.

yesterday in was dh book... felt tip pen

my dc are not allowed downstairs in the morning without me, they are generally good, but I know if I allowed them downstairs alone I would walk into a similair scenario as you.

Fwiw I used to have this with ds1. It was only in hindsight that I realised he actually needed supervision, it hadn't occurred to me that this is what happens if children are left to theri own devices.

Ds2 is much easier, because I watch what he's doing!

ouch slap in the face now i feel guilty to have not even thought that they could have been hurt, just so ,so,so aaarargh.
bad mummy sunday morning not reading latin to them, just wanted a lie in.

I don't think you can leave a 5 and a 4 alone together for long TBH. Can you make a rule that they stay in their bedroom til you get up? Maybe leave some biscuits or little packets of cereal for them so they can have a picnic?

No YANBU but it is unlikely.

I have 4DSs and don't have anything nice on display or lovely new things. All our furniture is either cheap or handmedowns. I would love a new telly but what's the point - DS4 crayoned all over one (which was an old one mum & dad gave us when they undated theirs).

We got a new puppy a couple of weeks ago - as I said DH he couldn't destroy the house anymore than the DC

Im not saying my children are perfect but I cant think of anything they have broken, they know better. Maybe Ive just been lucky. What punishments are they getting for breaking things ? Mine would certainly have no treats today.

just tell me it gets better.
that one rosy sunny sunday there will be a knock on the door
'oh mother dearest would you like a cup of tea and the papers while we run your bath'
oh dream on

Well, ds1 is eleven and he does bring me tea in bed but he also slipped on his trousers [that I am always asking him to put in basket] yesterday and put his head through his bedroom window.

He was fine, just a little cut but I couldn't help feeling weary and annoyed at the nice old glass being broken. Yes, yes, heads are more important. I know.

Z, We would all like a lie in. But to ensure our dcs don't run a mock, hurt themselves or eachother we look after them. It's not about perfect parenting it's preservation!!!!

It would be lovely, wouldn't it?

But agree - you choose - lie in and come down to chaos, or get up with them and make sure they don't trash the place.

Wish it wasn't like that, but reality is - it is! Them's yer choices. That's life.

Oh and to reply to "just tell me it gets better.
that one rosy sunny sunday there will be a knock on the door
'oh mother dearest would you like a cup of tea and the papers while we run your bath'"

Yes. One day that will happen.

And the next sentence will be

"can we have the car keys/£50/a party.."

I feel your pain

DS cuddled up with me on the sofa this morning to watch TV, and when I nodded off he promptly hared off to the kitchen where he kindly 'washed up' my digital radio [sob]

This is less than a month after he took my ipod out of my bag and dunked it in the bath (and for anyone who saw my thread - sadly the rice and airing cupboard failed - I am no longer the owner of an ipod)

My mum suggested I give up on 'stuff' until he leaves home

Ds felt poorly yesterday and made a mad rush for the bathroom, poor lad. Managed to chuck up over every single stair of the carpeted staircase except one. I don't know if it was due to the state of the carpet or the contents of his stomach at that particular time, but it was the hardest cleaning job I have ever done.

When do they get old enough to mop up their own sick?

i cant turn my back on ds for mre than a few minutes. Far too headstrong got myself to blame there though lol.

When i was a kid we werent allowd downstairs until mum was.. We had the landing and hall lights on different switches so could have ne or the other on IYKWIM so when hall light was on we were allowd to go downstairs. Could you do something like that?

Don't let them downstairs on their own, no.
Mine are 8 and 4 and we still have a stairgate.I expect them to dress and paly upstairs until i am ready to go down.

And punish them. A 4 year old is old enough to know not to do these things. If it had been my 4 year old I would have cancelled a treat or sent him to bed again.

Drives me wild when kids break and mistreat things.I will not tolerate it.

I probably would expect to have to supervise a 4-yo fairly closely or keep things looked up.

But I wonder how Moondog gets away with asking an 8yo to be confined by a stairgate. My 8yo gets ups and makes his own toast in the morning (and if I ask nicely he'll take me some in bed), he makes his own way home from school and will run to the shops for me: I can't imagine treating such an old child like a pre-school child.

I don't lie in.
Ever.
So asking an 8 year old to dress and tidy and sort herself out is hardly babying.

We have a stairgate, a fabric one that it seems only me, my dad and DP can operate.

Still this morning in half an hour we had playhouse destroyed, fight over dummies, lamp pulled off wall and some glorious psychological bullying. All in one room.

I would have got up if my MS wasn't so bad... honest.

I'm so scared for when the next DC arrives!

my 3,5,8 and 9 year olds can be trusted not to break things, but not to not make a mess. I wouldn't tolerate destructiveness, but I also don't have alot of breakable things.

We don't lie in while the children go down I'm afraid.

Blimey MD.

Mine are 6 and 4 and they get their own breakfast on Sundays, have never broken anything and are happy to play, draw, watch tv, unsupervised.

I would be furious and they would be severely punished if they had done what yours did.