to think that it is actually quite offensive to suggest that someone who doesn't like performing certain sexual acts is uptight/buttoned up/lacking in some way...?

[wannaBe]

yes thread off the back of a thread I know. So shoot me I don't really care...

As women we are told that we should be in control. That we should never feel forced into doing something we are not comfortable with.

And yet I have just read comments on another thread basically criticising women for not feeling comfortable with certain sexual acts. Calling them selfish if they do not perform certain things for their dh's gratification. Suggesting that women who don't like to do certain things are uptight.

Since when should anything go just because it's what someone else would find pleasurable? Since when did it become wrong/unacceptable/even frowned upon to find something horrible and refuse to do it?

What other people do in the bedroom is their business. So surely what I and others refuse to do in the bedroom is also our business and no-one has the right to judge that?

I offend very very rarely, but I find it pretty offensive tbh that there are people who think that all women should do whatever the hell their dh's want because we somehow owe it to them..

Do women not have the right to say no any more then?

Actually, I don't think it makes sense to suggest that the success of a relationship is determined by one's attitudes about sexual preferences, as you can have a great sex life with someone who is completely unsuitable in other ways.

but frosty, the nuts in a Snickers can get "lost" forever up there.......

My mouth is for food and drink - not willies. Tried it on a few ex partners before DH and nearly barfed. I certainly don't feel like I'm missing anything.

Macdoodle, I knew that! I was defending the OP of this thread.

Macdoodle, I knew that! I was defending the OP of this thread.

People need to be less judgemental! I'm fairly new to the site and am gobsmacked on a daily basis at how judgemental and occasionally down right rude people are to eachother!

FWIW - I think YANBU - its rude to suggest your sexual preferences imply you are uptight - the same should be said of people who like more risque kinds of sex - its their business and noone elses and how dare the rest of us pass judgement

By HecateQueenOfGhosts on Sun 25-Jan-09 10:12:02
It amazes me that anyone would care. Totally amazes me. I mean, how does it affect you in any way if someone else closes the door and does or does not give their dp oral or anal or buggers them roughly with a chunky kitkat?

Just about wet myself laughing!! I love your posts!

I couldn't agree with your post more.

OP Each to their own I say. Personally I enjoy it - but would never call anyone frigid or whatever for not doing it. Their Dp's might be a bit but that's something they need to discuss just as with anything else in a relationship (no-one jump on the bandwagon about womens rights 'to say no' as I would say the same if the bloke didn't want to do something the woman did - they need to discuss it (so the other person understands that's it's a 'no').

Women judge women so much more harshly than men judge women - always astounds me!

Is this still going? Thought it was light-hearted friday night silliness (apols to OP of OTHER thread not trying to be demeaning about your question but it did disintegrate quite quickly into silliness, did it not?)

Would just like to say, it does seem a trifle short-sighted to ignore impact of abuse on sex. This does not make a person uptight but does often make for a person who lives with the shadow of a traumatic experience, and this may shape their preferences, non?

wannabe - well I'm not going to call you unreasonable for a start.