Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in thinking feeding a 3.5mth old baby chocolate isn't a spectator sport???

104 replies

glaskhamhasoneintheoven · 12/01/2009 12:53

I was picking DS up from nursery today, one of the mums was there with her friends (parents of other nursery children) and she pulled out a bag of milkybar buttons and started feeding them to her baby... Her and her 3 friends were all stood round the pram laughing and poking them back in when she spat them out... At one point she was holding her lips closed saying 'come on just eat it'. In the 5mins we were waiting a few other parents gathered around the pram to watch, all laughing and giggling about feeding a baby chocolate... One mum asked the babies mum how old she was, the mother replied '3.5mths, I've been giving them to her since xmas, she loves them' so at 3mths she was feeding her baby buttons!!!!

I was horrified!! Seeing this... I was also horrified to see so many other parents thinking it was highly amusing!! So AIBU??? I just couldn't go on the rest of the day without ranting about this, and DH is at work so I can't rant to him!!

OP posts:
Original poster
glaskhamhasoneintheoven · 12/01/2009 13:39

I'm so glad I'm NBU.... Now i just have to wonder wether i do anything or just keep my mouth shut and hope someone else does something to either 'inform' the mother or inform someone else of what she's doing.

OP posts:
treedelivery · 12/01/2009 13:40

So depressing. Was in card shop yesterday and heard 'cor mum come look at this' and then heard reply of 'get you fucking little arsed cunt over here or I'll batter you and starve you'

Went outside to cry. Had urge to a) grab kid and run, she could just live with me we have loads of space or b) ask them where they went to school so my dc's never have to hear this.
Neither option right nor appropriate but how I felt.

Original poster
glaskhamhasoneintheoven · 12/01/2009 13:41

arabicabean- OMG- thats awful.... my 2 only just get maltesers and pink wafers.... and they are as 'pudding' once in a while, Myself or DH will finish the rest

OP posts:
wotulookinat · 12/01/2009 13:43

Not good. Poor baby.

Original poster
glaskhamhasoneintheoven · 12/01/2009 13:43

treedelivery- thats awful... you wouldn't believe some of the thigns i've heard parents sayign to/calling their DC's at the nursery!! I very nearly took DS out of nursery because of what he had to see or hear from other parents, but there isn't any other nurserys around here

OP posts:
MrsBadger · 12/01/2009 13:53

I think that leaflet was about first foods for food- or lump-phobic DC, not for ordinary healthy ones

they're all foods that 'melt' or dissolve in the mouth rather than needing lots of chewing

important for some SN

MamacitaGordita · 12/01/2009 13:57

This post has made me feel actually quite sad. And I do think, chocolate, lip holding and laughing combined, that it is bordering on abusive. Horrible horrible horrible.

arabicabean · 12/01/2009 14:01

Unfortunately I am not joking about the leaflet.
MrsBadger - my baby is an "ordinary healthy" one. The leaflet does not refer to SN or some feeding problem.
Even for bite and melt foods, there are healthier examples. And no, I would never give my baby any of the items mentioned.

loobeylou · 12/01/2009 14:03

arabica I can't believe that!!

thumbwitch · 12/01/2009 14:06

no YANBU at all - I am so sad when I hear about these ignoramuses/ignorami (Pedants' corner alert) forcefeeding their child junk at such an early age.

I only let DS get a whiff of chocolate at 10mo and he still only gets a tiny bit of choc ice cream at 13mo; he has never had solid chocolate.

backalleysally · 12/01/2009 14:18

Urrhh! This really riles me.

The child no doubt will soon also have juice in a bottle and as weaning progresses a pastie for its dinner ( with all the bits all over the pram).

It's down to poor education....they dont know any better unfortunately.

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/01/2009 14:25

some people just dont derserve children

and why is it the pikies who manage to breed and pop out 3/4 children, which they dont really want

and yet someone who is desperate to be a mum, cant conceieve?

as i said it is a type of abuse

PoloPlayingMummy · 12/01/2009 14:33

The poor, poor baby What kind of parent forces chocolate into any child let alone a 3.5mo that isn't really ready for any solids.

The ignorance of some people really makes me . It doesn't take a lot of thought to realise chocolate is not a suitable food for a baby

Gorionine · 12/01/2009 14:33

I am lost for word both at the situation OP descibed and at the leaflet arabicabean mentionned.

stroppyknickers · 12/01/2009 14:35

backalleysally - i think they do know better but can't be bothered. It's not education, it's attitude. It is a lot easier to shove a few chips at a baby to hold and chew than to cut, butter and sandwich together some bread. A lot easier to feed a baby chocolate than to patiently spoon feed yoghurt into it etc.

lovelysongbirdie · 12/01/2009 14:42

i know most people don't like to say anything for fear of starting a row.
but sometimes you have to
because that is fucking disgusting.
esp holding the babys mouth shut, didn't they realsie that was the babys gag reflex trying to push it out.

ffs some people

sunnygirl1412 · 12/01/2009 15:00

I had a similar incident when ds1 was a similar age. I met a teenage mum, who'd been on the postnatal ward with me, with her baby and her mum at the HV's clinic. I sat next to grandma who was proudly telling me how she was feeding the baby from her own plate and how much he liked chocolate.

I was shocked but didn't have the confidence to say anything about it myself - but did say to the grandma, "Oh you must definitely tell the HV that, when you see her!" I know it was cowardly, but I hoped she would tell the HV who would then be able to tell her the proper guidelines.

Flibbertyjibbet · 12/01/2009 15:02

As you say its today, then it can't be my sil.
at 15 weeks her dd1 was given apple sauce off the sunday dinner on a spoon and then the chocolate sauce from the pudding. The whole extended family were leaning across the table oo-ing and ah-ing and mil clasped her hands beaming 'oooo she's just had her first taste of chocolate!!' Like it was a farking milestone.

Some months later the ils constantly accused me of starving ds1 with 'just milk'. If I had never met dps family I would not know that real people could really have that sort of attitude towards feeding babies unsuitable food and far too early weaning.

Oh and recently I saw a mum standing in the doorway of the local bargain shop decanting blue panda pop into her tiny baby's bottle.

(decanting??? honest its not that posh round here )

MsG · 12/01/2009 15:13

I'd have a word with someone at the nursery maybe??

Nekabu · 12/01/2009 17:20

p.s., Still reeling at the original post and some of other the stories that have been posted here ...

Original poster
glaskhamhasoneintheoven · 12/01/2009 17:37

I dont think the nursery staff would tell me anything, they'd prob think I was being a nosey-body wouldn't they... I mean I'd really need her address and full name to be able to inform a health visitor wouldn't I?

OP posts:
pamelat · 12/01/2009 18:14

That is disgusting.
I do give DD the occassional chocolate but she is 12 months old and I still feel a bit about it!! I did it to try to prove I was not PFB!
However 3 months is tiny tiny and its almost abuse to force the child to eat them. Why on earth would he/she need them????

pamelat · 12/01/2009 18:18

The nursery might be able to say something without mentioning you?

Original poster
glaskhamhasoneintheoven · 12/01/2009 18:24

Maybe they would say something.... I am still reluctant to give my DC's chocolate now... they are 4.1yo and 2.9yo... they were given 7 selection oxes each for xmas and i think so far they've had 4 bars each from it- mummy is fast eating the rest and they haven't noticed!! Chocolate isn't important to them and they dont notice!! Good job i'm craving it as i never normally have it in the house, and now luckily when i ahve loads to get 'rid' of i want it!! I will be heartbroken when its all been eaten!!

There is nothing in a childs diet that means they need chocolate, they can get enough sugar from cordial juices, fruits and sweet puddings etc...

OP posts:
sausagenmash · 12/01/2009 18:46

Aaaaaagh that's terrible!!! They're lucky the mini chav-let didn't choke!!! Jeeeezuz.

Did anyone see that thing on telly last year - 1 ton Dad - it was American I think - he was in hospital (duh) to lose weight prior to surgery. The whole family were mahoosive. What shocked me was footage of his daughter (aged 20ish) with her 6 month old on her lap letting her nibble her giant supersized burger!!! FFS!!!!!!!!