To want to knee this chap in the GingGangGoolies

[CuttySark]

My daughter has joined a local scout group.
She is registered disabled (not that this should make any difference but it seems to)...anyway, any activity, trip out etc the scout leader has either been less than helpful with the info or has phoned us at the last minute and this has led to our daughter missing out on a lot.

I have asked if they would write things down for her (she can barely write and becomes confused by dates and numbers).They have not done this.

There is a 'camp' coming up and her big brother is going along as her carer and had to fill in the disclosure form. Except the scout leader messed up the form but did not tell my son this then demanded that we come in with a new form immediately or dd would not get to camp.
We managed to get the other form filled in and handed in but no apology and no confirmation that she is going to camp.

Finally, there was a trip at the weekend but they left without her but phoned me from the motorway to say she was not there. I tried to catch them but the bloody scout leader kept phoning me (while I was driving) to say they were doing 65mph and I would have to do at least 75 to catch them.

Am I being unreasonable to;

1. Think he is being a bit discriminatory ?
2. To shove his woggle where the sun does not shine?

why didn't she get there in time? Why did they leave without her?

yanbu - sounds like a right pillock.

dear lord, he sounds like a prize arse!
Actually no that is too generous. What he is doing is the same as constructive dissmissal in the workplace. He has obviously decided for whatever reason that it is too much effort on his part to include your daughter and so is going out of his way to make it impossible for you and her to be part of this group.
I am on your behalf (your poor dd!) and will happily come and hold him down while you insert woggle. And Bravo for the thread title by the way....

He's an arse and needs reporting, if that's possible.

I would ask the leader who the regional co-ordinator is and ask to see their inclusion policy.

Grrr what a tosser. This page has the info you need on what the Scout Association says about special needs.

Just remember that the woggle should be inserted sideways mollyroger!!

Seriously, I'd be contemplating a complaint further up the Scouting hierachy - the District Commissioner or whatever the equivalent rank is in the scouts.

I hope you get this sorted - your dd deserves far better treatment than she's getting from this plonker - as well as it being a terrible example for him to set for the other scouts of tolerance and inclusivity (not sure that's a word).

he sounds like he had some isshoos with disabilty and needs a lecture from someone on inclusion. I suppose you could write to him officially complaining at your treatment, then if no apology, write to the Scout Association.

Here are the contact details for the Head Office

This might be interesting for you too

"It is important that young people are seen as individuals and that they are regarded equally as Members of the Movement, whatever their abilities" from the Scoutbase site.

A quick e-mail to Gilwell Park's special needs team will get him a suitable kick up the arse.

Aah x posted with Weblette

What a cockmunch.
Go get him, Cuttysark.
You should dib dab dob him in.

@minouminou.

Probably going to be bashed for this I don't agree with the way he's handled things at all - childish and inappropriate but I think he is giving a lot of time and energy for what is pressumably a voluntary (unpaid) position so not evil.

He may not be aware of the support available from the social inclusion group - it also goes on to say other stuff about inclussion where possible and setting up special groups. Does he understand sufficiently your DDs abilities?

Yes he should wise up but if we bash too hard rather than gently educate and persuade it will end up as another closed group because no one will run the groups encase they get mobed.

I think you're right to be peeved and right to contact the scouting movement but about his re-education and support and not about kicking him up the arse.

Why don't you ask him directly when you pick up/drop off if any messages were given out that week?

Thank you all for your replies.
I have explained dd's special needs to him several times.
It was important to her joining the scouts as she is very isolated and home educated too so we rarely see people.
The other infuriating issue is that almost every week without fail we are being asked for quite a bit of money
subs £20 (fair enough)
the trip we missed £35 but no refund because we missed it.
camp £35 for dd, £35 for son as carer plus the scout leader asked for £10 for the food we have to provide -I mean, where is the logic in that?
I took a red rage trying to sew the badges on her uniform without clear instructions about where they go. The webpage showing the badge position is unclear.

The scout leader's e mails are so ambiguous that I have had to email him several times to explain what he means eg "Group picked up at church hall"
Me - Which church hall, which date, what time?
SL "The main church hall"........

Finally, when my son went over the disclosure form with the scout leader he was told "This form just says you have not been caught yet". My son was totally shocked and did not like the implication. He is only going to the camp to help his sister.

Why did you miss the trip?

Why is there so much email and phone contact? Is this for you or for all the parents?

Yep you pay when you don't turn up on time for trips - not scout leaders fault

And yes it is always difficult to know where to put the badges - not scout leaders fault

Subs sound expensive - £3.50 here however trips are dearer (£100 for the week camping)

Yes, it's true about the crb check, it does just mean you have nothing recorded against you

To be frank he sounds like he has communication difficulties or not great interpersonal skills - he may be like that with everybody. It may not be personal and you may need to tell him again that your daughter can't remember dates and times - I would email him with that so you have it in writing.

Why did she miss the trip?

yanbu

(i love your name btw, used to go & see it alot)

Find a different group, even if you have to travel to do so.

She missed the trip as we did not know it was last Saturday. Dd had been told but had not remembered.
We are quite a distance from the village where the scouts are held so it would have taken at least half an hour to get there.
What peed me off is that he phoned to say they would wait in a lay-by then he phoned to change this, ditto they were now not going to wait and had reached the motor way. I almost caught them up but he was by now becoming an idiot saying I would have to go faster. I was travelling at 80 and realised the whole idea was not worth getting flattened on the road for.

We appreciate that re the disclosure form - it is not the easiest of subjects to broach with someone so perhaps he tried to make a joke...I don't know.

The badge positions are not the leader's fault but I feel that he could have done a simple drawing for dd to take home to me.The Scottish flag badge is not mentioned on the badge position website, only the Union flag.
I will speak to him after the meetings to see what is required for the following week and how much it will be.

We appreciate too how these scout organisers give of there free time but when I hear my dd saying that she does not feel wanted because she feels different from the rest, it saddens us a great deal.

There is another camp which dd is not going to as it cost £195 plus a passport (for Ireland) plus spending money. Ditto for her carer.

I just wish this guy would cut us some slack and communicate in a more coherent manner.

CS

It seems to me that you really want your dd to this, and it is important to her and to you. I think the best solution is to befriend another parent, explain that you are having difficulty getting info, and ask if when they get info from their child they could pass it on to you.

If this is not possible, you are going to have to communicate directly with the scout leader (which doesn't sound easy), and I do think you will find it easier to do it face to face at the time, rather than through phone calls and emails.

In terms of the carers cost, it might be worth looking on the website to see if they have any kind of discretionary fund. The actual cost per child (you said £35 for a camp and £195 to go to Ireland) are actually quite reasonable. £35 is very cheap compared to what a school would charge.

I hope everything works out.

I think they are being Very discriminatory, and it would definitely be worth speaking to someone further up the organisation. NO little girl should not feel wanted by the LEADER of the group....

It is a shocking read and I'm sure that any scout leader within the organisation would be shocked to know that it is happening.

tbh I've tried to read in an understanding light but his failure to communicate, does need addressing.